A CM one, AIBU to ask for more?

[CanterburyRoadBlock]

My son is 15. His Father and I separated after a domestic incident when DS was about 2.

Ex has since remarried. He drives a brand new Mercedes, and they go on holiday at least 3 times a year. He and his wife have no children. He works FT as a lorry driver.

Since my son was around 7, I have been given £40 a week. My son has size 12 feet and is in adult men's medium clothing. He eats a lot of meat and does sports which mean a lot of travel.

I work FT in a middle role after putting myself through a masters. I am having to use a credit card by the end of the month.

The last time I contacted CMS about 7 years ago he threatened me, so I just accepted the £40 because its better than nothing (at the point I would regularly go without meals). He sees DS EOW, and 2 weeks during the 7 week summer holiday, 5 days at Christmas. DS is not 100% comfortable around him i dont think, i dont think he'll be happy if I ask for anything more.

But can I?

Thanks @Ireeei actually think now he will stop payments and fall on the loophole of a ZH contract, which I didnt realise he was on. I pretty sure if youve bee employed consistently for a period of over 2 years you are classed as an employee, but I cant prove this.

I think i may have shot myself in the foot asking him to look at the calculator, and now he's also refusing to contribute to the school trip.

I didnt think I'd get such shit behaviour as a response.

You should have just gone straight to CMS and let them deal with it. Any threats off him go to the police.

It doesn’t matter that he is on a zero hours contract. What matters is his pay. All of his pay will be reported to HMRC. Child maintenance service use the amounts provided by HMRC.

Stop talking to him. Dont say a word to him about it anymore.

CMS are open now. Call them up right now and open a case. That’s all you need to do. They will do the rest. They contact him, get his salary from HMRC and calculate an amount. You should have done it years ago. I really don’t understand why you didn’t. If he threatened you then you should have called the police.

Why do so many women just bend over and take it?

There is no zero hours contact loophole. If he is working and is paid then the pay is what matters. CMS calculate based on the actual amount he is paid, not the hours in his contact.

CMS is shit and a shambles.

If they are a straight employee and employed, brilliant. If they are on zero hours, self-employed or benefits, forget it. You’ll be lucky to get £7 like my DH is supposed to receive!

Zero hours contract has nothing to do with it.

Self employed is different, they can fiddle and lie. But even someone on a zero hours contract is still paid by PAYE and their income all goes through HMRC. CMS use the figure from HMRC. They do not look at your employment contract.

If he gets paid then they can trace it and calculate the right amount, and get the money out of him.

If he starts quitting jobs and moving around jobs then that’s different. But a zero hours contract doesn’t matter.

What will happen is he will just go self-employed, that’s why you need to be careful. He’s not tied into any organisation like say a teacher or a doctor is, standard employee through PAYE.

He will go to his zero hours contract employer and ask if he can work self-employed instead, or just simply ask his employer to refuse any DEO from CMS.

Just go straight to CMS, they will look at HMRC and see what he earned last year and then give you a figure he needs to pay.

He also DJs and makes music on the side, he didnt start doing this until maybe 5 years ago, but there will be pay from this, and I wont get that.

Thanks again everyone. I did call CMS this morning before I messaged him, listened to the all messaging and selected the right number, then it kept repeating the same phone message and I was feeling brave enough to do something about it today, so instead of waiting I sent him the message. I should have waited. I told myself I cant be scared anymore and I neee to advocate for DS. I didn't actually expect such a shitty response. I should have known better.

I can't believe the flat rate of £7, or the nil payments, its immoral. I wish the CMS would be overhauled. These other parents, who have equal responsibility for their child should face penalties. I wonder how many children would be lifted out of poverty, or have more opportunities and become a well rounded adult if the other parent took their share of responsibility. I'm so sorry to hear these stories.

According to the National Careers Service, an experienced lorry driver can expect to earn £47k per year. My friend’s ex is a recently qualified HGV driver and she gets £320 pcm. Personally I’d go through the CMS and let them deal with him.

I absolutely would not be trying to communicate with him about it. He’s a disgusting excuse of a human being.

Hi @CanterburyRoadBlock
You say ex re-married. If there are children he supports in that marriage, chwck how things stand because I know the law prioritises the second family (child/children) over the first. It isn't right/ethical but I think that is how the system currently works?

Also if DS isnt bothered, let father know. Timing may be key...

Good luck

Thanks @LemonLass, there are no other children, none from his wife or anywhere else.

Hopefully CM will look into it and force a bigger payment. However, realistically I would prefer yourself to be budgeting without the £40 he has been sending.

The whole system is an absolute shambles! I expect his wife is funding him but that will probably change once your DS is old enough to not long be considered a qualifying child and the risk of having to pay for him goes.

He is a lorry driver. With the recent new laws around self employment, he will not be able to go self employed. And his company cannot ignore a DOE.

Look, I agree that CMS is useless when it comes to recovering debt or getting a true figure from self employed parents who fiddle it. But when you’re in employment, doesn’t matter what the contracted hours are, they get the figures from HMRC and they get the payments most of the time. This isn’t a complicated case of self employment or job hopping to avoid a DOE. He is employed, a contracted employee and gets paid via PAYE which goes through HMRC.

@CanterburyRoadBlock
Call CMS again and open a case. It isn’t difficult.