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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DF dog, am I BU?

10 replies

GiantYorkshirePud · 05/11/2025 19:05

I’ll try to keep it short.

My father has an untrained, very anxious springer spaniel. I’ve recently found out she growls at children.

Prior to DD (9 months), arriving in February this year, i was ok with DF bringing his dog to visit our house as he lives 2 hours away.

However, DF visited with his dog when DD was newborn, it was a total disaster. We said she could come but stay in the kitchen. She barged through the kitchen/lounge and ran onto the sofa where me and DD was, it frightened and shocked me, I had a csection with nasty infection and simply couldnt move myself to get away quick enough. DF stood there dumbstruck until DH got her down and put her in the garden where she howled and cried for the whole neighbourhood to hear. Scratched my patio door to bits. She then peed in the kitchen (as she does every visit) and jumped all over furniture.

Since then he has visited without the dog, and leaves her with his girlfriend.

He is now asking to bring his dog on his next visit, as his girlfriend wants to visit too. He said he would keep the dog on a short lead.

I said I would think about it, but actually I still feel uncomfortable with this. DD is crawling and cruising, I dont want the kitchen floor to be covered in dog wee yet again.

He doesnt have anyone else to look after his dog, so I feel guilty, but i also feel like it isn’t my problem to resolve?

Thank you.

OP posts:
SquishyGloopyBum · 05/11/2025 19:07

He can pay for a sitter or kennels. Stand your group op.

Justmuddlingalong · 05/11/2025 19:11

Your priority is your DD.
He either puts the dog in kennels or pays for a dog sitter.
Don't feel bad about saying no.
His badly behaved animal is his responsibility, not yours.

Cherrysoup · 05/11/2025 19:19

Absolutely not. The dog does not come into your house, ever. And I say this as the owner of two spaniels.

Bluehels · 05/11/2025 19:39

No way. His request is putting his girlfriend and dog first. You need to be clear that you are putting your daughter first and the dog is not welcome.

Zempy · 05/11/2025 19:44

He only lives two hours away so he can visit for an hour, or bring dog and leave it in the car.

Cosyblankets · 05/11/2025 20:01

What happens with the dog when you go to his house?

ShesTheAlbatross · 05/11/2025 20:03

Why would he think he can bring his poorly trained dog into your house??

Ihavepaidalotforthisstory · 05/11/2025 20:03

Dog can sit in his car. Do not feel guilty the priority is the baby not your dad, not the dog and not the girlfriend.

CousinBob · 05/11/2025 20:34

If the dog has had a really good walk she will be OK in the car for an hour or so.

Endofyear · 05/11/2025 20:39

Just say no. It's not unreasonable at all to not want an untrained dog in your house with your baby. Your dad will have to book.a dogsitter for the day.

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