How much do you drink? Honestly!

[Starlight1984]

And yes, yes I know there is an "alcohol support" section of MN but this isn't for help or advice or anything other than curiosity!

Just been reading on another thread about what people do and don't do which others would find unusual and a LOT of the posts include people saying they don't drink alcohol which I find insane as pretty much everyone I know drinks to some degree!

Anyway I'll start, I don't (or try not to!) drink from Mon - Thurs but on average will have a bottle of wine on Friday, Saturday and Sunday evenings. So 3 x bottles of wine a week. I know it's above the guidelines of "normal" drinking and know I need to cut down but it's something I genuinely enjoy. DH is the same. We never get drunk. We just slowly drink 3-4 glasses over the course of the evening (from about 6pm to 11ish) whilst making dinner, sitting down to eat, watching a film / reading a book... It's just something that helps us to unwind after a busy week!

So for AIBU

YABU - No thanks, would rather have a cup of tea.
YANBU - Pour me a large one!

Whether you think it insane or not, I don't drink alcohol. I have in the past, but would much rather have a cup of tea. I don't like the taste or how it makes me feel. I was teetotal from being 18 until I was about 32, would have the odd drink at a work party if I went out (rarely) then from around 33 I've never drank alcohol again. I'm 40 now.

Pretty normal 40 year old mum of two, I don’t drink a bottle of wine a year.

I will occasionally have one can or bottle of beer on a weekend but even that is not weekly.

Read my post again. I did not say it is "insane" that people don't drink.

I said it is insane that amongst my social circle (family, friends, colleagues, hobby group etc) pretty much everyone drinks but according to MN, barely anybody does!

And when have I said I'm comfortable with it?! I've literally said in my OP that I know I need to cut down!

Used to drink more but at 45 with small children it’s much less. I am quite sociable - e.g this week includes dinner with friends and a theatre trip. Two small glasses of wine with dinner and maybe one pre theatre. I might have a Friday night G&T. That’s it. 4-5 drinks a week max. If I don’t socialize I will likely have nothing and can easily go a couple of weeks without drinking. I only ever have small measures and I’d say it’s probably 8 units maximum but probably less and averaging out at 4-5 units a week. Every couple of months I might go out, out and have say 5 drinks in the one night but that usually puts me off drinking for a couple of weeks!

I personally feel like my drinking is so moderate that it isn’t a problem. I have considered stopping but I feel like that might make me think about wanting to drink more than just having the odd one does. I have no issues with stopping at one or not drinking.

Perimenopause has caused me to really feel the impact of drinking - if I indulge in more than 2 drinks in one sitting then I feel like crap, physically and mentally. It’s rarely worth it.

Nothing.

Yikes.

Nothing generally, xmas I'll usually have a baileys or an advocaat. I had a couple of nights out about 2 years ago and got drunk but nothing since.

I might have a drink every few months. Usually a glass of wine if I'm out for a meal but only if I have pasta. That's fine but any more and I'd feel horrible so no point. Usually liquers at Christmas.

Thank you ❤And exactly this.

I have literally said in my OP (which people clearly don't bother to read in full) that I know I drink more than I should! At no point have I said it's "normal" or "healthy".

The thread started off so well and I was really enjoying reading everyone's comments (yes, even the ones who don't drink at all!) but then it gets derailed and the judgment and criticism starts.

But just as people who are overweight know they need to lose weight, or smokers know they need to stop smoking, most people who drink know they drink too much and should probably cut down. But that wasn't really the point. I was just curious as to what the reality of drinking is these days. That's all.

Nothing now. I’m over 4 years sober.

Used to drink 70 - 100 units a week.

3 bottles of wine a week is double the safer drinking guidelines OP.

Less than a dozen units a year I'd guess. Glass of wine with dinner at Christmas and a few other special occasions, and a bottle of cider at New Year.

1.5 bottles of wine on a Friday or Saturday night

Well done that's a great achievement.

And yes, I know this. I have said it a few times. As I said, I didn't really start the thread for people to start judging each other but feels like it's gone that way which is a shame.

Very rarely, and even on big events like weddings or parties I drink very little. I would drink on holiday, maybe a glass of wine or an aperol, and occasionally a beer if we go to a pub, but that's like a twice a year thing if that!

Also, I should add that I used to drink at weekends if we were home, so at 6pm I'd have three bottles of beer or a couple of glasses of wine, but decided it was just too much so set a rule of 'only drinking socially' which worked well. And to be honest, even when I did go out I'd only have a small amount to drink so it massively cut me down

At one point I was a 1/2 bottle of wine a night drinker - dealing with lots of family stress so self medicating - but I became less able to function well the next morning. The family stress situation got a bit better so I was able to cut back, then suddenly found even one glass of wine left me feeling terrible the next day. I love the taste of wine too.

I do have the occasional craft beer when out with friends, instead of wine, but it must be 2-3 months since I last had any with alcohol in it due to usually driving to events.

I really don't miss the whole of the next day being written off due to a night out!

This is my pattern too

i can take it or leave it. But I like alcohol and enjoy a drink. What I find interesting is that when I have gone for longish periods without a drink, the longest was two months I did not notice any positive changes. I did not lose weight, my skin did not improve, my sleep was the same and I was as mentally competent as ever. So to me that indicates that when I do drink I do it within safe limits. I have had a terrible year, and when things were at their worst a glass of wine in the evening did take the sting out of the day. When I do drink I guess I get through a bottle of wine a week, and I drink one day on and one day off .

Here are some stats (in case not posted yet):

35 units or more is top 4% of female population for drinking (4 bottles of wine per week).

14 units or more of alcohol per week (1 bottle of wine is about 9 units, so this is around 1.5 bottles) then you are in the top 15% of the female population for drinking.

1 in 5 people (20% ) don't drink at all.

If you're a higher earner you are likely to drink more vs a lower earner.

In the North West or Scotland rates of drinking are higher than in the south east.

White people are less likely to be non-drinkers on average, all other ethnicities are significantly more likely to be non-drinkers.

https://digital.nhs.uk/data-and-information/publications/statistical/health-survey-for-england/2022-part-1/adult-drinking#:~:text=be%20accessed%20here.-,Key%20findings%20for%202022,24%25%20of%20other%20age%20groups.

I am mid 40s andnever ever drink on weekdays, even if it's a birthday, which we always celebrate as an extended family with food, and music so there will be a bottle of prosecco there.

I might have one drink on a Friday or Saturday night, once or twice in the month. Quite often I'll get to the end of the month and realise I haven't drunk anything.

I had a small rum and juice on Friday night, didn't finish it as it made me tired. Doubt I'll do it again this weekend. I get quite excited to go out for drinks with friends / partner, so then I'll have 2 or 3, but that only happens a few times a year... I consumed more alcohol before I had children, but the several 9 moths with none just made it far less central to a good time.

Younger people drink far far less. My cousin went out to a bar a few years back, lots of young people there, no one standing at the bar. She couldn't believe it! When we were younger the queue would layer around the bar 3 or 4 people deep! You'd miss your favourite song standing in that bloody drinks line!

I rarely drink these days. Maybe a few on holiday or christmas. In my late teens and early 20s I was out every weekend and maybe once in the week getting drunk sometimes to the point of not remembering sections of the evening. We did have great fun most of the time but the memory loss part does now scare me thinking back. In my 30s my children arrived and I went out a lot less only ever rarely drinking enough to get drunk. During covid we then drank at home (probably too much) but now I don't buy any alcohol for at home. I would honestly prefer a cup of tea. I don't want to get drunk anymore and don't like the after effects the next day. I dont go out so often but will drive instead of drinking if I do.

A healthy lifestyle is considered desirable where I am and it's recognized that alcohol use doesn't contribute to that. People unwind by doing physical or mental activity or things like meditation.

You started the judgement by saying you found it insane that there are people who drink no alcohol simply because your social group does.

Tbh I think many people in the UK have quite unhealthy relationships with alcohol.

I think if you find it difficult to miss a week or you find yourself thinking of the evening's drinking in the daytime or would prefer to drink at home than do some else then it's usually a slippery slope.

From having two alcoholic parents (who denied this as they "only drank wine") and a turbulent relationship with alcohol myself in my 20s, I now only drink a few times a year (eg Christmas, birthday, weddings.

I've completely reset my relationship with alcohol and just don't even think about it on a week-to-week basis. It is very liberating and it would feel very weird to drink on a random weekend.

I would say my social group is split into those who probably drink like I do and those who drink as though they're still in their 20s. I have two friends in particular who are definitely in-denial alcoholics.

Oh for gods sake.

I was reading a thread in which many, many commentors said they don't drink and I thought how weird it was how on MN, that's usually the case but it's the complete opposite in my "real life" where pretty much everyone I know drinks. That is all!

If you managed to get any judgment from my OP then that says more about you than about me.

Oh, another reason is I do think about cancer rates with alcohol. That makes me think twice when I feel the urge. Then I just have a cup of tea.

But I do really like alcohol. Love it, even when socialising ;)