Bed Wetting Dilemma

[Anxiousmother23]

My 7 year old DS is still in pulls ups at night time.

We’ve not made a big deal out of it, we’ve just made sure he has two wees before bed and stop water after 6pm except just a sip to wet his mouth if needed. Some nights he wakes up totally dry, but the last week or so he’s been taking the pull up off in the night, therefore waking up soaked - this morning it was his pjs, the duvet cover and duvet itself plus the sheet. The pull up is completely dry.
He's never done this before, when we asked him he said he can’t remember doing it.

He is awaiting an ASD and ADHD assessment, so I know it can sometimes be linked to incontinence issues and later bed wetting.

Can anyone help us with a solution? All the stuff online is about babies and toddlers taking off the nappies at night, putting them in full body sleep suits etc.

Bumping for help

Can you lift him for a wee when you go to bed? Possibly dont withold water though

Presumably you've been to the GP? My friends daughter was still wetting the bed at that age, and it turned out she had a problem with one of her kidneys. The GP will refer you to the relevant department, you can get alarms etc that detect when theyre starting to go that will wake them up. Is he a really deep sleeper? I think my friend was told not to limit water early, can't remember the reason why though.

So in the night he has got up, taken off his pjs, taken off the pull ups, put his pjs back on and got back into bed. And doesn’t remember any of it?
Has it happened before or since?

My DS was a similar age. Our GP put us on to the school nursing team.

We had to do bigger drinks in the day with meals, so a big glass full with each meal and drink relatively quickly, like you would a tea or a coffee. Not have bottles of water sitting around for easy access. Aim was to fill the bladder, stretch the bladder so he would learn when he was full and go for a wee but gradually with longer in between meaning he'd gradually manage a night.

No red or dark drinks. No blackcurrant juice for example, no fizzy drinks. Water or weak orange squash.

We were advised to drop the pull ups after a week of big drinks as they absorb the liquid and they don't realize they are wet gradually triggering the need to get up.

We had a waterproof sheet and then a bedsheets and then repeat so if he wet in the night it was quicker to strip the bed and get straight back in. Same with a duvet, had a spare made up ready. Lots of washing but no fuss. They can't help it. Takes patience and time. Good luck.

You can find a lot of helpful information on the Eric website. Below is a link to their page of information about night time wetting.
https://eric.org.uk/advice-for-children-with-night-time-wetting/

My son used to wet up until age 7 or 8 and in the later stages he used a bedwetting alarm. It takes a lot of patience and perseverance, from both child and parents, but eventually after around 8 weeks I think it was the alarm which helped him turn the corner.

He didn't have any overnight trips/sleepovers planned, but if he did I might have considered Vasopressin medication. It can't 'cure' bedwetting but, I believe, can be used to create a couple of dry nights for such an occasion.

My son is exactly the same - also 7, and had an ASD and ADHD diagnosis. We were advised by the GP to give it another year and tackle it next summer when he'll be almost 8.

I did speak to the GP and they said they can’t do anything until he’s 8. He only just turned 7 last week.

He drinks quite a lot during the day - he has a water bottle that he has access to constantly if he needs it.

I’ve heard it can be genetic and my brother was wet later than ‘normal’. He was wearing pull ups to bed until he was about 6.

I’m just frustrated in not knowing how to get him to keep his pull up and pj bottoms on.
Him doing this is a fairly new thing…

He does have some totally dry nights, but we’re not doing anything differently. It’s very strange.

My daughter was late to get dry overnight, even though she was quick to get dry during the day. When she had a day where she had to get up early, she was dry, but on days where she’d get up at her standard time, she was wet. So it was like she could make it through to 6am but not 7:30-8? We spoke to her about it and she was adamant she was weeing in the night and waking up wet without realising, no awareness at all.

Then her cousin (5 years younger than her) got dry during the night and my daughter overheard a conversation about it.

Suddenly my daughter was dry overnight, zero accidents.

A couple of years after, it came up in conversation and she admitted she’d wake up each day and need a big wee but couldn’t be bothered to get out of bed to do it, so she weed in her pants because she didn’t have to move and it would absorb everything.

So I genuinely think she was dry a bit later than the average child biologically, but ended up a lot later than average in reality because of a choice she made.
In your case, I would seriously be questioning the fact he can get up, undress, and then get dressed again with zero recollection. That does seem odd to me. I totally believed my daughter at the time, when she said she didn’t realise, so I can see why you’d believe your son too. I was shocked when she admitted she’d had control all this time!

With your son, I wonder if he’s nearly there with control, but choosing to take the pull ups off and not wanting to tell anyone?

I don’t think he actually got up and got undressed, I think he pulled his pj bottoms off in the night and the pull up too while he was half asleep and felt uncomfortable/warm.
That’s why I think the bedding was wet but his pull up was dry.

He’s a deep sleeper too which doesn’t help.

It could be that he’s just choosing to take them off, but he has got some control as you said.

It’s perfectly within the normal range at that age. My DS finally slept through at about 7.5yrs but he was daytime dry at 3.

Both my son's wet the bed til they were 10 so I had 16 yesrs of it. in the end I resorted to sleeping bags and cheap mattresses. The mattresses could be replaced and I didn't have to wash a full load of bedding everyday just the 1 sleeping bag.

A sleep alarm worked for my son at this age, first couple of nights were hard work but he was totally dry by 2 weeks of use. Totally dry after that without it.

At around that age we got desmopressin from the GP. He took until he was about 11. DS2 is 4 years younger so when DS2 gave up night nappies at age 3, DS1 really did not want still to be wearing them. We tried the alarm, he slept too deeply for it to work. Not sure why need to be 8 to take the medication?

Our boy (also autistic & ADHD) was not reliably dry at night until he was 9, and had refused to wear night pull ups after the age of 7. He had accidents occasionally after turning 9, but they were related to anxiety about return to school after holidays. He also cannot get back to sleep easily without co-regulation, so that made/makes for a lot of broken sleep for us.

As a PP mentioned, the ERIC site has some good info if you have not already checked it out.

We had matress protectors and just changed the protector/sheets/duvet etc. It was a lot of work, and our child would get upset that he had wet the bed. Was a case of staying calm, getting him and the bed changed (and also washcloth wipe of his skin so that the urine did not cause irritation - which he found difficult due to sensory issues). We also got him up for a last wee before we went to bed, which did sometimes make a difference, but entailed waking/getting him back to sleep, so not without cost.

It was a very hard phase that I am really glad has resolved itself. My child has sensory integration difficulties, including interoception challenges. This is the sense that tells us we are hungry, thirsty, need the loo etc, but it is also key to recognising emotions. There are ways to train interoception, but it is not quick or easy - you can get info on this by searching under 'Sensory OT Interoception'.

Good luck - it does get better eventually!