Need a virtual hand hold , husband vomiting blood

[Justmeeeindie]

Still frazzled so sorry if this is all over the place husband has been constipated for around 10 days doing usual things laxative tons of water lots of fibre , he went to a&e at my insistence on Tuesday early hours as he was awake all night crying in pain, I’ve never seen him in as much pain and vomiting profusely
he went to a&e waited 4 hours to be basically fobbed off , they felt his stomach said it was just constipation told him to continue laxatives at home .

today he woke up around 11 in agony he vomited it was dark like coffee which in retrospect should have been warning sign anyways he tried to get back to sleep then shouted me not much later from bathroom , he was vomiting loads of bright red blood (no exaggeration there was a lot) and passing in and out of consciousness eyes rolling the lot , he passed out atleast 8 times whilst I was on phone to the ambulance , he peed himself at one point .

I was terrified I’m still shaking ambulance came pretty fast(20mins ) but he’s been waiting in ambulances at a&e for over 2 hours now .

I'm stuck at home with the kids , there off school (hand foot and mouth ) thanks to the two year old .
I don’t know what to do right now , I genuinely though he was dying , he kept saying he was and I had to calm him down telling him he will be fine all the while thinking he was actually dying .

no idea yet what’s actually wrong but I’m thinking bowel blockage (which I suspected on Tuesday hence making him go to a&e) or ulcer .

don’t know purpose of this post just need to let it out , the waiting on update is torture .

Marvelousmonsters is in the money, I'd be asking the next specialist you see about exactly what she said, and also detailing it to PALS.

What good is money if he doesn’t survive this or survives but with reduced quality of life? OP you need to be more than a squeaky wheel here …

I agree with others, vomiting blood and fainting 8 times indicates something is wrong, I’d advocate for him and urgently speaks to pals.
This hospital sounds bloody terrible.

This is dreadful. I hope your husband is ok 🤞

This is awful I'm so sorry. You need to insist on making an appointment to speak to Consultant in charge.

OP sometimes you have to make a polite but absolute nuisance of yourself to get some action. A couple of years ago we visited a friend who had been admitted to hospital in severe pain (he had survived cancer two years previously) and was in a ward. His pain medication was four hours overdue and he’d asked several times and was clearly in a lot of pain. DH went up to the nurses station and asked when he would be getting his meds and the nurse said ‘I’ll get it in a minute’ which is what they’d been saying for hours. DH said ‘Ok thank you, I’m just going to wait here until he’s had it’ and stood next to the nurses station until it was given to him. He got it within about ten minutes. You have to make it clear you’re not going to be fobbed off and stand your ground.

Also to say that if our friend hadn’t been given the meds sharpish, DH was willing to escalate it there and then.

Sometimes they are understaffed, sadly sometimes no one cares enough.

As everyone else has said. In the nicest possible way, you have to advocate for your husband because he’s too ill to do it himself.

Get your eldest to look after your kids and get up there. Insist on speaking to the matron or nurse in charge - even the Chief Nursing Officer if need be.

I’m amazed he hasn’t had a CT scan or MRI. This would be the easiest way to see if there’s a blockage (which would seem apparent since he’s not had a bowel movement, despite laxatives). Morphine makes you constipated, so that’s not going to help.

Weekends are the worse to be in hospital as they’re running on skeleton staff, but they still haven’t staff for emergencies - which this appears to be.

We have recently had to step in to advocate for my mother in hospital. Inaction and general faffing would have killed her. You can make use of Martha’s law (urgent review for a second opinion) or put something in writing to the ward documenting concerns.

We have found that things have happened pretty quickly after we’ve complained in writing but nothing happens if we ask over a phone call.

I'm not a medical expert unfortunately, but I would say you need to get in there asap, advocate for him, ask questions (respectfully), keep asking questions, do as much research as you can, read the notes, keep on top of it. Until it has been diagnosed and treatment plan is organised there are many ways that things can slip through the net in a busy department with so many demands on the medics and nurses time. Good luck and I hope he makes a full recovery.

This must be horrendous for both of you. Definitely try to make some noise. Making him wait so long without food or medicine is appalling. I recently made a PALS complaint and tbh their "investigation" was useless but it did mean an appointment was magically produced, so worth trying to keep the pressure up.

Don't get me wrong, I love the NHS, but they're failing your DH here. 💐

So many fussing about him not getting food lol.
As long as he’s on a drip and painkillers he can be kept comfortable until they assess what the cause is. If it’s a bowel obstruction they may consider surgery if it doesn’t clear, so he needs to be nil by mouth.

Been in this situation a number of times. First four times, obstruction cleared. Last time, needed an emergency stoma. Morphine was a godsend.

OP what a complete nightmare. Is he getting any calories via drip, surely that should be possible?

As has been said, would be good if you could go and advocate, but at the same time, don't expect too much of yourself. Only you can judge whether or for how long you can put your eldest in charge.

And maladministered wards are a difficult beast to fight, all the more on a weekend. Don't try to fight windmills. Wishing you strength.

That is a saying meaning „has got it exactly right“ not anything about money.

OP this is shocking. Yes you are his advocate and they need to make sure that his endoscopy is today or tomorrow at latest. It is an almost an emergency and the longer he is in hospital the more it is costing them - which is also a KPI for a hospital (not your husband!). Yes. Keep notes of everything. This will be a whole PALs saga when this is over. I wish your husband, and you, all the best.

I’ve been on both sides of hospital incompetence which resulted in fatality. I dont mess around anymore. If I were you and didn’t get consultant contact this morning I’d be on to whomever is acting medical director this weekend and advocate in strongest possible terms for your loved one

OP, this can be serious but don't let them send him home. I have had two enormous stomach ulcers which needed internal stapling. They were caused by heliobacter pylori. One of them needed life saving treatment and I nearly died. It is awful but if caught early very recoverable!

He hadn’t eaten from about Tuesday really he’s been too ill since then to eat and wouldn’t have kept anything down he’s been been vomiting since before Tuesdays a&e visit (not blood until Thursday) .
He can eat now though finally.

Hes finally had endoscopy and it’s massive ulcer that’s bleeding into stomach still not sure what treatment they are going to do but he’s on omeprazole through iv for now and still getting morphine for the pain.
Also finally bowel movement (surprised since he wasn’t given anything for constipation but guess all the fluids have helped) it was black though so guessing blood from stomach .

Im going up to visit shortly so hopefully can find out more about what’s going on .

Glad you’re getting some answers. Wishing him a speedy recovery.

Fingers crossed they can get him stable and home to recover soon.

This all sounds positive. Not pleasant and terrifying at the time, but a lot better news that it might have been. Well done for advocating to keep him in hospital. Great that he’s been to the toilet now and is able to eat. He must feel a whole lot better than he did. Wishing him a speedy recovery xx

I thought it sounded like an ulcer. That's what my friend had. Can't believe they were prepared to send him home! Makes my blood boil it really does. Really hope he feels better soon.
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Glad to hear you have finally got a diagnosis.
I have had similar situations in the past.
A really good piece of advice given to me by a solicitor was to keep a diary of all conversations. Make it really obvious that you are writing everything down.Make notes of exactly who you are speaking to and what they said or did.Asking people to spell their surnames really focusses attention especially if you add that you may make a complaint to the CQC later if things don't improve.
You shouldn't have to, but unfortunately this is the state of the NHS at the moment

Poor thing, I’m glad he has had the endoscopy and they are now treating him. The prospect of being in pain/frightened and needing urgent medical help is seriously terrifying to me. I don’t know what the answer is or why things are so much worse than they used to be.

Great they’ve finally done this and you know. I know it’s not a now thing, but down the line please consider filing a complaint - they need to learn to recognise the signs and not discharge as the next patient may not be so fortunate

This is really good news! (believe it or not!).