AIBU to let DS16 go to a rave

[SassyBear2]

DS16 and two of his mates want to go to a rave in Oxford during halloween. They also invited a lot of girls they know. The rave is for 16-18 year olds. The rave hosts also promise that no alcohol will be served. The rave is supposed to last from 5-9pm yet my son is insisting that he wants to stay in Oxford until 1am and then hell return home by train. AIBU to not let him go? The rave is until 9pm so why is he trying to stay to such late hours? I told him he'll be allowed to go as long as he lets me pick him up as I don't want him wandering alone at night.

I wouldn't be allowing my 16 year old out at 1 am. If the rave is supposed to finish at 9 pm, then what's he meant to be doing afterwards? Bars/clubs will be open to 1 am (and longer) but not much else! I certainly wouldn't be having him wandering around until that time either. How long is the train journey? I know it's a difficult age, they think they're grown-up but in reality they aren't. He's also under 18, so a minor, and your responsibility. My guess is he's planning on going elsewhere after the rave!

I think putting those safety parameters in place is fair enough. Is he familiar with the area or will it be the first time he’s going there alone? What’s he like generally with parties?
this would shape how much freedom I’d allow.
I would probably have similar expectations to you though and be picking him up 10/11 or expect him back by 11pm. Not 1am!

There's not a snowballs chance I'd let him go. 100% nope.

The definition of a rave has certainly changed since I was his age!

Ah , so at least you found out why he wanted to go to Oxford.

I think we'd have called this a disco 😂

I'd let him go but home by 11pm.

Blimey, the raves I used to go to involved random fields in the middle of nowhere, alcohol, drugs and mud.
Police usually arrived to break it all up!

I wouldn't let him go because it sounds lame

Agreed.

A rave should be a rave. A proper rave. (I don’t take drugs now) but a proper rave is all night, on the E’s.

🤣🤣🤣

Exactly what I thought! I was 16 in the 1990s when raves were proper raves (and all this were fields etc). The idea of a 'rave' starting at 9pm would have been laughable, let alone finishing then. He'll be fine, let him have fun.

Just googled and the rave itself looks fine I think saying it fine to go bout you then want to collect him is a perfectly fine

maybe compromise on collecting at 10-11?

No way! 90s teenager here so absolutely not.