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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

*%:&^ perimenopause aka how to manage unpredictable periods?

40 replies

2cubesoficeandasliceoflime · 30/10/2025 06:23

I know Im lucky to have got to my age without experiencing any real period issues (other than awful period pains pre kids).

But Im asking for tips on how to manage unpredictable periods. I have no idea when they will happen. Sometimes I flood.

For the last few years my periods have been very light and short. Really, really sore breasts coming up to it though so I always knew. I had never flooded in my life.

For the last 6(?) months however my new routine seems to be no warning before 1 or 2 days of a blood then either that's it or sometimes a week or 2 later I have a really heavy period with no early warning system. 2 months ago I was on a train. No indications of anything before I got on but then I stood up several hours later and realised I had flooded. In light jeans obviously. I didnt have any idea when I got on the train. Getting off, I had to walk past a man who visible recoiled and gave me a disgusted look. Twat. As if I had any control over it.

Then this month, I had blood for 1 day a week ago then nothing but this morning I woke up and my bed looked like a scene from Carrie.

The 1 or 2 days of bleeding are a variation of what I had before so it's more that I now get the joy of an additional heavier period some months. I get 4 or 5 weeks between any bleeding so I don't think it counts as bleeding between periods.

OP posts:

unleashthebook · 30/10/2025 06:25

Mirena coil. Changed my life! My periods were all over the place - very unpredictable and so heavy at times, I once started flooding in an airport with no warning. Had the coil, couple of light periods then they stopped altogether!

Original poster

2cubesoficeandasliceoflime · 30/10/2025 06:42

unleashthebook · 30/10/2025 06:25

I have no idea how they work. Are they hormonal?

I used the pill for years and then had the implant for years. When I stopped using any hormonal contraception my mind "stilled" and I realised that the hormones had been making me feel a bit mad but Id been using them for decades so just thought that was me. It's kind of hard to explain but I just felt calmer. I'm never using hormonal contraception again.

My husband was most annoyed when I basically gave him the choice of condoms, abstinence or vasectomy. Apparently it was ok for me to deal with the side effects of hormones but boo hoo him having to wear a condom.

He eventually got the snip but made sure everyone knew the sacrifice and pain he had experienced. He actually said "you should be grateful I've taken one for the team" because he thought it was my responsibility to sort contraception including sterilisation. He's not normally a dick. Pun not intended.

OP posts:

MinnieMountain · 30/10/2025 06:45

No suggestions, but I hear you OP. I recently resorted to putting a waterproof sheet on my bed.

Sevenamcoffee · 30/10/2025 06:48

I got the Modena coil at this stage and it sorted me out. I never tolerated the pill but the coil didn’t have the same impact on my mood. I put some weight on around that time which could have been related but could have been other lifestyle things as well

Sevenamcoffee · 30/10/2025 06:48

*Mirena

AmayaBuzzbee · 30/10/2025 06:58

Period undies all the time. This way you won’t get caught short when it starts unexpectedly.

PersephoneParlormaid · 30/10/2025 07:00

I ended up with low ferritin so got the Mirena coil. Wish I’d got it years earlier, rather than put up with flooding.

Momknockingonmydoor · 30/10/2025 07:03

I also don't want to try hormones after the experience I had when I was in my 20s with rage and weird symptoms. I am even afraid of taking the norestirone to delay periods for holidays. Period undies sound like an idea but not sure how comfortable they are. I'm not looking forward to this part of my life as I'm sure it's coming. Sorry no actual helpful advice but I hear you x

Original poster

2cubesoficeandasliceoflime · 30/10/2025 07:13

I find period undies too bulky to wear every day. Plus (and I really hate to say it) unless you change them a few times a day, even if you are not bleeding, they smell a bit. I have Modibodi and do have to boil wash them or I find they smell even when not being used.

OP posts:

Original poster

2cubesoficeandasliceoflime · 30/10/2025 07:15

I will look into how the coil works.

OP posts:

CrabbyCat · 30/10/2025 07:31

Have you tried tranxemic acid? You can buy it over the counter now. It works really well for me at the moment at stopping flooding. I was also reluctant to have the coil because of past difficulties with hormonal contraception.

I use the WUKA heavy period ones, I tried Modibodi but found the WUKA ones held more. To get rid of the smell between uses, I do a first cold wash with Vanish powder and then a 2nd wash with normal washing liquid at 30.

Ionlymakejokestodistractmyself · 30/10/2025 07:33

unleashthebook · 30/10/2025 06:25

My periods weren't that heavy but were unpredictable and my PMT was off the scale.

Mirena got rid of the rage and the periods!

So liberating.

HelloCharming · 30/10/2025 07:33

I didn’t tolerate erase the pill well either. when I started with perimenopause (flooding spectacularly on holiday, looked like I’d killed a pig In The hotel bathroom and also having to sit on cardboard in the taxi to the airport)….i went to the gp and went on first hrt, which had newer hormones and was better than the pill. The progesterone part then started to make me v depressed so I got a Mirena. Honestly it’s been absolutely fine, it’s a small even dose of progesterone and I’m not even aware of it.

go to the gp, have an iron test as you could be anaemic , and talk about options.

themerchentofvenus · 30/10/2025 07:35

@2cubesoficeandasliceoflime another vote for the mirena coil!

My periods have near enough stopped completely with it. I get the odd bit of spotting but that's all.

NamelessNancy · 30/10/2025 07:39

I wish Mirena worked so well fo me. I went from heavy unpredictable periods to a constant light one. I was relieved to get it removed in the end. I know my experience of it was unusual though. Tranexamic acid is useful to reduce the heaviest days.

PauliesWalnuts · 30/10/2025 07:42

This took two years from my life until a work health check forced me to go to the GP. I was eventually diagnosed with adenomyosis, an polyp, and a small fibroid, along with severe anaemia. I’d previously had issues with hormonal contraception but was so desperate that I agreed to a Mirena which was fitted during a hysteroscopy. It’s changed my life and I have no issues, and no periods. So get checked out first.

Prior to that I had a large make up bag that came everywhere with me which contained knickers, period knickers, night time pads and tampax, wet wipes and a pair of black leggings. Had to rely on that several times.

flippertygibbet4 · 30/10/2025 08:16

unleashthebook · 30/10/2025 06:25

Agree. Mirena coil completely stopped my flooding, it's been fantastic. My periods are still unpredictable, I'm 49, but no flooding means it's far less of an issue. Go to your GP and ask about it, it's been great for me. Good luck xx

Tagyoureit · 30/10/2025 08:34

I have unpredictable periods but no where near as heavy periods as you but its so annoying that you can never predict when its coming. My periods were so regular before but I've had 3 periods this calendar year.

I used to be on the mirena coil before ttc dd. Once it was finally out of my system I felt like a huge cloud of anxiety, rage filled pms had been lifted of me. I wouldnt go back to that.

BringBackCatsEyes · 30/10/2025 08:43

You can wear a menstrual cup when not bleeding. That with a liner should give you protection for the unexpected.
I’ve had menopause and still use my cup when doing some sports as it helps with pelvic floor problems.

Rumors1 · 30/10/2025 09:07

I didn’t get on well with the combined pill but 2 years ago started getting very heavy painful periods. I started on a progesterone only pill and it’s amazing. Got rid of my anxiety and heart palpitations and no period for 2.5 years now.

Original poster

2cubesoficeandasliceoflime · 30/10/2025 11:23

Tagyoureit · 30/10/2025 08:34

I used to be on the mirena coil before ttc dd. Once it was finally out of my system I felt like a huge cloud of anxiety, rage filled pms had been lifted of me. I wouldnt go back to that.

That's what I'm scared of.
Over 16ish years, I used a couple of different pills (cant remember the details) and had an implant but it wasnt until I stopped using anything that I realised how it was affecting me. At the time I didnt think I had any side effects from them and definately wasnt expecting the calm that came a couple of weeks after stopping.

Im worried that a coil would make all that start again.

OP posts:

Tagyoureit · 30/10/2025 11:42

@2cubesoficeandasliceoflime and its a genuine concern, I get it so im not going back to it.

I think a chat with your gp would serve you well. I have no other suggestions but I do hope you find something that helps you.

Isobel201 · 30/10/2025 18:39

I just take an anti-inflammatory that lightens my periods. Generally first couple of days are rough and I use tena ladies pants, then after that they are manageable and I reduce down to using panty liners on top of my period knickers.

Chinsupmeloves · 30/10/2025 19:03

To add more names coil! Total game changer, no periods, no pmt hormones, bloody brilliant 👏 xxx

Zoec1975 · 30/10/2025 19:26

How long does it take for Mirena to settle things down? Thanks

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