To go to the GP?

[Caleb64]

Right I need some help here please. I can handle brutality on this one I think because something has to change even if that’s me.

I have 4 children, I’ve been a Mum since I was 19 and I’m now most likely peri menopausal and still have young children. Trying not to be too outing but also want people to realise this isn’t my 1st rodeo so to speak. I’m also a primary school teacher so feel pretty well trained in child development.

However, daughter just turned 8 and omg the mood swings are killing me! It feels seriously abnormal! I’m considering going to the GP or paying for some blood work privately because this girl falls out with me every single second of the day. Is my patience thin because I’m aging? Peri menopausal? Or have I spoiled her? I don’t think I’ve done anything differently to my eldest daughter who wasn’t like this. I’ve tried talking to her end reasoning with her or explaining that falling out with me and refusing to answer me because she’s upset about something - usually absolutely nothing (I know it’s not nothing to her but seriously it is usually the tiniest thing you could even imagine) is making me sad. She’s worse at bedtime, refusing to have a cuddle because she didn’t want to go to bed for example but then crying because I’m leaving the room and she hasn’t had a cuddle even though I’ve sung her nursery rhymes and read some of a story and asked her if she would like a cuddle 300 times arrgggghhh. What would I even say to the GP? Maybe it’s me that needs the help! But it doesn’t feel normal.

The only medical thing I can even think could be a problem is her blood sugar levels (were high) so maybe I should follow up on that even though we were fobbed off in A&E when it was elevated because it came down within an hour.

Sounds like she's just flexing her muscles,anything to delay bedtime I'm not sure what a doctor can do really.

And I would only ask once if she wants a cuddle, if she says no then ignore her protests.

Yeah maybe, I’m fairly strict or so I thought. None of the other 3 were or are like this. It’s relentless and not just at bedtime. She’s constantly ‘in a mood ‘.

Yes I’ll try that. I feel bad leaving her upset and I’ve tried explaining to her that she’ll be upset if I leave the room while she’s mad with me but she seems to be determined to show me that she’s upset with me (over nothing).

Blood sugar is temporarily elevated when the body is stressed - when a child is unwell for instance. That's why they were reassured when it returned to normal.

Just because your oldest daughter wasn't like this doesn't mean it's abnormal - it could just be different behaviour/different place in the family - oldest and youngest children are generally very different.

Is there any other signs of early puberty? Any hair growth/body changes that could signal this/any other physical concerns? Or is purely behavioural?

two things can be true at the same time. You may benefit from some HRT and she may be testing the waters very hard. If your hormones are going downhill, HRT will help on this ride. all of mine have SN and can be challenging. I am coping so much better since taking HRT.

How old are you btw?

Could be hormonal I suppose. She gets bad body odour and has to use deodorant despite frequent washing (I feel guilty talking about her like that but it’s just a fact).

I’m 46, I have a ND child and whilst challenging I’m finding my daughter harder and that’s saying something!

There is a hormone surge around 7 or 8 which could account for the mood swings - Google adrenache. My youngest was very emotional for a good while around that age and I put it down to hormones.

I can’t believe I forgot that she complains of stomach ache all day long!

Thank you!

Stomach ache sounds like she might be stressed. You've said you have a ND child could she be ND also and becoming stressed as she's masking at school? And then taking it out on you at home where she feels safe?

Oh god don’t! I have often thought she may be ND but there is no way she’s ever getting a diagnosis I can tell you that. She does well in school and is very polite and sociable. Of course I know this doesn’t mean she isn’t but I know how hard it is to get a diagnosis or support even with a chromosome abnormality. She has a simian line on one hand and I’ve often wondered if she may have mosaic DS but again the GP would not refer for generic testing and that’s out of my financial realm to afford private genetic testing.

@Caleb64 i had to google simian line and aside from genetics the palmistry spiel made me laugh “In palmistry, the simian line is thought to reflect a merging of emotional and intellectual traits. People with this line may exhibit intense focus and deep emotional experiences. However, they may also face challenges in balancing these aspects of their personality”. As a parent of a ND child who wasn’t diagnosed til secondary, never dismiss ND entirely in a younger girl if hormones are causing a lot of upset…they are far likely to fall under the radar if they are higher intellect, well behaved and have a secure home life! But it could purely be personality clash , is she anything like you?

Interesting. Unfortunately I do remember being moody as a child and often feeling offended, I was considered sensitive 😂. I think I might just be tired! I might speak to the SendCo at school, she may be able to take part in some nurture activities. I suspect we might follow the path that you and your daughter have but it would take school seeing what I see to progress there I imagine. Thanks for taking the time to answer.