I’m not sure what happened to my Uncle - all I know is my late Grandma would be mortified. These are the most recent examples: When husband and I got married this year, he kicked up a fuss about the wedding date, he said we should’ve ‘consulted’ him and his family first to see if they were free (we did, we picked the dates they weren’t on holiday but the date we did pick he happened to be on a work trip) - but he emotionally burdened me into feeling guilty but my husbands family didn’t act like this at all. I was also in my first trimester of pregnancy, and not ONCE did he reach out to see how I was, it was just about him and his grudges about the wedding date and constant harassment about why we picked a certain church. And when I didn’t answer (because I don’t need to justify myself to him) he said ‘you haven’t answered me’ …. Umm F off? Anyway, it was all talk because he ended up cancelling his work trip.
He swore at my wedding, called my husbands father a ‘motherfucker’ because he didn’t look at his camera when he was taking a pic (yes he meant it as a joke but it was embarrassing and he wasn’t drunk ). He bought his own beer from an off licensing to the evening party of our which was not permitted as there was a corkage fee. That alone I might be able to forgive but he left the cans on the floor at the entrance of the venue. Tasteless. We paid for ample champagne at our reception and wine with our meal. He then turned up to our wedding breakfast the next day in a tracksuit and was being loud and roudy.
This isn’t just exhaustive to the wedding - he is so loud, rowdy, attention seeking and all about him. This is just the most recent cherry on the cake so to speak.
As for my Aunty - she’s nuts and I’ve always been making excuses for her. My mum especially can’t stand her because she thinks shes no good for her brother and I see it now. She’s a housewife (on paper is wonderful) but she’s about as useful as a board. She sits on her PC gambling all day. She has a gambling addiction apparently. she doesn’t cook, doesn’t clean, she doesn’t go to the shops. I’m not saying women should dedicate their lives to that if they’re not working but when I was there at half term because my parents were working she would just buy us McDonald’s and KFC. Her children are adults now but I’ve never known her to cook her family a meal. I remember when it was my mum hosting Christmas, my aunty and uncle would just go straight outside to smoke and when I turned 18 and built enough courage I actually told them to go inside and help my mother.
She’s one of those people that prefer animals over humans - but here’s the funny thing. She leaves her cat in her bedroom loft conversion because she doesn’t want it to escape. Isn’t that the opposite of someone who claims to love animals?!?
They both smoke INDOORS. In their kitchen. They never stopped. This always annoyed me even as a child. My youngest cousin had numerous asthma attacks and had to be taken to the hospital as a baby and toddler and it’s obviously because of this. I’m so surprised social services didn’t get involved. Now he’s 18 and is a smoker (I know that’s his own choice)
I just look at them and think what an embarrassment. I don’t think it bothered me before but in the limelight of my own recent life developments, I really just want nothing to do with them.
My Mum asked me if I’m telling my uncle the sex of our baby and I told her I just have no interest in initiating conversation. She said ‘he’s still your uncle’ but I told her that I told my cousin and of course he can tell his dad if he wishes.
we now live 40 mins away from them so it will be easy to distance I hope, they might notice my absence from group chat replies but otherwise I will just explode and tell them what I think which I’m sure will do more damage than good, so hopefully I can just be respectful and polite at family events, unlike my uncle who calls people ‘motherfuckers’….