Only one parent taking kids on holidays at Easter

[ppllknl]

Dh and I have been together for a long time, have one DC and realistically are no longer on the best of terms. At home especially on the weekends, we usually just do our own thing with our DC, with the other parent often working, doing chores. It's not ideal but it is what it is. However, things often dont run very smoothly when we go on family holidays, Dh and I often just dont see eye to eye and it spoils things. Would it be totally outrageous to suggest that Dh takes Dc on holidays by himself over Easter? I am already taking Dc away by myself over Xmas and we went away for a week just the two of us in the summer - both times because Dh doesnt have much AL left.

I'm not sure why it would be outrageous, just put it to him and see what he says

When I was a child my brother and I often got taken away by one parent (in our case because both parents worked full time and had no family help so needed to save their annual leave). It's fine OP - and better than a family holiday ruined by tensions.

I take my kids on holiday on my own all the time, and DH takes them too.

We haven't got so much time off to take, it's more expensive when there's another adult. It's just a different kind of holidays.

I don't see what the big deal is.

However
realistically are no longer on the best of terms
sounds like a toxic relationship to raise a child into. If you can barely tolerate each other and everybody is miserable, might be time to think about separating and offering your child a happy home.

It sounds like it would be fine to propose it. I think what’s difficult is that it feels like an admission that one of the last things we still do as a family isn’t working well anymore. Day to day, we’re fine largely because we don’t spend much time together or have to negotiate shared plans. Holidays make that much harder. We can’t even start talking about them without arguing.

For example, we usually go long haul at Easter, which requires planning and early booking. However, DH prefers doing everything last minute and hasn’t adjusted to planning ahead with a child. He still wants to be involved, but realistically he only engages about six weeks before travelling — and we simply can’t book something expensive, like Thailand, at the last minute. This year, I’m choosing to disengage. He and DC could probably do a last-minute trip more affordably without me.

When we are away, we also clash: I’m an early riser who wants to make the most of the day, especially with a six-year-old who needs meals and routine. He won’t leave the Airbnb until midday, by which point I feel half the day is wasted. I don’t want these arguments in front of our child anymore. If I’m not there, they can find their own rhythm, just as DC and I do when it’s just the two of us.