I will try to cut the story short. We will be divorcing at some point in the next year or so, could be longer. We still live together and weekends are unbearable. DH is dragging things with mediation so the progress is slow. He has been unpleasant, starting anrguments and calling me names for the last year. It started when I was pregnant and he got very friendly with a female work colleague sharing stories of his ‘awful’ wife (my sin for example is asking him to do 50/50 nursery pick ups which ‘disrespects’ his work. He doesn’t do much mental load besides ironing his own work shirt and doing the weekly bins and his work allows him to plan his day however he wishes. We both work). In the last few months I started to feel like I am making things up and I am over sensitive. Then the anger came and I started writing things down to vent off and realised he is a prolific liar and changes facts. He also calls me an abuser which makes me worried. He is very close to his parents and told them that I threatened to kick him out of the house and made threats against them, none of which is true. They stopped contact with me since the news of the divorce. Today he called me crazy and when I responded saying that’s horrible thing to say and I feel abused he said I am abusing him. Also today he shoved something in the kitchen cupboard and when he opened it again a bit of hot chocolate powder spilt out. He reacted by shouting: oh my god what have you done! Why would you put hot chocolate on the edge. He found another issue today. I was baking elaborate cake with DD and joked that I will need take away becuase I cannot face anymore of food prep and washing up and he went defensive saying in raised voice: so now you refusing to cook for everyone and only thinking about yourself. Nothing is ever his fault and he cannot apologise but when I point out that simple apology would be kind he says I am the one who cannot say sorry. He always turns things so he is a victim and I am the abuser. Any challenge of his behaviour meets with him finding a fault in me. Is this abuse, narcissistic behaviour, low self esteem? How can I survive living with him for months?