Wibu to spend the money on this?

[squashedalmondcroissant]

DS2 is severely disabled and has respite care once a week for approx 4hrs. This is paid for and we get an allowance specially for this.

He is turning 18 next year and I really want to do something special for him for it, he loves Disney and is still mentally at around 5/6yrs so I’d love to take him to Disneyland Paris and I know he would really enjoy it.

Unfortunately sometimes the respite carers are not available on a given week or they have to skip a few weeks due to lack of staff but we continue to receive the payments so we have build up a few grand in excess payments due to no fault of our own. We can’t stop the payments temporarily when we don’t have them for a week/weeks and sometimes they cancel at short notice.

DS is very physically large and strong and although he is mobile he has a wheelchair which is very heavy to push and manage. He has been assessed as needing a 2:1 ratio of carers as he is too much for one person alone. My sister has agreed to come with us on his birthday trip to help out but unfortunately lost her job some months ago and hasn’t managed to find another one yet. I’m paying for myself and DS for the trip but I can’t afford to cover her as well and sadly I don’t think I can manage him on my own so if she can’t come then we can’t go.

Wibu be unreasonable to use the excess respite payments to pay for her to accompany us for his birthday trip? We aren’t supposed to use the payments for anything other than respite but this is a special one off trip and it seems silly to have the money sitting there unable to be used. Wibu?

You are taking your sister as an additional carer, it doesn’t matter that she is a relative. The holiday and the help sound very much like respite for you all.

Hope you have an amazing trip.

No , you can't do that. You can ask social services but they will say no.

They aren't going to pay travel and expenses for your sister and direct payments don't like paying for family members.

Are you sure they’re not going to ask for the excess back? If so I’d use them for this without a second thought. Have a good trip.

You need to speak to the social worker and get this agreed.

Otherwise you’ll come unstuck when you get the audit. Also paying a family member is not the same as paying carers etc.

Do it properly and fingers crossed they say yes.

I’m happy to pay for her expenses if they will pay for mine or DS’, would they agree to that? I’m happy to pay for 2 I just can’t pay for all 3 of us.

No, you can only use it for the agreed carers. No expenses.

Don’t they audit? If they’ve paid money for respite/sits and you’ve got had them then surely they can ask for it back?

The money is for respite not for you, your sister and son to go to Disneyland

If you’ve managed to build up a couple of grand that must be a few missed respite/sits. If so I’ll services realise you e not been having them - have you reported why and the problem because they could decide that you now don’t need them all

Yes it has been reported about the reasons for sessions being missed but there are limited places that can take him on the required days so it’s unavoidable. The few grand has built up over a number of years.

I have 10k in my direct payment account. Also built up over years when my son didn't have care. But I can use it for the care I am allowed, so if I took someone else on, I could give them loads of hours until I am down to where I would be with the rolling hours. My son gets 10 hours a week plus his day centre.

They are very firm that it can't be used for anything else. They tell you it all when they set it up. Also, the yearly audits check for irregularities.

I asked once about putting a family member on the payroll and they said no.

I don’t know about the legalities of it all, but it makes sense to me that you should be able to pay your sister to accompany you as she will be providing care.

Either way, I hope you manage to go and I hope your lovely son has an amazing time xxx

You can’t pay a family member as far as I’m aware - it needs to be someone qualified to provide that care

I do get why it may not be allowed but it does seem strange that a random carer who has never met him before could receive payment for taking him somewhere and yet a close family member who is as qualified to look after him as I am, can’t. She knows all his routines and needs, can communicate with him and he knows and trusts her. I do see why it could be open to abuse so I understand, but it is a bit frustrating.

if social services will let you use the extra cash to take you and your son, then go for the option where you pay for Dsis. that is still within the rules and gets everyone on the trip.

I agree but you need to run it past ss to avoid future problems.
Hope it all works out

Surely your sister is respite of sorts. It doesn't have to mean they fully take over, surely having a helper to do things that wouldn't otherwise be possible is fine?

I don't know the rules but morally it should be encouraged. I think you should be able to spend the excess on anything he wants or needs.

It seems to me that she qualifies as respite.
By all means go, and have a wonderful experience!!

That is such terrible advice. You know absolutely nothing about the direct payment system. If she did this, she would be found out at audit and lose the provision altogether; not to mention she would have to pay the money back,