Okay it's my boss that I was having a relationship with 6 months ago. Now trying to establish new boundaries.....
He is really useless and lies about work being done and because I'm co dependent, I over extend myself and ended up working on Saturday which I was resentful of.
Another colleague and I went to complete a task that was outstanding. (My bit of the task I was assured was done by a junior person - as it's a routine Admin job, I then found out it hadn't been done, he assured me it had, twice) .
Myself and colleague had a meeting booked regarding this project. He happened to see colleague and said one person who was due at meeting was not going to be there;, he also told her not to bother doing the admin task, despite HIS manager questioning him as to why it was not done. She then sent me an anxious text message saying ah felt like she was being a pain towards him and he was unhappy with her.
I then called him and during this call he started asking me for work I know absolutely nothing about in a rambling sort of way.
In any other situation I would think it was a deliberate attempt to undermine me but things like this happen all the time and he is so ineffectual that things are constantly amiss. He is however extremely charming and able to win people over and can be sweet and affable and funny.
He has alienated so many people but has a circle of yes men and women; people that tend to be unqualified unprofessional types. The professionals have long gone.
I called him after the colleagues message to say that I'd had the message and felt frustrated that peramerters were changing all the time.
I then later forwarded the message with an apology afterwards.
My next message was going to be 'please could you let me know if meeting times and days are changing'
Then I deleted it...
Then I got the message about me being rude in the morning
Yes I need to leave this place as soon as I can