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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

The Cauliflower Cheese Conundrum

390 replies

Speckly · 27/10/2025 22:09

Earlier a friend I was out with asked me what we were having for dinner tonight. When I replied “Cauliflower cheese and crusty bread”, she said “With what?” When I told her that was our dinner she looked horrified and told me cauliflower cheese is a side dish. As kids we often had cauliflower cheese for our dinner (I’m early 50s) but I’m interested to know, is that weird? Husband and I usually have this as a main about once a month (not vegetarian btw). When I asked DH his views on the subject tonight, he said he enjoys it but that his family never really had it when he was young so he couldn’t comment. If it’s relevant at all, we live in Kent. So is it ok to eat cauliflower cheese as a main or should it only ever be served as a side dish?

YABU - Cauliflower cheese is a side dish. You need to jazz it up with some other stuff!

YANBU - Cauliflower cheese is a decent main course - ignore the haters.

OP posts:
NeverCouldGetTheHangOfThursdays · 28/10/2025 17:29

I usually serve it as a side dish but also love it on its own with crusty bread, so YANBU.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 28/10/2025 17:34

Main course to me. I grew up with a veggie dad though.
Side to DH.
DC don’t like it (weirdos).

DecemberPlusFebruary · 28/10/2025 17:36

Main dish. Protein, veg, carbs. Also v yummy.

ginasevern · 28/10/2025 17:41

I've often served it as a main but with chips. Cauliflower cheese and chips is the food of gods. Otherwise I think it would normally be viewed as a side dish. But why not with crusty bread instead of chips.

ShortColdandGrey · 28/10/2025 17:45

Speckly · 27/10/2025 22:09

Earlier a friend I was out with asked me what we were having for dinner tonight. When I replied “Cauliflower cheese and crusty bread”, she said “With what?” When I told her that was our dinner she looked horrified and told me cauliflower cheese is a side dish. As kids we often had cauliflower cheese for our dinner (I’m early 50s) but I’m interested to know, is that weird? Husband and I usually have this as a main about once a month (not vegetarian btw). When I asked DH his views on the subject tonight, he said he enjoys it but that his family never really had it when he was young so he couldn’t comment. If it’s relevant at all, we live in Kent. So is it ok to eat cauliflower cheese as a main or should it only ever be served as a side dish?

YABU - Cauliflower cheese is a side dish. You need to jazz it up with some other stuff!

YANBU - Cauliflower cheese is a decent main course - ignore the haters.

I have it exactly the same as you. Unfortunately I am the only that eats it so I don't get it very often.

Hadalifeonce · 28/10/2025 17:47

I do it with big chunks of ham, topped with caramelised onions and breadcrumbs as a main meal.

Calliopespa · 28/10/2025 17:56

DeanElderberry · 28/10/2025 16:55

Cauliflower cheese (or 'au gratin' in a lot of recipe books) was always a main meal. The idea of serving a vegetable in a cheese sauce with a roast seems weird in the extreme, and I suspect only started to happen (in the last 20, maybe 30 years) when buying it ready-made became possible. Before then we either served things cooked around the meat, or simply steamed or boiled vegetables dressed with a little butter.

It's a very well balanced meal, mostly vegetable, first class protein from the milk and cheese, and a little starch from the flour in the sauce and the crumb topping. If you need more ballast than that, mashed or baked potato, or bread, can provide it.

Meals where the main protein was cheese never used to be seen as unusual - macaroni cheese, cheese pudding, cheese soufflé - all much encouraged during WW2, but there in the pre-war cook books.

"Ballast!" 😂
That made me feel full just reading the word used that way!

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 28/10/2025 18:01

MasterBeth · 28/10/2025 08:51

"Discovered a recipe"?

It's cauliflower cheese with some pasta in it! Who needs a recipe for that?

Show quote history

In this house it’s a regular, known as ‘Cauli-Mac’.

HarryVanderspeigle · 28/10/2025 18:12

Oohh that sounds amazing! Now I want that for dinner. Never seen a pole at exactly 50/50 before, so clearly contentious!

EleanorReally · 28/10/2025 18:17

MasterBeth · 28/10/2025 08:51

"Discovered a recipe"?

It's cauliflower cheese with some pasta in it! Who needs a recipe for that?

Show quote history

well it is always good to discover other recipes

EleanorReally · 28/10/2025 18:19

Justcallmedaffodil · 28/10/2025 11:27

Always a side dish in our house. I feel it’s important for a main meal to be balanced and there’s not enough protein, or more importantly fibre, for it to be a main meal on its own.

i think cauliflower has plenty of fibre

LivingDeadGirlUK · 28/10/2025 18:19

Apparently when my Nan and Grandad were first married he was incredulous that dinner was cauliflower cheese, as dinner should have meat apparently. She pointed out he would need to get a better job if he wanted meat every night.

AmethystAnnotation · 28/10/2025 18:20

You need a third choice:

  • Cauliflower cheese is the ruination of cheese and cauliflower

I don't want the wretched gunk anywhere near my plate whether a side or a main.

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 28/10/2025 18:24

As a child we regularly had it for our tea on Saturdays, but it was as a light meal as we ate our main meal at lunch on weekends. For some reason mum served it with Ritz crackers!

Now I tend to have it with a baked potato as a main meal. Or occasionally if I’m attempting low carb, then I have it as a side with fish.

What I find odd is people having it as a side with their roast, and then putting gravy on it.

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 28/10/2025 18:34

Great thread OP - as reading through now I’m getting lots of ideas of other things to add to cauliflower cheese!

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 28/10/2025 18:42

manineed · 27/10/2025 23:00

my mum used to always do jacket potato, cauliflower cheese and peas as a meal.

I love it but I read an article by a pathologist that put me off it!

What did the article say ?

EleanorReally · 28/10/2025 18:50

i always make it with slivers of bacon, topped with tomatoes, baked in the oven, serve with fried potatoes or curly chips.
then family members are vegetarian so no bacon, but leek in its place and mozzarella on top - main meal - no way would i be bothered to make it to accompany a roast but if pressed, i would as i quite like a cheese sauce with gravy!

jackadoo · 28/10/2025 19:19

How can it be a main? That’s like having a bowl of broccoli or potatoes gratin.I know I’m in the minority here btw and also love cauliflower cheese.

Original poster
Speckly · 28/10/2025 19:38

MouseCheese87 · 28/10/2025 05:03

Side dish. It's not a well rounded meal, no protein. It's just cauliflower.

Cheese is the protein! Lots of cheese 🤣

OP posts:
GoodTwoShoes · 28/10/2025 19:39

I only ever had it as a main dish for school dinners. Never ate it at home and I've never cooked it.

Bluebunnylover · 28/10/2025 19:56

I grew up having cauliflower cheese as a side dish with roast dinner but now I eat more veg/vegan dinners I’ll definitely do it as a main. Thinking leeks as well with bread crumbs on top then grilled!

letshavetea · 28/10/2025 20:10

Love cauli cheese, served with a side of herb and garlic oven roasted tomatoes and baguette. Yummy!

Original poster
Speckly · 28/10/2025 20:42

I am completely amazed how many responses I’ve received but I’m still no nearer an answer! 🤣🤣🤣

OP posts:
notacooldad · 28/10/2025 20:44

I am completely amazed how many responses I’ve received but I’m still no nearer an answer!
You have though! Its whatever you want it to be!
I have it as both sometimes a side, sometimes a main.

sashh · 29/10/2025 05:22

HeddaGarbled · 28/10/2025 09:19

All of you saying it’s a main meal but then saying “with bacon” etc 😃

If you need to have it with meat or eggs or whatever to it, it’s not a main, is it?

Of course it is. Like you might have pigs in blankets with turkey or put lardons in a chicken casserole.

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