Apart from work colleagues and my therapist for one hour, I won't see anyone this week

[buildingsites]

I live alone and this week I haven't had proper interactions with anyone other than colleagues at work (in an office largely computer-based job) and my hour long counselling appointment. Other than being at the supermarket etc, I haven't seen anyone else since Sunday and won't see anyone until this Sunday. I don't feel particularly personally known at work and I manage a team so it's not like I can be friends with them and get my tank filled that way.
I don't have any family. Friends are all busy with their families and/or haven't got back to me yet with a date for when they're free for a catch up. This is a picture of how most weeks can be for me. I'm so lonely and yet I feel ashamed to admit it to anyone. I feel low this week and I'm struggling to concentrate on my work.

What are your hobbies op?

Time to look into joining local clubs.

join your local meet up group

Hobbies are the way forward - I've just turned down a coffee catch up tomorrow as I have to work (on my day off!) with a friend who I met through another friend who I met through my writing group - concentric circles! I will probably hibernate this weekend but then I have my scriptwriters workshop on Monday night and then Open Mic on Thursday... all of this from one hobby.

I'm sorry OP. I used to hate the weekends when I was single. So very lonely and always feeling like I was imposing on friends' families.
I would suggest having a scheduled social activity, a place of worship, a walking group, a choir, a reading club. Something that feels good to you and involved just being with other people.

Not having any family is really tough. Have you got a pet? They are.not to be underestimated.

Join a local committee or go and volunteer somewhere, you can meet lots of people through this. Might take a while to form solid friendships but you will definitely have lots of social interaction and it will take your mind off.

you need a hobby (or two!)

I'm sorry that you're feeling so low.

Seriously have a look into the Women's Institute - they have so many different interest groups e.g. art, wine-tasting, walks, history, etc. Women of all ages, particularly if you live in a city.

I'm not a member as have established friends, relatives and activities but I would definitely join if I were to move away. A friend is a member and she loves it - her London branch is particularly active.

The above friend I know from my dance class, and she introduced me to someone who runs an art class; another friend from the dance class got me interested in Tai Chi, and so on. As a pp has said, concentric circles.

You need to put yourself out there.

Is your counsellor nhs ask her about social prescribing or you can ask your gp

What are your hobbies? What volunteering do you do? What’s your exercise regime?

It sounds as if you’d benefit from some local activities you enjoy which will, by definition, be attended by other people who are enthusiastic about that activity, and, crucially, are free to commit to doing every week, or whatever.

Two things I’ve recently joined are a scratch women’s seasonal choir which rehearses weekly from mid-October and does one performance and one day of street singing just before Christmas for a local charity, and a local cinema club that meets in a city centre FE college and has a programme of arthouse films, and a glass of wine.

In my team we organise nights out or even team lunches. We are a fairly social bunch and catch-up every few months on a night out. If we’re in the office we go to the canteen together (even if we have bought our own lunch in). We celebrate each others birthdays (arrange collections in our small team of 9). There might be things you could do at work even a good chat at lunch or a coffee. My manager is great and we often have a really good chat about other things before we get down to work. Does your work have any social groups you could join?

I attend a weekly craft night and that’s been great to chat all things yarn related. I used to attend a virtual knit night and we're all over the country, but meet up every couple of months for lunch and a chat. There are so many companies/yarn shops that do knitting retreats where you can go on holiday with other crafters. There are sewing and yoga retreats and classes. The WI is another thing. I find most people are friendly and welcoming on these events. Everyone wants to have a good time and get on with each other.

I absolutely agree about hobbies. I think they are vital for social interaction for people who are short on family. A church if you are religious.

I think you're amazing to reach out with this, OP. I'm a SAHP and sometimes I realise I've not really spoken with another adult all day! We go to church and I volunteer on one of the teams there so that's a lot of socialisation, the weekly services plus being on team plus our team training and social events. I also go to the monthly church ladies' pub nights! Our local library runs a surprising number of regular events, conversational Spanish, book clubs, a knit and natter club. One of my friends is in a running club, they do loads together (and our independent running shop does lots of events too). I hope you find your tribe somewhere soon.

I have this and I don't work. Sorry, it's really shit at times. I have to really remind myself how I am lucky not to be in any dramas or booked up without any let up for expensive nights doing things I'd really rather not be. I think this time of year is always worst too as it's starting to get cold, dark early and there's less enthusiasm to try new things like clubs/leaving the house. It is what MN was made for though! Hope you are OK?

Fucksake. In my head these questions are barked, Sgt Major- like…
I feel for you OP. When my kids were tiny I actually couldn’t afford hobbies (or a sitter) so been lonely in the past.
It would be good if you could find something sociable to do on the long evenings. I’m starting a sewing class soon, which I can only do because I have a car as public transport near me is shite, but I’m looking forward to it.

This is so much more common than you think. So it isn’t you.

I’ve noticed that my single friends put themselves out there more - I’m doing this, do you want to come? To more people that they aren’t necessarily friends with but grow the relationship. Not many people have the balls to do that but it could be a way. I see a fair amount of people putting a post on the local Facebook group saying they’ve just moved to the area or they’ve decided to get out more and are looking for like minded people. Perhaps put your location here and see if you have any local mumsnetters.

the only way is clubs, activities or groups really.

I do go to church (which is why I see people on Sundays) and I'm also studying part time but actual classes are only once per month. I get involved with church events when they're on but obviously that's not actual constant connection with people because they only happen sporadically. And also if we're helping at an event we're usually more focused on the task at hand rather than on spending time with each other.
I'm really short on money at the moment so I can't afford to pay a membership fee or regular subscription for a club. I'm not sporty or creative anyway to be honest. I also don't particularly feel like I have the energy to join something new right now. I often just want to stay in and sleep.

The OP clearly doesn’t have kids at home though or she’d have had some interaction with them!!

My writing group subscription is £20 a year. Although if you are often tired and don't want to stay in then you're not likely to meet others except on Zoom. Our writing group has three meetings online each month.

Yeah obviously… I was just empathising - loneliness for different reasons.

Go left field. Friends of mine joined a drumming group they are always meeting up in pubs and perform at events and parties at the weekend. Something like that could turn your life round

You need to start going a class like cooking lessons

I've been there, and I know how isolated you must feel. My life felt very much like this not too long ago.

It turns out my friends had no idea how lonely I was, neither did my family as I was great at playing 'I'm fine and great at being independent'. If you have a close friend, maybe tell them? I know it might seem embarrassing, but maybe it might help?

I'm sorry it's all very bleak...I genuinely know how it feels 🩷

Why not try parkrun? There is probably one near you if you live in a town or city. You don't have to run. There are plenty of people who either walk around the course or volunteer at it. Where i volunteer, the volunteers all go for coffee together afterwards. It is very sociable. And free.
And between saturdays, when it is on, people post their photos of the event on facebook or other social media and chat about it. There are often special fun events in fancy dress and it's a great atmosphere. I have recently moved to a new area and have met lots of lovely people through being at parkrun. Might be something to consider.