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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect my 5 week old to NOT cry most of the day???????

37 replies

Kaybeeand2boys · 05/06/2008 10:45

DS2 is 5 weeks and seems to spend most of his waking hours crying, maybe has a few 5 - 10 min periods of not crying, plus obviously is quiet when feeding! DS1 was like this too, but worse. Is this really normal??? Other people I know don't seem to have this problem......I just can't help thinking 'Why me? Why can't I have one of those happy smiley babies.......'

OP posts:
cheeset · 05/06/2008 10:57

Colic, wind, teeth, have you ben through the list methodically?

MamaG · 05/06/2008 10:59

Poor you Kaybee it must be very diffcult for you to cope with at the moment. Agree with cheeset that its a good idea to think about why he might be crying

sagitta · 05/06/2008 10:59

DD2 is 3.5 weeks, and i've just started having the same problem. I have to hold her all the time...yanbu. i want one of those happy cooing babies too...

sneekpeeks · 05/06/2008 11:01

Oh you poor love

This isn't going to sound very helpful, but my DS cried for the first 3 mths !!
The only god send was that he slept really well at night, so I went with the thought that I could handle the days as long as the nights were ok.

Keep smiling, it won't last forever

Why is it that everyone esle looks like its all a breeze and you feel like you are going to explode.................??!!??

BroccoliSpears · 05/06/2008 11:01

Hungry? That's my answer to everything as my babies are always hungry. DS is 5 weeks and he's either asleep or feeding really.

Have you tried slinging him? (err... putting him in a sling, rather than slinging him out of the window I mean.)

MrsBadger · 05/06/2008 11:02

...and if it's nothing obvious and he just wants to be held (which is reasonable for a 5wo), have you got a decent sling?

cheeset · 05/06/2008 11:03

My DH and I would go thro the list methodically. I'd tune out of the cry and tell myself that the cry was a sentence IYSWIM. This made me feel less stressed and that the baby was saying 'come on, hurry up luv!' It helped me not to lose my composure, sounds barking though!

WigWamBam · 05/06/2008 11:04

Most people don't have happy, smiley babies, you know; at least not at five weeks.

Five weeks ago he was still inside you, getting everything he needed without even thinking about it. Now he experiences hunger, thirst, lots of new sensations which he still hasn't made sense of - it's no wonder new babies cry a lot.

I know it's hard at the moment; those first few weeks are hell on legs, but he will settle and things will get better.

NotABanana · 05/06/2008 11:06

Oh dear. Are you okay? Do you have anyone to come and keep you company so you can have a break?

When mine were small it hwlped to have a check list for when they cried

hungry
tired
nappy change needed
cold
too hot
needing space

solo · 05/06/2008 11:09

Mine screamed for the first 6.6 months 24/7, but they do improve as you no doubt know from your first Dc. Empathies coming your way.xxx

yomellamoHelly · 05/06/2008 11:12

My heart goes out to you.
Ds1 was like this. Then it all suddenly stopped at 8.5 months and I nearly fell over in delighted shock.
When did things calm down with your ds1?
My advice would be to try and find an hour here or there to restore your calm. (I used to go the gym and put him in the creche and they would walk the floor with him.) At weekends I'd leave dh with him for as long as I cold get away with.
One of my friends remembers how tough my first was (her third was the same for the first 3 months). It helps looking back to know that it wasn't just me who remembers him being that way.

MrsBadger · 05/06/2008 11:13

(and, just for balance, I had the opposite experience to sneekpeeks - DD was a shocking sleeper and the only thing that got me through the hellish nights was that she was pretty chilled during the day...)

Lizzer · 05/06/2008 11:15

I agree, sling him up so he feels like he's back inside, feed constantly and tell yourself the reason why he's so upset is because he's a really intelligent little man and he's really annoyed at not being able to sit and play with his toys yet,and that you really ought to start looking around Oxford and Cambridge cos he'll be spending a good few years at one of them in the future

Sorry its so hard, i remember it well

DKMA · 05/06/2008 11:17

I found a sling very useful when DS was like this in the early days.
Poor you ........... it's not nice is it?

cheeset · 05/06/2008 11:22

It's so lonely when you have a really young screaming child isn't it?

Bringing back all those memories

Good luck, keep posting as will help

moopdaloop · 05/06/2008 11:24

cranial osteopathy?
wind?
nappy?
cuddling?

MrsTittleMouse · 05/06/2008 11:33

My DD was one of those crying babies too. It really shocked my parents, who had never seen such a "shouty" baby. We just thought that it was normal. Except that of course, it was normal for her.
I'm of the "there's not much that you can do as this is mostly down to the personality of the baby and just be thankful that it will pass" school of thought.

flamingtoaster · 05/06/2008 11:37

My DS cried if put down during the day for his first six weeks. I carried him about all day and handed him to DH when he came home so I could cook. At six weeks (when he could sit in the bouncy chair and watch me) he suddenly decided he could be put down without crying - I still remember the first time I went to the loo and he wasn't crying! He then turned into the happiest baby I could have wished for. Hopefully your DS2 will have happier days soon.

Original poster
Kaybeeand2boys · 05/06/2008 12:14

thanks for all your posts.

have tried all the usual hungry/nappy/windy/hot/cold.......

he is very windy - mostly the bottom end - and when he cries seems like he is in pain. if cuddling him/carrying him around helped i would gladly do it all day!

it's just so hard as ds1 is only 18mths and wants lots of attention.

My friend recently had her dc2 and he is virtually no trouble, and i can't help feeling

OP posts:
sagitta · 05/06/2008 12:18

DD2 has reflux which makes her miserable. Any signs of that? The hv has recommended that I feed her less, which has helped a bit..
I reckon everyone has some trouble with their dcs - even if its not now, it'll be later. The HV told me that my troublesome two-yr old would probably be a great teenager to make up for the hell she gives me now...its not much consolation, but its something!

SingingBear · 05/06/2008 12:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

solo · 05/06/2008 13:10

When Ds had colic and was very windy and in obvious pain, I made up a jug of camomile tea(1 tea bag to 1 pint boiling water, steep for a long time whilst cooling on the top, remove bag) which I kept in the fridge and added cooled, but warm boiled water to in a bottle and added a tiny amount of brown sugar to before offering to uncomfortable baby...worked a treat at getting rid of the painful wind and seemed to calm him down a lot.

howdoo · 06/06/2008 02:11

It may have been said before (haven't read whole thread), but try Colief - it is the only thing I found that works for colic, and it works in a few days - get it from the chemist. It sounds to me like it is colic. It's not fair on you or him to have an always screaming baby. Let me know how you get on.

TheMadHouse · 06/06/2008 02:23

I read your post and it hit such a cord - you could have been me.

DS1 was a colicy baby, he cried and cried and cried. I was so shocked, I revented in to my self and spent the time he was crying, crying too.

Colief did help, as did cranial oesteopothy - a real godsend. It stopped at 16 weeks and although that might seem like a lifetime away at the moment, you need to remember there is life at the end of the tunnel.

Noboidy I met through antinatel had a baby like mine, they used to look at me with pity in their eyes and offer to hold him, only to give him straight back when the crying didnt stop.

DS2 was the same. I guess I wasnt meant to have contented small babies, but I tell you what - I have mighty fine, happy boys, who bring out the best in everyone around them and bring such joy to our lives.

CantSleepWontSleep · 06/06/2008 07:19

Dd screamed all day and all night for 4 months, then I gave up dairy in my diet (breastfeeding) and she got much better. It is thought by many that colic is quite often just undiagnosed milk intolerance.

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