Sorry you are feeling bored and flat Op 💐
1.Definitely get a blood test to rule out physical causes such as lack of iron, vit d deficiency, thyroid problems, type II diabetes, lack of B12, and depending on your age, menopause, or peri-menopause.
2.And maybe while you are there, take the opportunity to fill in one of those tests to determine whether you have depression or not? You don’t have to feel sad to be depressed. It can be quite a physical disease. You can just feel tired, flat and grey with no motivation. You can still function but it’s like walking through treacle with no joy or satisfaction in life.
3.Then look at your food, sleep and exercise and tackle those things one by one. Cut down on sugar first of all. Make sure you eat your five a day, Go to bed an hour earlier. And take one 30 minute walk a day. Drink more water. Just small changes.
4.Gratitude journal every night. Three things.
5.Habits not goals. I think people are asking if you have a partner or children, because for those of us who do, having to do stuff for them helps to keeps us motivated as it gives us structure, Eg the school run is non negotiable so it gets done, day in and day out, Some days we don’t want to but there’s no choice, It’s often easier to do stuff for others than it is for yourself! Eg cooking healthy food for dc .
Extrinsic motivation is much easier to come by than intrinsic which is a lot harder to cultivate and maintain. So try and create your own with a diary or a timetable and follow the same before and after work routines every day until they eventually become automatic. Another one for weekends.
It’s cheesy but think about being kind to your future self. Eg Put your exercise clothes out every night so they are easy to jump in to the next morning. Meal plan for the week ahead. Only sit down at night to watch tv or turn on a screen when these tasks are done! And set an alarm an hour before bed to wind down sufficiently. Or acquire a dog who will get you out of the house twice or three times a day, rain or shine and impose a different structure on your life,
The Flylady or TOMM systems of household management might help too. I liked the way Flylady allocates a different focus to each day of the week. And I have added in a similar food category:
MONDAY : an hour’s home re-set and blitz clean
Dinner = easy leftovers from weekend
TUESDAY: planning and play eg booking hair or dentist appointments, meal planning, holiday booking/ evening class or hobby
Dinner = veg night 1
WEDNESDAY: anti-procrastination - do stuff you have been putting off - the secret is usually in the stuff you have been avoiding
Dinner = tray bake
THURS: errand day; confine your maintenance appointments to one day of week where possible eg car or hair
Dinner= veg night 2
FRI: clean out handbag and car (but could be change bed, laundry night, clean fridge)
Dinner = fish
SAT: friends and family/cleaning if you work all week
Dinner = healthy fakeaway or go out
SUN: rest and pamper yourself and do something that brings you joy and fulfilllment.
Pub lunch and walk with a friend and or small roast chicken for week ahead.
(you can adapt these headings to suit yourself)
6.No one hates themselves to success! So treat yourself gently and with kindness. There’s probably a reason behind your lack of motivation and weight gain eg that you are exhausted, or at a crossroads, or are feeling uncertain about something. Re-frame tasks so instead of having to do something, you get the opportunity to do it. Build in rewards and treats. Forty five minutes of housework = one episode of a Netflix series. Start a new hobby. Think about things that bring you joy. Think about your purpose; a therapist might help with this. Reflect on the reasons why you feel stuck? Depression can arise for example when you are living the wrong life for you. Often, the bleakest times, lead to change!
Good luck 🌺. Don’t wait until the motivation arrives though because it rarely does! You have to force yourself to start initially, then future motivation and energy comes from the previous achievements, even if they are just five minute tasks!