Primary school child - toilet humour?!

[Ghat55]

My son is in Y3 in a small class of 16, there's a boy who is always annoying the kids. Ie scoring in his own goal, hiding other childrens bags, taking lunches, telling kids they are stupid, pulling girls hair in class, dancing in class etc etc.

He's always been this way since nursery.

This year though there have been some odd incidents. During break he went into the boys toilets and from the outside unlocked the cubicle door ( with a coin / old fashioned locks ) while a boy from his class was in the cubicle and laughed that he had seen the boy on the loo.

A week later one of the new boys was at the urinal and he leaned over the barrier and told the boy he had "a nice w*lly". He turned to a different boy at the urinal and again leaning over said "you dont" . He watches the boys when they are changing for PE and my son has said he feels uncomfortable so turns away. One of the mothers has told me her son wears PE shorts under his trousers to not have to change infront of others. I suspect this boy is the reason.

My son witnessed both the toilet events so I'm not sure if there are more incidents happening in the toilets / changing room with this boy.

I spoke to the school about one of the incidents and they said they were aware and had asked the said boy to reflect on the innapropriatness of it, and informed his parents. (His mother btw couldn't care less about any of his behaviours).

My other half thinks it's nothing, the boy is just being annoying as usual. But i feel there is more to it and i think it can easily lead to an innapropriate event / touching in the toilets. AIBU?

How would you go about making sure your childs is protected ( and the other boys ) when they are in the toilet or changing for PE and this boy is around? I can't help but think something is seriously wrong.

I think you’re right, this will escalate.
Have you spoken to the head? If you’re not happy with their response I’d escalate to the school safeguarding lead and governors.

You need to inform the school every time your son is impacted by this behaviour in an objective factual way that describes exactly what happened and the affect it has on your son. Do this via email, ending each communication with "I'd appreciate your assurance this will not happen to DS again, and the steps you will be taking to prevent it".
Avoid any subjective comments or focusing on what they intend to do about the other boy (they will tell you they can't discuss him) or behaviour that hasnt directly impacted your son (they are likely to refuse to discuss things that happened to boys who are not your son )and keep it about your sons rights to privacy and not to be harassed, and how they will protect those rights.
Example:
"DS has witnessed child X making inappropriate remarks about other boys genitals when they are using the urinals and breaking into a toilet another child was using. He is now uncomfortable about using the toilets and changing in front of child X in the event he will also be targetted. I would appreciate your assurance that DSs privacy will be protected and the steps you intend to take to prevent him being harassed"

They asked the boy to reflect on the inappropriateness of it?! They need to come down on him like a ton of bricks! Escalate this to the head and governors if you need to. This is appalling.

and teach your son how to throw a good right hook

You are quite right, the school will not discuss another child with you, or the actions they are taking, but I would hazard a guess that behind the scenes they are becoming increasingly concerned.
If it turns out that something is seriously amiss, your reports of each concerning event may well prove positive, Each one in isolation is apparently trivial, but the cumulative effect is one of the little pieces of the jigsaw coming together, and the school will be able to a dossier of specific events, rather than referring to worrying tendencies.

You absolutely need to document each incident of this happening. Besides being annoying and upsetting for the other boys, there’s a safeguarding issue concerning the perpetrator here too - it’s not really normal behaviour for a 7 year old to be so interested in other children’s genitalia. School need to monitor this carefully.