To sit at someone else's table at soft play?

Crapola25 · 2025-10-20T09:19:01+00:00

I've come to a big soft play this morning, it's first day of half term (abroad) and out of 70 tables they are all taken. By taken i mean coats and bags draped over the chair. I can see one table of 4 with a coat on the chair and notebook on the table and 2 pairs of shoes so presumably 1 adult and 1 child. Would I be unreasonable to sit there (I'm 1 adult with 1 child) until asked to move? Lots of tables are "empty" as in noone sat there just belongings on them. Otherwise nowhere else to sit and I want to do some work.

Cyclistmumgrandma · 20/10/2025 10:24

Not unreasonable. I might be inclined to first approach an occupied table with an adult there and ask if I could join them as that would leave no opportunity for misunderstanding and argument later.

SriouslyWhutNow · 20/10/2025 10:24

Sorry YABU, you should be supervising your child at soft play not doing work. All the people I see working at soft plays have feral out of control children and the parents are so focused on working that they don’t notice or do anything about their kids’ behaviour. When called on it, they seem shocked that you mean their child, because they obviously ignore them regularly and don’t know what they are like. I think you should get proper childcare and use soft play as it is intended - as a place where you engage with your child, not as a creche.

JazzHandsYeah · 20/10/2025 10:26

I read the work thing and changed my mind. YABU to dump your child in soft play then sit at a laptop ignoring them. You should be supervising, presumably like the other parents.

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 20/10/2025 10:27

SriouslyWhutNow · 20/10/2025 10:24

Sorry YABU, you should be supervising your child at soft play not doing work. All the people I see working at soft plays have feral out of control children and the parents are so focused on working that they don’t notice or do anything about their kids’ behaviour. When called on it, they seem shocked that you mean their child, because they obviously ignore them regularly and don’t know what they are like. I think you should get proper childcare and use soft play as it is intended - as a place where you engage with your child, not as a creche.

Sod this. Once your kids are old enough and sensible enough soft they don't need constant supervision. Not every child goes Lord of the Flies at soft play.

OP - just take an empty looking table and move if asked.

MumChp · 20/10/2025 10:28

If a chair is free it's up to use. Just say can I sit here? It's a softplay.

Foreverwipingcounters · 20/10/2025 10:28

I'd find it strange to take an occupied table, yes. Approach a table that someone is sat at and ask if it is ok to sit there.

Poppingby · 20/10/2025 10:28

Unless they are very small, kids need to take risks and play on their own. Soft play is the perfect safe place for this especially if the op can sit nearby in case needed. Working, reading, looking at her phone, whatever. It's dull but it is necessary for kids to have these experiences.

OP I would ask someone at a table if you can sit as a pp said.

MumChp · 20/10/2025 10:29

SriouslyWhutNow · 20/10/2025 10:24

Sorry YABU, you should be supervising your child at soft play not doing work. All the people I see working at soft plays have feral out of control children and the parents are so focused on working that they don’t notice or do anything about their kids’ behaviour. When called on it, they seem shocked that you mean their child, because they obviously ignore them regularly and don’t know what they are like. I think you should get proper childcare and use soft play as it is intended - as a place where you engage with your child, not as a creche.

I had 2 on 13 yo in softplay last week. I had a coffee. They know how to find me.

TheatricalLife · 20/10/2025 10:29

Sounds like absolute hell on earth. 70 tables full?! I think I'd struggle to work in there anyway, surely it's chaos and so noisy.
Anyway, I'd probably hover around and look for an occupied table and ask if I could take a chair if they were not using it and plonk myself in a corner somewhere.

ThePants999 · 20/10/2025 10:30

SriouslyWhutNow · 20/10/2025 10:24

Sorry YABU, you should be supervising your child at soft play not doing work. All the people I see working at soft plays have feral out of control children and the parents are so focused on working that they don’t notice or do anything about their kids’ behaviour. When called on it, they seem shocked that you mean their child, because they obviously ignore them regularly and don’t know what they are like. I think you should get proper childcare and use soft play as it is intended - as a place where you engage with your child, not as a creche.

If your kid's a toddler and using the dedicated young kids' area, sure. Otherwise - nonsense. They all have signs saying that to legally cover their arses, but what are you gonna do, make your kid constantly wait while you awkwardly clamber through the child-sized frame trying to follow them? I don't know how the ones near you are designed, but in the ones I used, the kids are out of sight twenty seconds after their shoes are off. Supervision is a lost cause, and the reason all these tables and chairs are there is because most people (including the owners) get that.

Bearbookagainandagain · 20/10/2025 10:32

I wouldn't mind, we regularly share tables at soft play, and we only really need all the chairs if the kid are having a snack.

But personally I don't settle at an occupied table if the person isn't there. I use the chair if i need it, sit nearby and when I see them ask if I can share the table/chairs. You never really know how many children there are otherwise.

I think I would be slightly annoyed if the person was using the table to work as well. Kids are messy, tables are small, we use them for drinks, snacks, ... I don't want to have to pay attention to someone else's laptop/work documents!

Original poster

Crapola25 · 20/10/2025 10:33

Yeh he's old enough to go off on his own and its a huge soft play- no adults allowed in the bits you climb through/soft play structure - he knows where i am, i'm not a helicopter parent.
I did have alternative childcare planned for half term but fell through at the last minute due to illness.
I've just taken an empty chair to one side, and hopefully people will leave at lunchtime, free up some space.

OP posts:

Poppingby · 20/10/2025 10:52

TheatricalLife · 20/10/2025 10:29

Sounds like absolute hell on earth. 70 tables full?! I think I'd struggle to work in there anyway, surely it's chaos and so noisy.
Anyway, I'd probably hover around and look for an occupied table and ask if I could take a chair if they were not using it and plonk myself in a corner somewhere.

It does sound like hell on earth tbh. Maybe a meditation app instead of work?!

Original poster

Crapola25 · 20/10/2025 10:56

Can confirm it is hell on earth. But at least one of us is having fun

OP posts:

CatchTheWind1920 · 20/10/2025 11:07

It's very normal to share tables in situations like this in Germany so I'd just do it as I've been accustomed to it.

Natsku · 20/10/2025 11:12

I would just sit down at the least occupied table.
Could do worse though, someone moved my coat from a chair at an indoor play place last week and sat there instead - I had only gone to check on my child a moment.

BoringBarbie · 20/10/2025 11:16

SriouslyWhutNow · 20/10/2025 10:24

Sorry YABU, you should be supervising your child at soft play not doing work. All the people I see working at soft plays have feral out of control children and the parents are so focused on working that they don’t notice or do anything about their kids’ behaviour. When called on it, they seem shocked that you mean their child, because they obviously ignore them regularly and don’t know what they are like. I think you should get proper childcare and use soft play as it is intended - as a place where you engage with your child, not as a creche.

You sound like a dreadful helicopter.

Original poster

Crapola25 · 20/10/2025 11:28

@SriouslyWhutNow I was a SAHM for the first 4.5 years of DS life so I followed him around all the soft plays and can confirm he's not a feral child. If he was, I would be watching him like a hawk or not going to soft plays at all.

OP posts:

NotEnoughKnittingTime · 20/10/2025 11:30

Erm no I wouldn't want you taking my table. Find your own.

NotEnoughKnittingTime · 20/10/2025 11:31

Crapola25 · 20/10/2025 11:28

@SriouslyWhutNow I was a SAHM for the first 4.5 years of DS life so I followed him around all the soft plays and can confirm he's not a feral child. If he was, I would be watching him like a hawk or not going to soft plays at all.

I wouldn't be so sure. Some kids are sneaky.

TheSwarm · 20/10/2025 11:31

JazzHandsYeah · 20/10/2025 10:26

I read the work thing and changed my mind. YABU to dump your child in soft play then sit at a laptop ignoring them. You should be supervising, presumably like the other parents.

Yeah... no. Once kids are in that phase of being old enough to run through a soft play structure by themselves, it's totally fine for a parent to find a table and have a coffee or whatever, and occasionally try to spot them in mess of tunnels and slides and stuff.

And OP, if it's busy and a table is being unused other than as a place for the dumping of a coat and shoes, crack on.

Obviouslynamechanged12 · 20/10/2025 13:23

It is probably fine. I am not in the UK, but another country in Europe, and at soft play it is common that the large tables are shared. I would expect it. You probably won’t even be at the table at the same time and it makes leaving things there a bit more secure. You can always move if they are arsey.

TeenLifeMum · 20/10/2025 13:43

Tables at soft play are just a “base” for coats and shoes. I’d plonk myself down until a free table appeared.

I love when mums of younger ones comment. I think, until your child isn’t 3 any more it’s really hard to imagine sitting in soft play or the park with a book.

BlueandPinkSwan · 20/10/2025 14:07

Supervise / watch your kid or be like a lot of people gawp mindlessly at your phone. It's not a bloody work station.

Original poster

Crapola25 · 20/10/2025 14:14

@BlueandPinkSwan well can confirm we managed 2 hours and there was 0 supervision, and everyone was fine. Not possible to supervise a kid that's inside a massive soft play full of tunnels etc. Maybe best to raise your kid so that you can trust them to play on soft play nicely without constant supervision.

OP posts: