Warning: this post may cause a little envy… but only a tiny bit 😏

[Flowerofdestiny]

Does anyone in their 50s actually exist who does nothing all day?

I feel a bit silly asking this, but I’ve been wondering…

Does anyone in their 50s exist whose kids are grown, who doesn’t work full-time, and literally has days completely free of obligations?

I’m genuinely curious: is it as boring as it sounds, or actually a little paradise?

I feel a bit nosy for asking, but I’d love honest answers 😅

I’m 56, I have 3 grown up DC, I don’t work. The last job I had was 4 hours per week and that was before Covid. I did similar work to that for years and before that I didn’t work as my DC were young.

I spend my days at the spa, cinema, meeting friends, seeing my elderly parent, eating out, costal walks, a little housework and cooking but not much and I travel really a lot too.

I've really noticed this - my mum retired early to potter, and I have colleagues older than her who seem ten years younger (I'm not talking about looks but attitude and mental energy and interest in the wider world, range of things to talk about etc.).

I’ve found the opposite, the women at my activity and hobby groups seem really healthy , youthful, energetic interesting to talk to and happy compared to a lot of similar aged women I know who are working full time, knackered and mentioning various health conditions and aches and pains.

I’m 64 and have been retired since I was 58. My interest in the wider world has not diminished and I’ve still got lots to talk about and have travelled loads since retiring. Your mum is not typical.

@MoonI have contributed to the tax system for 45+ years without complaint. “Sadly” reflects a general feeling of paying from a smaller fund. I am surprised that you felt I needed reprimanded. My only point in commenting was to point out that, despite excessive reporting to the contrary, most retirees with pensions are still financially active and contributing.

54, having to opt for ill health retirement due to cancer. NOT how I anticipated my life at all. I’m dreading it.

To be fair you're over ten years younger than my mum and you have only been retired six years. It certainly happened quite gradually and she was a lot more active socially (lots of meeting different still working friends for lunch and traveling around the county to catch up with her cousins and old friends she hasn't seen in a while, with visits in return too) in the first five years of retirement, which petered out slowly.
I have (part time) colleagues in their 70s who are so mentally agile (and physically in reasonable health too) who just seem so much younger.

My mum's world has gradually become really tiny in the last ten years - the pandemic did put that into fast forward, and she never really got back out there, so perhaps it's unique to her specific cohort. Hopefully it is an anomaly.

My dad is older and chose to keep working - again, part time on his own terms - well into his 70s (until he had some quite serious physical illness and couldn't any more). He was far easier to have a conversation with for a good decade just because he had more to talk about beyond gardening, weather and the dog...

I don't want to work full time past my mid 60s but I anticipate choosing to work part time (I already have a role in mind, which is quite common to do part time for ten years or so before fully retiring in my field, and has a lot of flexibility).

That's interesting - maybe it depends what their jobs are/ were.
I'm not taking about physical health or appearance, which is similar in my experience, but about mental energy and engagement with ideas and generally wanting to talk about more than pets, gardening, weather and (minor) health niggles.

I'm 58 and retired from teaching at 55 and have never been happier. I volunteer at my church on Mondays and Fridays and that gives shape to my week. I have no kids and do whatever takes my fancy. I'd recommend it.

I was working as a nanny after many years in Childcare (running preschools, NVQ Assessing, Preschool Development Worker and Teaching Assistant).
I have an ongoing heart issue and realised at 53 that I couldn’t look after other people’s precious children with the risk of having another heart attack or stroke in front of them. I was lucky to be in the position where my husbands salary was enough.
i ended up volunteering for a hospice charity a few days a week and enjoyed my hobbies in between supporting my family with childcare including assisting with foster children.
i have finished with the hospice and due to start volunteering in a primary school with the reading scheme.

i think having less stress has helped with my health issues. Its something that runs in my family and my brother was only 53, father 58 and grandfather 50 when they died.
i turned 65 yesterday so hoping to have a few more years without the stresses of full time employment!

1. To enjoy life — it’s not all about work, luckily!

1. Keep in mind that the thread was meant to highlight exceptions, not the rule, obviously.

I was asking @Timeforabitofpeacewhy she thought it was a "nudge thread" intended to nudge the population into certain behaviours though.

I do understand why individuals make the decision, but not why any shadowy force would be trying to nudge the population to towards this pattern (unless it was with ill intent).

Understood 😃 thanks

Financial Services Project Manager.

I agree, a few people i know who retired before 60 look so good, not tired and stressed any more, and have found time for activities that interest them, I can't wait to join them.
I hardly ever discuss work outside of work.
I talk about travel, hiking, books, films, people, random things that are happening at home, or on the news, future plans, science based interests, games etc, so much more interesting than talking about work, and I like my job.
I know few people who discuss work other than a quick, how's work, yeah ok thanks, then move on.

My original post said “Can’t wait to do whatever I want and contribute zero to the tax system for a good few years!”
Obviously as my ISA’s run out I’ll need to take more from my pension and start paying UK tax again.

Even if your pension is so small it is covered by your personal allowance, I can guarantee 'you contribute to the tax system'. The price of practically everything we buy includes 20% tax.

So even after paying income tax during a long career there is no escape.

It's not about talking about work but about having a much wider range of social contacts and experiences through work than if the same individual does not work. This probably only applies to people who work with other people and in the community or a large non office setting though. It's perfectly likely people doing technical or administrative stuff from their home office don't have this benefit of working.

It is true that I'm comparing people who work in healthcare and education and adjacent fields with people the same age whose lives revolve around the garden and walking the dog. I'm also particularly thinking of my mother who had a job which really gave her a broad view of life until she retired at 55, and who after a few vibrant and busy years stopped doing much, just pottered, and within a decade seemed a lot older (to talk to rather than to look at) than colleagues of mine her age...

I suspect there's a huge variety depending partly on what work the individual did before and probably more so on the settings they worked in, how fulfilling their work was and how much freedom their work gave them, and whether they could do fewer hours rather than it having to be full time or nothing.

I do think lots of people probably get a burst of enthusiasm and energy when they first early retire and wonder whether that lasts after the first years.

What would get to me would be the fact that things would never change (except for the worse with worsening health eventually) and eventually it might get very groundhog day...

And you still buy things, pay council tax, road tax, vat etc etc. Weird point of view that you have to work forever to contribute.

Work to live not live to work.

So true, although I could tutor/make resources as a side hustle. I really like doing the latter. But nobody will care about what you used to do once you retire!

Yes. I’m almost 54 and work twenty hours a week over three days. DC off at uni or self sufficient in grad jobs. No parents or elderly IL’s to run around after. Am retiring bang on 55 with DH after 37 years nursing and god willing can please ourselves 24/7 and travel even more. We’ve had seven foreign holidays this year alone. My days at home are fab. I don’t bore easily.

I did up until a year ago, I'm 50 and hadn't worked for almost 20 years. Then our circumstances changed suddenly (DH's business went bump) and we hit major financial problems so now I'm working 2 cleaning jobs to make ends meet.

It's been bloody hard but tbh I think I'm happier now than I was doing nothing, we were never exactly rolling in money so going out and doing fun stuff with my time wasn't really an option and gradually over the years I sort of disengaged with life in the outside world and became a bit of a recluse. It sounds ridiculous but I sort of feel like a proper person again now, I earn my own money, use public transport, talk to people at work and in shops on my way home and it makes me feel part of the world again. I've also lost 2 stone and am physically fitter than I've been in years as well as having better mental health.

I wouldn't go back to doing nothing I don't think, DH is retraining so I probably could in a few months time but the idea really doesn't appeal. I'm thinking I might retrain myself when the time is right, I'd like to do something that helps people although I'm not yet sure what!

You can make them change, I’m off to South Africa for three months staying in five different places in a few weeks time. I am going to have lots of new experiences, meet up with some friends and do stimulating activities. Life is only Groundhog Day if you lack imagination and let it be.
I have relatives with little money who are doing amazing things with their time so it’s not all about wealth either.

Oh wow amazing, I’m off there January for 3 mths. Enjoy! Happy to provide tips if needed. Been to SA too many times to count.

Thank you.