Posting here for traffic.
My best friend and I have been friends for 8 years and became friends as soon as we met. I’ve always had close female friends, she is very shy and hasn’t had close friends since school. Her husband and my husband get on ok and we have had evenings out as a foursome. But he has always been a bit odd if I spend too much time just with her. She has mentioned that she feels she has to do something with him each week if we have been out that week. He will find reasons for us not to do things alone and seems to try to discourage her from spending too much time with her. He has made comments such as ‘No one understands her like I do’
Recently she lost a parent and we have been talking every day. She’s the eldest so has had to do most of the organising. She has really been struggling and I’ve made it clear she can call me anytime. This week we had lunch, which lasted nearly 3 hours. She did most of the talking which is unusual. She mentioned that she would not tell her husband how long we had been out for an also expressed concern that she would not stay close to her younger sister now both parents had died, as their husbands don’t get on. She also said that her husband doesn’t know how often we talk or text.
I mentioned this to my husband and he feels that my friend’s husband wants to keep her all to himself. He believes that the husband has always been jealous of our friendship and that this is why she has not had close female friends previously.
Do people agree? I have ADHD so don’t always read situations well. I want to help my friend but I don’t want to cause problems for her. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.