What do you really think of second hand for kids?

[thewalrus3]

I get at least 50% of my toddlers clothes from Vinted. Probably more. She does get brand new things too and I love the clothes in places like H&M and Zara but I cannot justify the cost when I know things are likely to get stained and ruined, or grown out of quickly. I get a lot of my own stuff from Vinted too so it’s not like I’m decked out in designer gear while my toddler is only getting second hand.

I have a friend who is very aesthetic focused and her and her dd always look perfect. She hasn’t said it directly to me but we’ve had conversations where she’s made it clear she’d never dress her dc in second hand anything.

I suppose it makes me feel a bit embarrassed and inferior. Not that I’ll stop doing it because we’ve had some great bargains. Does it really matter?

All my children's clothes come from Vinted. I buy mainly high end brands, almost new, and it costs me less than if I bought everything new from H&M.

They always look fabulous.

I have also started selling their old clothes on Vinted. Sometimes I manage to re-sell things I bought on Vinted in the first place, for pretty much the same price I paid for them.

Apart from underwear and socks, I buy almost everything for the DCs second hand. I only ever buy decent things for them and no one would ever know unless I told them. I also buy second hand for myself.

Yes me too. I have a huge number of second hand items in my wardrobe and always look on Vinted when I want something new rather than in the shops first. My kids are older teenagers now but also massive Vinted fans and when they were little some of their favourite things were either handmedowns from friends with older children, or charity shop bargains. My DD was about 6 when I bought her the most goergeous purple party dress which was originally Monsoon and must have cost a packet new, she wore it loads and cried when she grew out of it.

We are however not struggling for money and this is a choice. I am concerned about fast fashion and the impact on the planet. I do know other people who think like your friend - my SIL for example. She works in a stable but not terrible well paid job and although they are not struggling, they don't have loads of excess cash sloshing around. She is very concerned about not appearing "poor". She won't even take old clothes into the charity shop in case someone sees her. Her daughter in her 20s won't shop in the sales in case someone thinks she can't afford full price. She wears as many visible logos as she can to signal where she's shopping.

According to this link https://www.wrap.ngo/resources/report/textiles-market-situation-report-2024 we each throw away 35 items of clothing each year. Into landfill. OUTRAGEOUS.

Charity shops are far better imo when you can see exactly what you are getting. Don't have to pay for postage either or deal with dodgy Vinted sellers/rubbish delivery companies. But I guess I'm lucky with some great quality charity shops in my local high street.

I think it's really good to get the kids involved in this early as well. My son really wanted some beast quest books and I showed him how many he could get on marketplace for the same cost as getting 1 in the shops... he understands how to get his pocket money to stretch further.

Of course sometimes it's worth a splurge or there's a specific things you want and it's good to also support local businesses and such... but for so many things it's really worth thinking twice.

Mumsnet seems to me to have a skewed demographic of people whose friends and family comment and criticize their choices and actions and then feel they need validation from the internet

Unless I'm missing that it's some kind of device to stir up debate why does it matter if they make a different choice? You do you as the saying goes

I buy all of my toddlers clothes for nursery from vinted. I buy bundles of leggings, t shirts and jumpers whenever she sizes up. She comes home covered in all sorts from mud to paint to PVA Glue. I then wash them, throw out any that are beyond repair and donate them to charity shops when she sizes up. She has brand new socks, knickers, shoes and outfits from me for going out and at the weekends.

I have a friend who recoiled at me when I told her this, i just let it go over my head. It really doesn't matter, clean dressed and fed kids are the important thing.

It just depends on your personality really.

My DC were dressed exclusively in hand me downs until they were about 5, and I was still getting hand me downs until recently - DC are 9 and 13. Most of my family handed them down & it was normal.

My SIL (DH's DSIS) everything has to be new, and designer. Her DS is 12 and nothing has changed. All her clothes are designer & hideously expensive. She considers her childhood traumatising because she didn't have designer gear.

But she also stays in 5 star accommodation while we choose older, cheaper accommodation. She works relentlessly to pay for it & her DH is the same. We prefer a more relaxed lifestyle & more free time.

I only hate how she turns he nose up at our lives.

When we had kids we went to all the mother and toddler groups. Was fantasic... everyone passed on useable clothes, some items of clothing went through 5 or 6 families.

I remember a pair of printed orange dungarees and a snowsuit that were still going strong when we left.

My girls loved it when a mum came round for a playdate with a binbag. Especially if they had older girls.

Don't know if the giveaway chains still exist now with vinted etc.

All the middle class parents I know love second hand clothes. Better for the environment to reduce waste. It's nice to have them in new clothes some of the time, but my toddler grows so fast and ruins clothes so regularly, I have to keep new things for weekends when I can keep an eye on imminent messiness!

@MissScarletInTheBallroom my toddler is a muck magnet. Since they could walk, nothing has been fit for reselling, however carefully I strain remove. I've reconciled myself that old clothes will go to friends as nursery spares!

Londoneach1 there is plenty for that age on Vinted.

When DC1 was little, she had a mixture of second hand purchases, hand-me-downs from friends and new items bought a year ahead in end of season sales, with the proportions split fairly evenly. DC2 had very little new to her as she got all her sister's outgrown clothing. She would have the odd T-shirt etc that was bought specifically for her as it had a favourite character on it. It just didn't make sense to buy everything new when there is so much already floating around the system in great condition and a fraction of the price/free. The bits I bought new in the sales were better (harder wearing) quality brands than I could otherwise justify spending on, but the sale reductions brought them in line with supermarket prices and they often made it through both DCs then either passed on or sold.
Toys and books were often second hand too, and although toys are now being quickly outgrown, books are still mostly second hand (they get through too many to buy them new!).

They are now 9 & 11yo and are very comfortable with receiving second hand items.
The 11yo's wardrobe is now over 50% friend's hand-me-downs, with the rest split between new and Vinted. When she wants/needs a particular item, she now will find a few on Vinted and send me the links, then we'll go through them to find the best of the bunch. She likes the environmental aspect to this, but also understands it means we can use the money saved for other things or, when it is something completely non-essential that we wouldn't get her outside of a birthday/Xmas, she can afford if with her pocket money. It has become harder to buy new in end of season sales and put it away for the following year now unless it's basics, but she gets less brand new these days so it isn't a problem to buy the few new items at full price as needed.
DC2 has a similar proportion of new:second hand as her sister, but I still do the Vinted legwork for her. She has different tastes and body shape to her sister, so will get a few items brand new to reflect that.

A good number of friends do similar and I always have a few very happy recipients of our outgrown clothes, so I don't think it's terribly unusual to dress DCs in second hand, but maybe it's just a case of 'birds of a feather'?

I used a mix bag of second hand /new.

No one would have known which is which. And to be honest after be covered in paint at nursery after enjoying herself it really didn’t matter.

I have no idea whether my friends use second hand/new clothes. Though my close friend does get some great bargains from vinted.

More importantly I wouldn’t judge/mention it either way. Doesn’t affect parenting so completely irrelevant.

I don’t dress my kids with any kind of aesthetic. Mostly they choose their own clothes. But unless a friend gives me hand-me-downs, and I do have a few that give me some great stuff then I buy it all new because I honestly can’t be bothered with trawling Vinted, buying bits individually, waiting ages for delivery if the seller remembers to ship it at all and then finding out it doesn’t actually fit. Far easier to just do a bulk order from H&M, Next or Zara (my 8YO mostly wants Zara stuff these days). I don’t think any of those type of normal high street brands are expensive but I guess that’s relative. I’d never judge anyone else’s kids clothes so long as they were activity and weather appropriate. When we’re done with the clothes and presuming they’re not trashed and only fit for the bin I pass them on to a family friend for her kids.

I don't bother trying to re-sell basics, to be fair. It's only really worth my while for nice brands, and realistically that tends to be clothes they wear less often. Everyday leggings and T-shirts for nursery, or jeans with holes in the knees, no, it's not worth it. But I'm a bit of a sucker for buying lovely little dresses for my daughter, which she doesn't wear that often, and for that sort of stuff it's definitely worth buying something from a nice brand on Vinted for 15€ and trying to re-sell for the same price.

My son is at school, they don't wear uniform, and I buy him good quality jumpers from nice brands, stain treat them as soon as possible, and sell those on after he's outgrown them. Trousers tend to suffer a bit more wear and tear, so I generally donate those.

I buy the more expensive stuff second hand, so coats mainly. I never see the point in 2nd hand everyday clothes because I've never found them much cheaper.

If I was looking for an occasion dress, Christmas jumper or something 'non-everyday' for DD I'd always check second hand first. I'm an ebay girl though, I can't get on with vinted.

I’ll buy some clothes for them from Vinted but only new with tags. Wouldn’t buy worn stuff. I wouldn’t wear someone else’s clothes so I don’t expect them to either.

I don’t find Vinted that cheap any more, right enough.

I basically only shop on Vinted now 😂 The kids are always beautifully dressed, it’s great for the environment and I’m spending pennies in comparison to buying new. What’s not to love? 💪🏻

Dressed our kids in secondhand, they’re 30 and 22 now. Wish more people would. There’s so much waste.

Always bought the kids clothes on Ebay, it meant they could have funky Boden and Swedish brands at prices I could afford. They are all nearly grown now and still buy their own clothes from Vinted or charity shops. My clothes are often second hand (as is my furniture).

I can't comprehend anyone who has an issue with this. It's saving money, there's more choice, I can often afford better brands and obviously it's better for the environment.
Do people who cringe about it never sleep in hotel beds? You know the sheets have been used by many, many people?

It doesn’t really matter no, but it seems from here it does as many are buying second hand high end items and passing them off as new.
keeping up with the Jones for sure

It makes no difference other than being cheaper and better for the environment.
My DC, when little, dressed exclusively in second hand clothes. I wasn't worried about paint, glue, pen or food being on anything they wore to nursery.

Dump the "friend". Children should be clean, warm, and tidy, not aesthetically curated like her own personal Barbie doll. Never mind Vinted, get yourself to the charity shops. Near me there are huge bins full of children's items for 50p or less, ( one place it's 5 items for £1) many of them virtually as new, you just need to rummage to find what you like, then chuck them through the wash. Kids grow like weeds, and also if you've paid so little for clothes, it doesn't matter so much if they get ripped or filthy, so they can properly play without worrying.

I wasn’t a huge fan of buying second hand when DD was young. I did try it a few times but it quickly became obvious that what some people considered to be “excellent condition” is definitely not what I consider to be “excellent condition”! But I did sell my own DD’s stuff, or pass onto her cousin once she came along.

She is now wearing a second hand school uniform but that was gifted. Before this year I’ve always bought new, I have checked the second-hand shop but always found it to be poor condition. Her own school uniform I have mostly donated because I don’t consider that it was good enough condition to sell. Uniform doesn’t really last as long as other clothes because it gets so much wear.

Anyway the bottom line is that to me there is a price point, if I don’t think the item is good enough condition for the price being charged then I’d rather have new. It’s not about thinking I’m too good to have second hand, I will happily do so if cheap enough or free.

I think all of my children's clothes are 2nd hand from vinted, charity shops, relatives, friends. I find it absolutely batshit when people dress their children in brand new expensive clothes.

Dc1s nursery actually have an issue with parents bringing dcs in nursery in brand new clothes and complaining when they get food and paint and mud etc on them.