Ex won’t share government child benefit

[Girlmum2017]

Bit of a back story…left my ex due to him being abusive physically and mentally to me. Kids were primarily in my care after the split, due to his work schedule. I never wanted any money from him, because I didn’t want to rely on him and I also understood he needed to provide for our children. During this time I claimed the government child benefit which for our 2 girls was only about £200 a month.
a year after our separation he accuses me of being abusive to our kids (to avoid further questions…I was not abusive) and took them away from me & then claimed the child benefit for himself.

I took him to court and got the children back and the courts gave us a 50/50 child order. In a statement he wrote to the court (but not documented in the court order) he would share the child benefit with me 50/50 regardless of who had the children & when. A year after going to court he has still not shared a penny so I question him and he suggests a 60/40 split as he wants to get his finances in order. I say no it’s meant to be 50/50 and it’s for the children not him. He ignores me so I apply for the child benefit myself and tell him he is to cancel his claim and I will pay him each month. This has been going on for 6 months and still nothing. I am waiting for the gcb to process my claim but it all depends on him forgoing his claim.

for further context…. We each have our own things for the children…coats, shoes, school uniform that we separate pay for. I pay for my daughters music lessons. I am a single income household, he lives with his girlfriend (who works) and her child. We both work full time with equal paying jobs and own our own homes and cars. We have a financial order from the court that means we are financially independent from each other. It works out at only £100 a month but it’s still the principle of why should he get it all and I get no help for the kids.
Edit: I also have savings accounts I pay into monthly for the kids. He doesn’t agree with savings accounts so I doubt he’s set anything up for them since we separated.
am I being unreasonable????

I would claim for 1 child leaving him with the other.

Tried this but it still relies on him agreeing to not claim for 1 child which he’s not doing.

Who are they registered with for the doctor, dentist and school?

Both of us for school, him for dentist and doctors as he changed them when he took them from me.

HMRC are supposed to decide who gets the payments in the event of a dispute. Normally it would be allocated 1 child to each parent if there's 2 children.

Have you contacted them?:

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/benefits/child-benefit/child-benefit-appeals/challenging-a-child-benefit-decision-mandatory-reconsideration/

oooh thank you I’ll look into that!

I think I just wanted to vent and someone I was telling me I’m not being unreasonable and I’d carry on the battle/ I was being an honest unreasonable ex and I’d give up! Lol

There is a really popping thread here called something like 5050 cms child benefit counter claim. A woman claimed cms in a 5050 situation and the ex asked child benefit to give it to him instead and they gave one each per child. This is what they should do for you I assume, when they eventually reply to you?

If he is physically and mentally abusive man, then let’s never expect him to be fair, kind, agreeable or reasonable. Assume he’ll do the most selfish thing always and prepare yourself.
my ex is the same about savings - I’m proud I’ll be able to hand a chunk over to my son.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5294980-child-benefit-rival-claim-ex-partner-earning-loads

Heres a link to that thread. Itd be useful for you i think to read through

The only thing that stops me getting frustrated with the whole thing, is that I can say I 100% do this by myself for my kids. I know what he’s like and I don’t know why I think he would ever do the right thing.