Am I a laughing stock?

[CovidHeadache]

I jokingly call my house “surname towers” so for example if my surname was Jackson, my house would be called Jackson Towers. I’ve called it this for years, it’s very very lighthearted as I’m sure everyone knows. We host a lot of social events and I use the name in invites for example “birthday party, Jackson towers”, “Strictly finale party, Jackson towers” etc
In Christmas/birthday cards “love from A, L and all at Jackson towers”

All my friends and family know I call the house this and some call it this name too either in replies or just in general.

Anyway, last night I’d popped to my mums and my sister was there, we were talking about taking the kids to a Halloween event tonight and I said “why don’t you bring them back to the towers afterward and we can have a little party?”

My sister then said “I’m sorry but can we stop with this towers bullshit, it’s so cringy”. I said “It’s a joke! And you’ve never complained before!” My mum then said “not to your face maybe”. They both started laughing and my sister then said “no I’m sorry, someone needs to say something, people have been ripping the piss out of you for years for it, just give it a rest now”.

so to cut a long story short, turns out almost my entire family have been slagging me off for it for years and my sister hinted that my friends have too.

When I got home I rang my friend and asked her if the towers name annoys her and she said “no course not” so I asked if she knew if it annoyed anyone else to which she hesitated and then said “not annoy as such”. She wouldn’t elaborate further.

Now I’m pretty thick skinned and can mostly laugh it off if I’ve been a dick but this time I’m a bit upset, I keep trying to tell myself I’m not bothered but I can’t stop thinking about it. Have I been a laughing stock for years? If so AIBU to think someone might have mentioned it before now?

I think I'd be doubling down and very much continue using it. I'd expect a trusted family member to sensitively tell me much earlier if I was doing something a bit odd/something open to ridicule so I could decide how I wanted to navigate, not wait years and then laugh at me and tell me everybody else thinks its stupid too. I'd be very disappointed in my family for this.

Lean into it OP! Go full on Lady @CovidHeadache Jackson, of Jackson Towers 😃

I never fail to be amazed that people would give so much thought to unimportant things. In this case, what you (clearly jokingly) call your house. Something that really is of no consequence to them at all.
And I think it’s very cruel of them to laugh and talk about you behind your back, too. Are they nasty and judgey about other things? I imagine they’re always keen to accept your hospitality, though.

YABU here, the towers thing is surely a lighthearted laugh at yourself too? Obviously people would have a little laugh at it and you can see it’s cringy? Why then take offence when someone points it out? Why would you give your house/family a silly title if not for a bit of a laugh?

So would I, but I’m fairly petty and childish, so I’d make it into even more of a thing just out of spite.

Ah, multi storey? Rename it “The car park”.

They sound nasty. It's a harmless habit.

Let me guess, you make more effort with your sister and mum then they do with you?

I would dial it right back.

If people are so cringed at being invited to Jackson Towers then they should be invited far less than they are.

Let them host the Halloween, you have a lovely time with your dc.

I like it, I don't find it cringey at all.
I certainly wouldn't think anything of this or even bring it up in conversation with other people.

Oh god I found myself with such bad second hand embarrassment reading that.

Completely agree.

I think you are fine but your sister and mum are being horrible.
I like your joke.

I find it quite funny op.

In the grand scheme of things what does it matter.

When I take ages answering the phone or the door, I will often say oh sorry, I was in the west wing and I give no shits what anyone thinks.

Crack on.

You've just reminded me of something @CovidHeadache - growing up we lived in a mid-terraced house in the town, as did most of my friends and family. One of my aunts married a farmer and so they lived in an obviously detached farmhouse surrounded by fields - we used to call it The Compound** (as in the Kennedy Compound). It was a light-hearted joke, but it definitely became an affectionate nickname - me & my cousins still call it that.

** we, as in my family including my aunt, uncle and cousins. We weren't making fun of them!

It's the sort of thing mean girls at high school would bitch about in the toilet.
It's more cringey that they haven't moved passed that stage in their life.

I definitely find it mildly amusing, not cringey. It’s self-deprecating, not showing-off.
But there are very few universally funny jokes. It’s natural really that not everyone would take the same way. The ones who don’t just don’t have the same sense of humour as you.
I’m guessing it’s basically spoiled now anyway. You’re never going to feel the same way about it. Although, if I were you, I would still use it for any invitations that are just for your mum and sister because otherwise they will think their mean-spirited remarks got to you.

I thought you called it that as a reference to Fawlty Towers (ie chaos and family mishaps), and thus being self deprecating … but if its because it’s a 3 storey town house, it kind of comes off as pretentious. I’d just take it on board and stop using it as whatever you meant by the joke has got lost over time.

They sound like a bunch of judgmental arses. Plus ones that have the advantage of your hospitality. Shame on them.
Continue now you know and style it out. You’re not a laughing stock. They are miserable bums.

@CovidHeadache It clearly started off as a joke and YANBU for thinking they should have said something much sooner, but now they have, just replace it with "come to ours" - it will take very little time for "Surname Towers" to be forgotten about and no, I don't think you're a laughing stock. In the grand scheme of life and the universe, it's actually quite trivial so don't worry about it OP.

I would start going overboard to really annoy people.
Get a hand carved wooden sign.
Make it your official address.
Start calling parts of your house, the East wing, the West Wing and the Parlour.
At this point you are going to either have to stop saying it or go all in. I would go all in.
Unless you actually have the largest house out of everyone you know and have been calling your house 'the towers' just to show off about your massive house??

The thing is, you said you were using it as a joke on here but it seems like you were using it seriously in real life. People clearly didn’t understand that you were doing so in a tongue in cheek manner, as you totally bought into it yourself.

Someone I am friends with on FB calls his house this too. It's never made me bat an eyelid tbh.

I know someone who called their house Moot Grange, cos it had no mortgage.

Now, that’s cringey!

I suspect they laugh at it in a fairly affectionate way but I think it’s probably best to phase it out now.

I live in a road with a number of similar houses, I’ll pretend its name is Oplarden Road. One neighbour has named their house Oplarden House. Which I think is weird, like they’re the Manor House or something and we’re their surrounding estate. Whereas the only estate in reality is a housing estate.

I think this. There's often a bit of siblings rivalry which mean that they are designed to find anythjng slightly wanky and take the piss.

For me, I would find it a bit twee but I don't find it half as annoying as people referring to their partner as Mr xxx, the other half, the better half, or some elaborate version of their name. As long as you don't do that as well I would just think it was mildly amusing 😁

I once read of a couple who moved to the UK from the Philippines, whose English language skills were not the best.

They had heard of the idea of smashing the couple's names together to make a house name in the 'Bevron' style and had a sign made. Unfortunately, their names were Constance and Dominic...

I suppose it could have been much worse if their names had been Sharon and Teddy