Off sick and LM called me

[LazyArsedMagician]

Like...I know she has a duty of care to check in.

But I'm a) on AL until Monday anyway; b) only submitted my fit note on Tuesday; c) have been signed off with work-related stress and anxiety till Dec. Her calling has honestly made me want to throw up. It has sent me into a tailspin and I can't stop thinking about it.

She called from a private number and I was expecting a call from the dentist which is why I picked up. Surely she should have waited at least until Monday?!

Anyone got any good resources for how to deal with anxieties like this? I've just starter sertraline and propanolol, not sure if the latter has helped in this instance.

You've submitted a fit note so you are sick and not on annual leave.

Your LM should check on you, I'm sure that's company procedure.

Why are you off until December ?

I hope you are speaking with LM to address the work place stress and to make plans to return. The longer you leave it the harder it becomes.

Do you have a Employee Assistance Program at work whereby you can talk to someone confidentially and for free?

Not sure I really want to go into the whys tbh. The most I'm prepared to say is that this has been six months that has culminated in me having panic attacks about returning to work after AL.

Yes I appreciate I'm technically not on AL anymore, my question is surely a bit more time should elapse before I'm being contacted?

Firstly, as a pp has said, you are on sick leave now, and not annual leave - you should be able to claim your annual leave back later.

Secondly, you've been signed off with work related stress, so your LM has to make contact with you, really, and it is not unreasonable of them to do so.

What is it in work that is causing your stress?

What did she contact you about?

Surely it all depends on the reason for the call?

Time has elapsed. Your sick note was submitted on Tuesday and today is Friday. There is no rule to say that your LM shouldn't contact you on your first day of absence, let alone a few days later. Arguably, it would be negligent to leave it until after the weekend before making contact.

Have you sent the fit note in with any explanation or would it have come as a surprise to you LM? You say you were on annual leave, have you then just sent in your sick note whilst on leave?

I think i would rung also in those circumstances

My question is surely a bit more time should elapse before I'm being contacted?

I think it’s better that she contact you soonest so that you can agree a plan of how often / if you want to have any contact, what you want to be kept updated about.

I appreciate work stress must be high if speaking to her sent you into a ‘tailspin’ so you can ask that any contact is with HR or another manager while you’re off.

You may well need to be in touch with someone again if your fit note is extended, or if you need to discuss the shape of a phased return back. Is there anything you can do to prepare, to stop that being so stressful?

I disagree that they need to contact you/ can do it whenever.

In my own experience many years ago, the phone calls were triggering for my anxiety. I worked with occupational therapy and we agreed on an arrangement where the LM would call on a set day/ time, so I had it like an appointment. I was off for a prolonged period of time with depression and the cadence for me was once per month. I didn't want them to call any more regularly and certainly not without prior notice of when that would be

@LazyArsedMagician I found it easier to send emails (and you have the benefit of a paper trail should you need it). I would say that the calls out of the blue exacerbate your condition and you would prefer to set a regular time that your comfortable with. Work with occupational health if you have that option or get your GP to help with the reasonable adjustments that need to be in place for checking on you. Whether a weekly email from you would suffice with a fortnightly/ monthly call.

Ok thank you all.

Part of the "off sick" reasoning is that the anxieties are really stopping my rational thinking.

I'm with you OP. Having been off on long term sick myself and as a line manager managing someone off sick, I would not have expected a call or have made a call just a few days later. I'd actually find a message more appropriate in the first instance to arrange a welfare/check in call at a later date. Say at a fortnight. And then again a couple of days before you're due back in.

It’s perfectly normal and reasonable to contact an employee who is off sick.

That’s generally done in the first day or two, so it being left to today if you notified them on Tuesday is a bit slow if anything. (Im assuming that you haven’t actually had a conversation with your line manager about this prior to them calling? If you spoke when you informed them you were going off sick then this is a fairly rapid follow up for a long term sick note. But for a first contact it’s fairly late.

It sounds like might have unrealistic expectations of sick leave. It’s not a magic shield that protects you from all interactions with work. It says you’re not fit to be working. Best practise is for return to work planning to start by an employer as soon as a person goes off sick.

She is just doing her job checking in with you. It's not her fault you can't cope with a simple phone call.

Thanks for this. That's exactly what it is for me too. I'm waiting for Oc Health to contact me but expect that'll be next week some time now.

Check your policy but ours encourages managers to make early contact and check in regularly. They may be able to signpost to support or private health services etc.

Yes, but someone had to contact you to set up the occ health referral. That would usually be the manager unless you’d sent a request alongside your fit note for it not to be.

This is normal, OP, and you found it upsetting. Both things can be true. Hopefully you’ll have a useful discussion with Occ Health. Be prepared that you will need to discuss any recommendations they make with work once you’re back/as you prepare to come back.

Moving forward ask for any calls to be scheduled in so you know when they'll be. It's perfectly reasonable to put this in email.

Oh dear OP. I just want to send sympathies as I remember that feeling of stress and anxiety. I was you earlier this year. The sertraline is helping

How unpleasant.

This website is full of empathy lacking posters who really just enjoying making people feel worse about themselves.

you’ve got work related anxiety and work are calling you without notifying you. How you’re feeling is totally normal OP.

That's not pleasant, as it shames the OP.

I think your LM might have been better to send an email to set up a scheduled phone call.

Exactly
I’ve suffered from anxiety so intense I can’t answer the phone to my own children, never mind work
where I’ve had to cut ANY form of communication because i literally could not cope with anything other than trying to battle the desire to commit suicide
such ignorance

Thank you, I do appreciate this.

This time maybe 18 months ago, I wouldn't have been able to relate to the way I'm feeling right now at all. Now? That poster might have been mean, but they are right - I can't cope with an out of the blue phone call right now, and I don't know how to deal with that.

My doctor offered to sign me off in June, I said I couldn't leave my team in the lurch - that was a bad call on my part because I'm so much worse than I was then. I'm a bag of jangling nerves.

It’s probably their policy to reach out, keep in touch etc which is totally normal and expected. If I was you & you knew unexpected calls are tricky then I’d send your manager an email just to let them know you would prefer to keep in touch via text/email, or for calls to be arranged in advance.

I’m a line manager and we’ve recently been reminded to call direct reports when they are off sick, rather than rely on emails or texts. It’s because we have a duty of care to our employees, nothing more sinister than that.

I’m surprised your doctor wanted to sign you off until June next year. Such a long absence would make the situation worse, not better. What would change in over 6 months not being at work?