To love Paris and to think ‘Paris syndrome’ is a myth?

[BarbaraVineFan]

Currently coming to the end of a marvellous short break in Paris. I’ve been here lots of times and also lived here for a while when I was a child. In all this time (but especially this most recent holiday) I haven’t found any evidence of any of the accusations levelled against Paris. It’s not dirty- in fact, it seems notably cleaner than the last time I was here in approx 2009) and it isn’t enormously expensive, especially compared to London. What’s more, it’s often said that Parisians are rude, but the people I have met and interacted with have been without exception polite and courteous. Am i missing something? I would honestly live here again in a heartbeat. Does anyone else agree?

the fact its a living city and not a tourist destination,

Which European cities are not living cities?

I don’t get Paris and I’ve loved every other French city I’ve visited.

I’ve been about 3 times and I’ve just not clicked with it.

I can’t recall having a stand out meal, or a really fun time the way I have in other cities.

Add that to the stink of urine everywhere, the vile state of seemingly every toilet and the rats overrunning the parks it’s just not for me!

I would agree though I didn’t find the people there rude at all - most were very helpful!

OTOH I loved Bordeaux and Strasbourg, and would absolutely return.

I’ve always bought into this myth but to be fair I haven’t been to Paris for about two decades so maybe it’s not accurate. I really want to go back now and see.

I have been to Tokyo and found it surprisingly peaceful despite its size and population. The thing that most stands out to me from your post is the huge difference in how people board a train - the queuing system in Japan makes perfect sense, but I have never seen it anywhere else.

I mean, if you were expecting Emily in Paris and arrived to find a bustling, multiethnic contemporary city I can get how you'd be disappointed.

(I'd also think you were deeply stupid, mind you).

I love Paris, and I think it's getting better year on year.

I didn’t know either so I Googled it 🙂

I love Paris. I love its buzz and variety.

I used to live there and even after I left I often worked there for weeks at a time. But I think it is a tough city, not a romantic one. Parisians are rude - they really are. Not so much to me - I speak fluent French, but to tourists and clients who don't speak French, I notice they are brusque or ignore them. And I was flashed at so often and openly when I lived there in my early twenties.

It feels like a hard city. London is full of green spaces to take a breath - so many parks and squares. Paris is very paved in comparison. There are fewer shady places to breathe and unwind. Pavement cafes are all very well but the cost is eye-watering in comparison with London, in my experience. Last time I was there with DC was about 13 years ago and the drinks stand outside Musee d'Orsay was charging 5 Euros for a takeaway can of diet coke. I remember just coffee and a croissant each for the four of us in a cafe added up to £25 which felt like a lot 13 years ago, when coffee and croissant from Pret in UK still cost £2 a head.

I haven't been back since then but am going back soon and am looking forward to its elegance and beauty.

Have recently been to Athens which has some very seedy, very sketchy parts, is overwhelmed with graffiti and has very obvious social issues. Not much litter but the derelict buildings and graffiti more than make up for it.

Paris is much nicer, even with the occasional fag butt.

Well, yes, but E in P is a very recent (and utterly moronic) TV programme, while ‘Paris Syndrome’ long predates it. I mean, I first went to Paris in my late teens, fuelled on a diet of French films in which Daniel Auteuil has suave affairs with gorgeous leading ladies in gorgeous settings, or Cyrano de Bergerac quips in verse while duelling in exquisite interiors, but I loved Paris from the moment I set foot there, despite living in an unpicturesque backstreet in Montparnasse.

We must be living in different parts of London 🙃

I've been three times and my abiding memories are the near-universal smell of urine on the streets and its distinction as the only place where I've received antisemitic abuse. Not for me thanks!

I love Paris and have been many times.

Its a lot cleaner post Olympics so that is something that’s different now.

Like all really big cities though you could really really get it wrong.

Like if you went to London and just walked around Trafalgar Square area, down the Mall and then down Oxford St.

I think people hit the very centre of Paris and get walked out as it’s so large and then the areas around the river/very centre are quite barren and lacking in bars and restaurants in a way that Prague, Budapest etc aren’t. Obviously they are full of history and buildings and art galleries but it isn’t everyone’s bag.

Paris and Lisbon are cities we loved but totally feel you have to do a lot of research and hop around on public transport to really get the most out of them. In both we’ve been a bit like ‘so and so wouldn’t love this’

I love Paris, it's got a lot of what I like about NYC and most major world cities. I didn't find Parisians rude, they're busy and have things to do and places to be. I do speak decent French so that might be a factor. I enjoy my time there.

I have no clue what Paris Syndrome is.

Yes but they hate rudeness even more. Someone failing to say “bonjour Madame/Monsieur/etc” on entering a shop/resto etc is almost guaranteed to piss them off before they’ve even started demonstrating their French language skills, or lack of.

I’ve lived in Paris twice (and visited many times for both leisure and business when I wasn’t resident). I actually love Parisians (and the French in general) but they themselves openly admit that they can be utter dicks when they want to be. They’re quite proud of it. My French boss actually said to me when I first moved there last time “I’m horrible and I’m proud to be horrible”. And indeed he was for my first few months. 🙄And then he realised that my French is actually pretty good, that I’m not a complete Anglo-Saxon heathen (by French standards) and that I actually appreciate many things about French culture/lifestyle and know how to conduct myself, and I was “in”. He turned into one of the most loyal and supportive friends and colleagues that I could ever wish for. When my employer eventually decided that I had to move back to London he said “we will fight for you!!” We’re still friends. And he can still be a dick (he wouldn’t consider himself French if he wasn’t a dick occasionally). When I travel from London to his Paris home for dinner parties/etc with him and other former colleagues/friends, he always makes me blind taste the wine and guess what it is (so far I’ve got it right every time much to their surprise/delight). They like to test my “Frenchness” as they now consider me “almost French”. 🙄😂They were very suspicious about a cheeseboard of English cheeses I took over but ultimately proclaimed “they smell so bad they could be French!”, refused to let their children eat sausages from The Ginger Pig at Borough Market (didn’t trust that English food wouldn’t poison French children) and were very dubious about trying Nyetimber sparkling wine (concluding that “it’s better than bad French champagne”). They were utter arseholes to some of my expat friends that I tried introducing them to (huge mistake on my part!) because the expats didn’t fully appreciate/understand ‘the secret French rules’ (like the importance of saying bonjour when entering a shop!). Like I said, the Parisians can be dicks. But loveable dicks.

As for Paris itself, whenever I arrive off the Eurostar and head down into the metro, I also take a deep breath in and smell that unique mix of stale piss and burning rubber and think “yes, the smell of Paris, I’m back!!!”

As for Paris syndrome, I had to Google it. What a load of tosh.

We go to Paris every year and stay in the 4th arrondissement (the Marais). Lots of nice restaurants and shops and just across the Seine for Notre Dame. The Marais is still full of small streets and historical old buildings.

I am bias because I am from Paris. but thank you for your post, it fills my heart. Happy Friday!

I go every spring with my adult daughter. It is ‘our’ place and we absolutely love it. It is so easy to get to from London where we live. The only thing I would say, is that I prefer the tube to the Metro!

Yes but they hate rudeness even more. Someone failing to say “bonjour Madame/Monsieur/etc” on entering a shop/resto etc is almost guaranteed to piss them off before they’ve even started demonstrating their French language skills, or lack of.
Because being rude to people is such brilliant customer service!
As I say, I haven't been to France in years and this thread isn't making me want to go back.
I holiday in places where they know how to be nice to other human beings (mainly because they, themselves, are genuinely nice people).

Whilst I’m on here, I might do a mini hijack! We normally stay in the Marais or St-Germain. Should we be more adventurous and stay in a different area next year? I don’t really want to be near the Champs-Élysées and find the areas near sacre-coeur a bit seedy. But I would love any recommendations. Restaurants and cafes, some nice shops, and beautiful architecture. Though tbf that’s a lot of Paris covered I know!

My french is crap, but I make an effort every time. I do feel shame-faced when waiting staff respond in English but I still have a go! I don’t find people rude at all.

I love Paris. Went there for my honeymoon 35 years ago and been back loads. It will always be special to me.

Similarly I don’t understand people being underwhelmed by Venice, saying it smells etc. it is ridiculously beautiful, magical at night, and I’ve never found it smelly even though have only ever been there in summer.

Paris is awesome. If I lived in the South East of England and was able to get there by train in a few hours I’d be there all the time!

I enjoy spending time in most European cities though. Have had great holidays in Berlin, Amsterdam, Krakow among others. Also think London is great and am sad that circumstances meant I had to turn down an opportunity to work there.

I love Paris, and have done for about 35 years since the first time I went there as a teenager with my parents.

I've never found the stereotype about Parisian rudeness to be even remotely true. In general I've always found Parisians to be very charming, especially if you're willing to make the effort with a few words of French.

I think that, in general, big cities - especially capital cities - just overwhelm some people, especially if they're not used to them. I've heard people complain about Barcelona, New York, London and Rome for all the same reasons I've heard them complain about Paris, but it's nearly always people who aren't used to big cities and just find the pace and the noise, and the general vibe of people who live and work in that environment, a bit of a culture shock.

I think 'Paris Syndrome' was actually originally meant to refer specifically to Japanese tourists, which is understandable because the whole difference in culture and behaviour between Japan and France, especially Paris, is just huge and overwhelming. I think quite a lot of Europeans experience a similar feeling when they visit Tokyo.

I absolutely love and will always love Paris. My biggest mistake is not migrating there.

I don't love Paris, but don't hate it either, it's ok. Rather beautiful and no dirtier than any major city, IMO.

Parisians are fine, and I don't speak French. You 'Bonjour' them and they'll be civil enough. But tbh I dislike fake, overblown, superficial politeness and 'manners' with a pass-agg inner sighs of Brits and Japanese. Enough of the endless thank yous, pleases, might I trouble yous and other pointless yakking, just get to the goddamn point already. I much prefer E. Europe, Netherlands or Scandinavia in that regard.

And if someone watched that saccharine tripe on Netflix and expect Paris to be exactly like that, they need their heads examined.