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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this PDA is inappropriate

60 replies

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 10:23

I'm on a train with my 10 year old son and there is a couple across from us. We are in a row across one side of the carriage, facing the couple who are on the opposite side (in the style of the Tube but narrower so about 1.5 metres away). There is one other girl on their row on her phone. Just giving context for how close they are, or far, depending on your perspective.

Anyway, they keep kissing with lots of giggling and sloppy sound effects. They aren't properly snogging but we can hear the long slurpy sounds and the muffled laughter, even when we look away. They are around 30 and are speaking Spanish, so don't know how much English they speak, but my son said to me quietly 'that's disgusting' and I said 'I know' in response. Honestly it was so sloppy and it's one of my least favourite sounds.

The couple continued and I instinctively looked up without thinking and the man had his eyes open and was looking in our direction with a smile on his face, mid slurp. They kissed a few times more and my son sort of winced. Look, I think it's great they are in love and everything, I really do. I'm not a prude. But I think it's just a bit yuck to be creating such a performance of kissing right in front of a child. Am I being very naive here? Is this something that other people would be ok with? When I felt like they were doing to deliberately piss us off I felt really annoyed. If I was on my own I wouldn't care but my son feels uncomfortable and for reason that's making me really peeved!

Is it just me?

OP posts:
Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 10:36

She was just talking and he was obviously teasing her about something she said, and he starting kissing her while she was talking and they were both laughing. I can't block it out as they are right in front of me. The guy keeps kissing her head and face with the loudest 'schmmmwah' sound. It's just too much and is really annoying me! I'm very happily married and do all of the above with my husband but not in public 🤔 and not in front of our kids.

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TeaRoseTallulah · 28/10/2025 10:38

It's the joys of travelling on public transport. Your ds is 10, he'll find everything disgusting, I wouldn't give it much thought personally.

Now, if they were playing music on their phones that would enrage me!!

PinkyFlamingo · 28/10/2025 10:40

You aren't physically affectionate with your DH in front of your kids?

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 10:40

At 10 all PDA is disgusting

Can't you move seats?

WhatNoRaisins · 28/10/2025 10:41

I'd assume they were pissed which I admit doesn't help when you're in that situation trying to explain it to a 10 year old.

Jan039 · 28/10/2025 10:44

I can't get upset about people kissing, I think it's quite nice hat they're happy actually. Talking loudly on a phone or playing music are much, much worse IMO.

spicycats · 28/10/2025 10:44

Totally agree that slurpy kissing noises are disgusting

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 10:44

PinkyFlamingo · 28/10/2025 10:40

You aren't physically affectionate with your DH in front of your kids?

Yes of course I am but not on this level, not the constant semi snogging. There is a level of hugs and kisses that you do in front of your kids and a type you don't. The verging on foreplay types of kisses are different to what our kids see. We have a cuddle and a peck but hopefully my kids don't get the sense that I want to take dhs clothes off. My stop is 3 mins away!

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Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 10:45

I'm happy for their deep love, honestly. It's the noises.

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user1471538275 · 28/10/2025 10:49

There are many things in life that you need to studiously ignore.

They are doing nothing wrong BUT It is irritating and distracting.

Headphones on, nose in book/phone etc.

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 10:57

user1471538275 · 28/10/2025 10:49

There are many things in life that you need to studiously ignore.

They are doing nothing wrong BUT It is irritating and distracting.

Headphones on, nose in book/phone etc.

I tried! It was so constant and distracting. Anyway it's over!

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Starlight1984 · 28/10/2025 11:08

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 10:45

I'm happy for their deep love, honestly. It's the noises.

I think you're being ridiculous and a bit oversensitive. Your son is 10. He has seen couples kissing before.

The noise... Meh. You're on public transport. It's full of people making noise (on their phones on FaceTime / video call, listening to loud music, watching social media with no headphones in, having arguments...).

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 11:18

Starlight1984 · 28/10/2025 11:08

I think you're being ridiculous and a bit oversensitive. Your son is 10. He has seen couples kissing before.

The noise... Meh. You're on public transport. It's full of people making noise (on their phones on FaceTime / video call, listening to loud music, watching social media with no headphones in, having arguments...).

I wish it had have been full of noise!

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TeaRoseTallulah · 28/10/2025 11:19

I'd much prefer my kid to see proper display of affection rather than fake porn stuff.

spoonbillstretford · 28/10/2025 11:20

I find it all a bit of a performance for others and always have. Get a room.

I'd have to put headphones on as the noises would make me feel murderous.

Tomorrowtodaywhenever · 28/10/2025 11:20

I really dislike seeing other people slurpy snogging. I don't find it sexually wrong, but I just find it really disgusting with bodily fluids and teeth together😂

writingsonthewall · 28/10/2025 11:23

Yeah I would be like ugh at the noises too. Get a room

Greggsit · 28/10/2025 11:49

I wouldn't be impressed, but I don't think doing it in front of a 10 year old is doing anything wrong compared to doing it in front of adults.

Pleasegetmeacoffeesotired · 28/10/2025 11:54

Just stare at them intently, like you're enjoying watching them. They'll get uncomfortable and stop very quickly.

Dacatspjs · 28/10/2025 11:57

Just move. Im slightly concerned that you can hear it EVEN when you look away... Stop staring at them, it's rude

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 12:07

So they got off at the same stop as us and seem to be coming to the same place we are going to!

I think it's really sweet to see a loving and affectionate couple too. I don't like having to listen to borderline snogging for 50 minutes. It just all seemed very sloppy and beyond romantic. I think it should be taken seriously when a child tells you something makes them feel uncomfortable. As I said, my husband and I kiss and cuddle in front of the kids and they dont bat an eyelid, but it's never like that. I think my son sensed that their behaviour was a private thing that he wasn't meant to see. I felt the same.

Just to clarify for those in the back; I've no problem with happy couples showing affection in public but I do have a problem with almost an hour of slurpy, giddy, giggly pre-snog behaviour. Anyway, hopefully they aren't going we are going!

By the way, before anyone mentions it, I'm honestly just killing time chatting on mumsnet about this and know there are bigger problems in the world.

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Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 12:09

Dacatspjs · 28/10/2025 11:57

Just move. Im slightly concerned that you can hear it EVEN when you look away... Stop staring at them, it's rude

I did not stare at anyone! I lifted my eyes without thinking once, but the noisy kissing continued and was impossible to ignore as they were less than 2 metres from us in an otherwise empty carriage. Why are you concerned I could still hear it when I looked away? You hear with your ears.

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BallerinaRadio · 28/10/2025 12:11

He was 'looking in your direction mid slurp' 🥴

Greenflowering · 28/10/2025 12:11

Honestly I’m all for showing kids healthy happy relationships etc etc but the NOISE of slurpy kissing is just horrible. And to inflict that on others for more than a couple of minutes is frankly rude.

SnugglyJumpersMakeItBetter · 28/10/2025 12:15

Urgh, I think I've met them! Working as a holiday nanny in Spain about 8 years ago. They were at it in the baby pool. As you say, smirking at us while snogging and heavy-petting. Gruesome.