Stuck in hotel room

[ThatFunnyRoseSnail]

Writing this whilst on holiday abroad, 3yo DS sleeping next to me whilst DH is downstairs enjoying the hotel entertainment with family and friends. MIL did offer to babysit whilst DH and I had a few drinks down at the bar catching up with old friends but she has never babysat before (although does spend a few hours every couple of weeks with her whilst DH is there). Just feel a bit down that i am always the default parent and whilst DH did offer to stay up in the room, it felt a bit like paying lip service to the idea rather than a genuine offer. I am probably just whining over nothing but this situation has happened on more than one occasion and its always me that’s expected to sacrifice the “fun” as DS just cannot say no to any type of socialising. I should mention DD is a bit poorly and keeps waking up hence why i’m reluctant to let MIL deal with it all.

Sorry dude this one is on you.

Text your bloke. Your kids asleep, ask if anyone's available to pop up so you can have a breather.

You’re being a martyr. You don’t get to complain and be taken seriously when you turned down two offers to avoid the situation you’re now in.

Your child knows his grandmother? You are 3 minutes away if a crisis occurs?? She offered you said no.
The child’s father also offered. Who cares if it was lip service to staying? Her offered. You said no.
You are upstairs alone because you chose to be so.
Next time say yes.

What did you want both of you sat upstairs? If your child was well id be downstairs with him as he's not I'd set up a rota......it's not like your an hour away. Maybe it's you who pushes dh away?

MIL offered to babysit.
DH offered to stay in the room.
Why make a martyr of yourself?

You are doing this to yourself.
you have turned down two options to be a martyr

You can't have it all ways. DH said he'd babysit - you said no. MIL offered - you said no.
It's wrong to then complain that you're the one left holding the baby when you won't let anyone else do it.
On holiday though, can't you be a bit more go with the flow? Put DC in a buggy and take them with you for the evening. Very normal thing to do when on holiday.

Just feel a bit down that i am always the default parent and whilst DH did offer to stay up in the room, it felt a bit like paying lip service to the idea rather than a genuine offer.

And this is how you end up default parent. He was fine to stay to look after his own child. You deciding that he didn’t offer genuinely enough, as if it’s some sort of contest you’re judging, rather than him being a parent parenting, is putting yourself in the role of main parent making all the decisions on what’s best. The two of you need to work on this together, as you’re just creating resentment when you should be a team. But that’s a discussion for when you get home. In the meantime, call him up, or take MIL up on her offer to babysit.

When we went on holiday with ours they slept in the push chair in the evening when out I didn't put them to bed. I never just stayed in the room with them there is no need

Two people offered to watch your child and you martyred yourself instead.

Text your husband saying you've had second thoughts, you'd like him to take over now.

2 members of the group offered to stay instead of you, how can you say you're the default parent here?!

You've put yourself in that situation. Next time, give them a chance.

🚨 Martyr Alert!!!🚨

Why can't he sleep in a buggy? Sorry but agree with PP you are being a total martyr here.

Not sure about that at all, there is absolutely no chance my 3 yo or my 2 yo will sleep in a pushchair. They haven't done so since they were around 1...
I think it's lucky in a way that your child does but it's not a given at all.

We have never stayed in a hotel room with sleeping children. One child can sleep in a buggy.
You didn’t even need to do that as your MiL offered to babysit. The only reason you’re stuck is because of you

Yeah I've never heard of sitting in a hotel room with a kid from 7 pm apart from on MN

My eldest didn't wither so she just stayed awake.

i have never and will never be prisoner in a hotel room to my kids. In their pjs in the pram asleep or having a late night before I go on holiday and forgo my evenings.

option 2 - accept the 2 offers you were given!

Another one here who has never sat in a hotel room with a sleeping child all evening.

And yes, op, you are being a complete martyr. You can’t complain about this situation when it’s completely down to your refusal to accept help.

You deserve it then. Two people offered you but you played the martyr and now whining. Exact definition of a martyr. Your child is asleep, so what possibly does your MIL need to do other than be there?

So you cut your nose off to spite your face then ? By acting like you was ok so stayed in hotel room then wanted sympathy yikes