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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that trick or treating should be confined to your own street or friends/family

407 replies

Moonnstars · 31/10/2025 12:31

Showing my age here, but I remember when I was younger firstly trick or treating wasn't really a thing, but even when it started to become popular it was only your friends and family you called in on. I remember visiting my grandparents and their neighbours (who had been prepared so had sweets in) and then doing the same with my friends family.
Now it seems that people are asking where is the best street to visit, and I even saw today on social media someone saying they are on holiday in the area and where is best to go, happy to drive around to find the best places!

I have my own children who will be out, but we stick to our own street. I also have sweets in to give out, but am I being unreasonable in thinking I shouldn't have to have enough in to supply people coming over from different places and that it should just be people you know or at least living in the same street you hand stuff out to.

Also I do acknowledge some people go all out and advertise their address and want people to visit - however these are often for charity and as for a donation.

YABU - stop being so tight and buy more sweets

YANBU - it is getting out of hand, people should only go to people they know/stay local

OP posts:
Octavia64 · 31/10/2025 12:32

I’m 47.

trick or treating was a thing when I was young.

the almost universal code these days is pumpkin out - taking part, no pumpkin don’t knock.

i’m all decorated and have lots of sweets and looking forward to all the costumes!

Bambamhoohoo · 31/10/2025 12:33

Of course not 😂 what are you even on about? Don’t you realise some people actually enjoy Halloween and decorating their house for trick or treaters? What a miz attitude

sillyme1234 · 31/10/2025 12:34

I find it a bit weird parents accepting sweets from strangers.

However I will be leaving a bowl of sweets out to the local children. No doubt they won't ration.

I've got a few planned with neighbours to visit and they send me a message on the way

CheeseWisely · 31/10/2025 12:34

Our local area has an online map that people can choose to add themselves to if they’re open to trick or treaters. What about kids who live rurally or in a block of flats where neighbours don’t want to take part? No fun for them if your rules mean they have to stick to their immediate area!

StrawberryThief1930 · 31/10/2025 12:35

i agree. stick to your own local area or neighbouring roads.

i live in a holiday area and ive seen 2 messages this morning from holiday makers asking which roads to go trick or treating in! doesn't seem right to me.

Weirdest · 31/10/2025 12:35

I think trick or treat is more of an American thing, it always seems naff in England. But I totally remember random kids knocking on the door when I was a child, so I assume that’s the done thing.

Bumdrops · 31/10/2025 12:36

Neither of your poll responses fit -
no need to buy more treats
just buy what you want and when you’ve run out, pumpkin 🎃 comes in -
Can’t police if people are straying off their road ! For that idea - YABU

mindutopia · 31/10/2025 12:36

But people who give out sweets do it because they enjoy it. We live where we get no one sadly as have no neighbours. But when we did, I loved it. It would be sad to have 5 children come and then that’s it. It’s not often actually that people get out and actually speak to their neighbours (or anyone from the next village over).

If you don’t want to take part, you don’t have to, but it’s lovely to have fun and I don’t need anyone to live within a 1 mile radius for that. We drive chocolate out to the end of our drive (live down a muddy farm track) and leave it for anyone driving past. 🤷🏻‍♀️

FluffMagnet · 31/10/2025 12:36

We are right out in the sticks with no nearby neighbours. Friends invite us over each year to go Trick or Treating in their village (which is pretty into Halloween and operates on the pumpkin light system), and we take sweets to leave on their doorstep as payback to the village.

SpinningaCompass · 31/10/2025 12:38

Don't participate if you don't want to.

But not far from here are streets of seriously deprived children and a lot of poor behaviour in the area. I know, I teach in the primary school. I'd rather they came to neighbourhoods and streets like mine, and many will, where they can be safe and get some treats. Most of them are good kids; it's not their fault they live there.

CaveMum · 31/10/2025 12:38

We live in a small village, our street has 8 houses in it and the nearest family are 50 miles away!

A 10 min drive away is a small town where a high percentage of US Service families live due to a local USAF Base. They go all out with decorating their houses and handing out the US sweets - the kids love going there!

OriginalUsername2 · 31/10/2025 12:39

What do they mean by the best places to go? Roads with lots of decorated houses for the kids to enjoy or houses where people are giving out full sized Mars Bars? 🤔

ShesTheAlbatross · 31/10/2025 12:40

I think as long as people stick to houses with decorations/pumpkins, it’s fine. I wouldn’t decorate my house for trick or treaters but only want children from my street to come.

thisfilmisboring123 · 31/10/2025 12:40

Why do you have to buy more?
Buy what you want, when you’ve run out - don’t answer the door. Simple.

If they’re on holiday, where are they supposed to go?

mondaytosunday · 31/10/2025 12:42

Well we have no family nearby and my kids didn’t go to the local school so only knew our direct neighbours- and neither were particularly friendly! Now I live within walking distance of three primaries and I had about 200 kids last year. I’m about to carve the pumpkin and I’ve got some light up ghosts to put out. Two hours of constant getting up to answer the door but the delight on these kids, the effort put in to their costumes it’s a small price to pay! I lived it as a child and happy to participate now. I am a bit dismayed with friends who, once their own kids had aged out of trick or treating don’t do it. It’s going to be a damp one tonight though!

Original poster
Moonnstars · 31/10/2025 12:42

Thanks all for the replies, sounds like I am being a bit miserable 😂

I agree for those living further out then going to a nearby street is fine, but it's people driving around from one area to another that gets me, and sadly it usually is to try and get a bigger haul rather than looking at decorations.

I will be handing out sweets to whoever knocks while I have some in, but I guess I feel bad if you have several groups visiting from other parts of town that are the first to arrive they get them and then the children who actually live on the street miss out.

It just in some cases again feels parent led with parents wanting to take their children to get more goodies.

OP posts:
Zov · 31/10/2025 12:42

I think YABU, because I live in a middle class rural village with only about 60 children, and they are really well behaved, and it's a joy to see their wonderful outfits.

But when I lived in a cul de sac of private homes (44 in total) some 15 years ago, there was a big estate some 10-12 minutes walk away,) and we got some really dreadful kids coming around. Some as old as 17-20! And they'd kick stuff around in the front garden, and vandalise stuff if someone didn't answer the door!

It depends where you live really.

Notmyreality · 31/10/2025 12:42

What a load of rubbish. You go as far as you want. What do you want - a law debated in Parliament?
And we were tricked or treating in the 80s so I don’t now what you are on about.
We spent years in America where obviously Halloween is a big thing and the whole thing was fantastic as bringing the community together, meeting neighbours you don’t normally speak to. Quite frankly the polar opposite of the utterly miserable attitude in the UK.

HangryBlueCritic · 31/10/2025 12:43

Nah when mine were little they loved running all over the village/estate seeing as many decorated houses as they could. Not so much in recent years but back then there seemed to be hundreds of kids out with family on the night and there was a real buzz. My youngest always says his favourite memories are Halloween and he’s a hulking teen these days.

we didn’t buy enough sweets for the masses and just popped a sign out when everything was gone. No big deal.

surreygirly · 31/10/2025 12:43

No interest at all in the American nonsense
The only winners are the shops selling rubbish

Sirzy · 31/10/2025 12:43

If a house is decorated then it’s seen as an invite for anyone trick or treating.

If a house is in darkness then leave them alone.

Ladybugheart · 31/10/2025 12:43

There's 3 houses on my street so I think we'll go further afield 🤣🤣

Bagsintheboot · 31/10/2025 12:44

I do think it's a bit much to start driving to other towns or areas to do it.

Doesn't really feel in the spirit (ha) for others to descend en-masse to "good" streets, meaning the kids that actually live in those streets miss out.

I think it's better to stay in your own area. If your area doesn't do much for Halloween, well, be the change you want to see in the world as the saying goes.

Original poster
Moonnstars · 31/10/2025 12:45

thisfilmisboring123 · 31/10/2025 12:40

Why do you have to buy more?
Buy what you want, when you’ve run out - don’t answer the door. Simple.

If they’re on holiday, where are they supposed to go?

I guess if they are lucky enough to have been taken on holiday then I feel that their parents should be giving them sweets or whatever.

Maybe I just feel weird about the whole thing going round asking for sweets anyway. I wouldn't stop my children doing it, but overall it is a weird event knocking on strangers doors just because they have a pumpkin out assuming they are safe and what they give you is ok.

OP posts:
Chesticles · 31/10/2025 12:45

I am conflicted by this every year. about 10 years ago my street was very into halloween. We all decorated, and there was lots of local kids coming round. However about 5 years ago it got too much, there were people coming from miles, literally minibuses of them. I was giving out hundreds of sweets, (funsize mars bars) and I counted afterwards one year I gave out 180. It was actually unpleasant as there was just a constant queue at the door, and about 50% of people didn't even say thanks, or have a joke or anything. I ended up feeling a bit mugged.

I've given up now. My kids are older, as are a lot of the other kids in the street. However I feel sad for the younger kids in the street as they don't get to experience the fun my kids had. I feel a bit of a grinch, do I really begrudge giving kids sweets? But when it stops being fun, and is just a chore for me, then yes I do. Its lights out at mine tonight.