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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Lending money to buy a house

70 replies

sicknessmedi · 23/10/2025 22:22

My mum has been served notice to move out of her home in London. I want her to move up north with me but she has limited savings and retired so no income.

Could I gift her the money to buy a home and she live there? Will the government make her sell her home if she goes into a care home?

OP posts:
Viviennemary · 24/10/2025 09:39

Jeschara · 23/10/2025 22:24

Could you put the house and mortgage in your name and can she love there and pay a fair rent and bills.

Then you will have to pay tax on the rental income. I dont think there is an easy way round this.

titchy · 24/10/2025 11:52

sicknessmedi · 23/10/2025 23:43

Hahaha

Why the fuck should I pay tax when I'm housing a citizen

Imagine if all landlords felt like that! What makes you a special sort of landlord who shouldn’t have to pay tax?

titchy · 24/10/2025 11:57

Howszaboutthat · 24/10/2025 08:37

I’m at a loss as to why people have turned this back on the OP as if she were some kind of money-laundering crook.

It’s a phenomenally kind thing to do to buy an elderly parent a house to live in. This comes at considerable personal cost to the OP(said funds could have been for their own retirement or their children’s house deposits).

Further, the OP is saving the taxpayer the cost of either providing social housing or housing benefit.

I’m kind of appalled that an elderly person hasn’t planned for the future, such that the adult has had to swoop in to save the day, but there you go. That’s how it seems to be. I couldn’t do that for my mother. I’ve still got hefty mortgage and also need to prioritise supporting my adult children.

OP please don’t write to the Telegraph with your lovely story lest a load of elderly mothers out there flap the article in our faces, eh?

Because OP’s priority seems to be to avoid paying tax and ensure the state pays for care costs, and it appears she won’t help her dm otherwise.

Howszaboutthat · 24/10/2025 14:09

titchy · 24/10/2025 11:57

Because OP’s priority seems to be to avoid paying tax and ensure the state pays for care costs, and it appears she won’t help her dm otherwise.

The state cannot force children to pay for their parents’ care, nor is it morally acceptable that children should pay for their parents’ care, even if they have the money. All that’s being asked about here is about financial planning, not tax evasion.

nomas · 24/10/2025 14:11

Do you have kids? Could you buy it in trust for them?

Might be worth seeing a financial advisor.

titchy · 24/10/2025 14:32

Howszaboutthat · 24/10/2025 14:09

The state cannot force children to pay for their parents’ care, nor is it morally acceptable that children should pay for their parents’ care, even if they have the money. All that’s being asked about here is about financial planning, not tax evasion.

I know that - as does OP, hence why she won’t put the proposed house into her dm’s name. Which is fair enough assuming her dm has no assets.

What isn’t fair is trying to avoid tax on the purchase of a second property in OP’s name.

You can’t have it both ways - either she gifts her dm as asset which will need selling to pay for care if needed, or she buys in her name and pays tax.

ToeJob · 24/10/2025 17:30

I’m at a loss as to why people have turned this back on the OP as if she were some kind of money-laundering crook.

It’s a phenomenally kind thing to do to buy an elderly parent a house to live in. Further, the OP is saving the taxpayer the cost of either providing social housing or housing benefit.

Well, I’m afraid there isn’t “I bought my mummy a house because I’m so lovely, and otherwise she’d have to go on housing bet, so it’s not faaairrr!!!” tax exemption. How would such a scheme work? Would people like the OP be forced to sell these houses when their parents died? How would this be enforced? Surely if there were some tax break when it came to selling a property as long as your parents had lived in it, wouldn’t lots of people just get their elderly parents to move in for a few months before they went into a care home? Who would keep track of whether the homes had been sold? And could this be done cheaply enough to avoid wiping out the apparently massive savings on housing benefit delivered?

People are unhappy with the OP because she wants it all ways, and is being pretty
vicious towards anyone who suggests she can’t or shouldn’t have that. She doesn’t want her mother to own the house and risk it being sold for care costs, but she also doesn’t want to own it herself and be taxed on its sale further down the line. She can’t have it both ways. But she thinks she’s special.

This comes at considerable personal cost to the OP(said funds could have been for their own retirement or their children’s house deposits).

Said funds still could be used that way. OP is likely to outlive her mother by decades; she could have a rental income from the property throughout her retirement. She could sell and reinvest the money elsewhere; she’d only be taxed on any profit. But she just wants to moan that she isn’t getting exactly what she wants.

Laura95167 · 24/10/2025 17:38

Frynye · 23/10/2025 22:23

Not if you buy the house in your name

But then you would be her landlord, have to do tax returns and may owe tax

Laura95167 · 24/10/2025 17:46

sicknessmedi · 23/10/2025 23:43

Hahaha

Why the fuck should I pay tax when I'm housing a citizen

If you by it outright, and your mum isn't giving you money as rent/board/a contribution you might be alright.

I say might because if she claimed housing elements of benefits it could get messy and you could get taxed then.

Basically if you get income, its subject to tax. So if she pays you or she claims benefits related to housing and paying (even if you let her keep it) youll to be prepared to pay tax.

Its not about "housing a citizen" its about we all get taxed on our income. If you get some income from a property, and you meet the threshold for tax of course you should pay it.

ToeJob · 24/10/2025 17:50

Laura95167 · 24/10/2025 17:38

But then you would be her landlord, have to do tax returns and may owe tax

Nothing to pay tax on if she isn’t charging her mother any rent.

Laura95167 · 24/10/2025 17:54

ToeJob · 24/10/2025 17:50

Nothing to pay tax on if she isn’t charging her mother any rent.

True thats an option

titchy · 24/10/2025 18:12

ToeJob · 24/10/2025 17:50

Nothing to pay tax on if she isn’t charging her mother any rent.

Other than the higher rate of stamp duty and CGT when she sells….

ToeJob · 24/10/2025 19:10

Those are separate issues though. I was responding to a point suggesting that buying the property in her own name involves charging rent and filing tax returns.

titchy · 24/10/2025 23:10

ToeJob · 24/10/2025 19:10

Those are separate issues though. I was responding to a point suggesting that buying the property in her own name involves charging rent and filing tax returns.

Your post said ‘NOTHING’ to pay tax on. Clearly that’s wrong. And kind of crucial to the point of the thread.

ToeJob · 25/10/2025 09:04

titchy · 24/10/2025 23:10

Your post said ‘NOTHING’ to pay tax on. Clearly that’s wrong. And kind of crucial to the point of the thread.

Read it again.

titchy · 25/10/2025 11:17

ToeJob · 25/10/2025 09:04

Read it again.

Confused You said ‘NOTHING to pay tax on if she isn’t charging her mother rent’.

Those are your words. Clearly there is tax to be paid even if she isn’t charging her rent.

thepariscrimefiles · 25/10/2025 16:30

ToeJob · 24/10/2025 17:50

Nothing to pay tax on if she isn’t charging her mother any rent.

Even if she doesn't charge her mother any rent, if she sells the property for more than she paid for it after her mum dies or goes into a care home, she will be liable for Capital Gains Tax.

WiddlinDiddlin · 25/10/2025 16:39

If you can afford to buy property out-right then it can be fairly simple:

Loan her the money, charge on the property such that if it is sold in the event of her leaving the property or dying, you get that loan amount back (be clear on the details here because if you put 50K in now and the small print says you get that exact sum back, thats a very different prospect to putting in 100% of the property value and recieving 100% of it back!)

Buy the property in your name, let her live there rent free.

You won't avoid ALL tax because obviously on selling it... you'll pay tax on that. But either of those options means if she needs to go into care, you don't lose out what you put in.

If you GIVE her either the money or the house, then thats hers and is viewed as her capital and can be used to pay for care if necessary. So don't do that.

ToeJob · 26/10/2025 01:03

thepariscrimefiles · 25/10/2025 16:30

Even if she doesn't charge her mother any rent, if she sells the property for more than she paid for it after her mum dies or goes into a care home, she will be liable for Capital Gains Tax.

Why are you saying this as if I don’t know?

ToeJob · 26/10/2025 01:03

titchy · 25/10/2025 11:17

Confused You said ‘NOTHING to pay tax on if she isn’t charging her mother rent’.

Those are your words. Clearly there is tax to be paid even if she isn’t charging her rent.

I think you’re a bit slow.

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