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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

9 month old wakes every half hour

33 replies

sharkstale · 02/11/2025 20:49

Absolutely fed up with it now. He wakes half hour after putting him to bed, and generally roughly every half hour after that. Sometimes he goes a bit longer but it's usually around the half hour mark. He's in his cot but when I go to bed I end up putting him in with me because I can't keep getting up with him so frequently. I can't cope with getting such broken sleep anymore and fed up with never being able to unwind in the evenings now as I'm constantly running up to resettle him. I have other dc.
Nap times are the same, he does half hour then wakes. Most of the time I can get him down for a bit longer by resettling him, but recently thats been proving harder. He's also been refusing afternoon naps the last few days. He's not getting nearly enough sleep, and neither am I.
Dp works nights so can't help.
I will admit he feeds to sleep and I know this could be an issue but I can't break the habit. He'll very rarely be rocked to sleep and will just moan until I give in, which went on for 2 hours the other night.
It he's put in the cot drowsy but awake, or even if he's fast asleep but stirs as he's being lowered in, he'll just flip on his front and sit up and I have to start again.

He's been like it for months now and I'm at my wits end with it.

OP posts:
Original poster
sharkstale · 02/11/2025 22:11

Gair · 02/11/2025 22:06

We never fed to sleep (because we had been told it would cause issues) and my child woke up all the time regardless. The first 2.5 years were pure torture - he was also a two times 20 mins nap a day baby. He often would not nap at all as a toddler. I was broken from lack of sleep. Did not have any more children mainly due to this.

Anyway, he is now a pre-teen and still rarely sleeps through the night without waking and needing one of us (even on melatonin). Turns out he is ND and his sleep difficulties (and ours!) are caused by that. I spent so much time and energy sleep tracking, doing all the right things, but none of it helped and could not because the difficulty was neurodevelopmental. In these cases it can get better, but often takes longer because the brain development follows a different timetable to NT kids.

Hang in there & good luck!

If you don't mind sharing, were there any other signs of being ND that I could look out for? I've heard quite a lot that ND kids are terrible sleepers so it has crossed my mind.

OP posts:
Jollyjoy · 03/11/2025 07:15

Oh, my sympathies. My first was like this. She first slept through at 18mo and managed it regularly by time she was 3. When I had DD2 I knew I would die if I went through it again. We did something like the disappearing chair above, an Irish lady called Lucy something who I saw recommended on here. You basically sat or lay on the floor in the room beside their cot, pat, sing and comfort in various ways apart from lifting them up. Over time moving away from cot and less involved. She did start to sleep within a few nights, it wasn’t easy and totally against what my instincts wanted to do, but on balance it was better than no sleep and trying to be a mum to two children.

Jollyjoy · 03/11/2025 07:16

Ps I should say that both of mine are NT despite their terrible sleeping starts. I think some kids are just like this and breastfeeding plays a part, it seems.

londongirl12 · 03/11/2025 07:18

I had this until I changed from breastfeeding for formula. I don’t think I was producing enough and he was hungry.

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 03/11/2025 08:03

This will be unpopular! My baby would wake up constantly, screaming and crying. Midwife told me to go in and say very calmly "it's ok mummy is here, going to sleep now." Walk out close the door and turn the tv up ... do this every 30 minutes.
We battled for about 5 days and it ceased.
It was a long time ago and I know that this would not be popular now, but it worked.

Dramatic · 03/11/2025 09:18

BakedBeeeen · 02/11/2025 21:09

He can’t settle himself back to sleep and is relying on you to do it. You need to break this cycle. Stop feeding him in the night and have him in his own cot. Yes it will be hard for a night or two, max. I night- weaned my DD at 8 months. I rocked her to sleep and put her back in cot each time she woke up. For a night it was very hard, second night she only woke up once, settled much quicker, third night, didn’t wake up at all in the night. It transformed her daytime naps too. I would recommend it for you both, he can’t be getting any quality sleep at all.

This isn't guaranteed to work, my daughter was never fed at night past the normal night-feeding age, she still woke every half hour/hour. Nothing I did stopped her from waking and I genuinely believe nothing ever would have stopped her

OneKhakiMoose · 03/11/2025 18:17

What is their schedule? Wake time, bedtime, nap times and lengths?

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