Am I going crazy?!

[Changedmynameforthis1234]

I will try and give enough detail without being too outing. Have changed my name for this.

My DH and my friend had a disagreement. Long story but DH thinks I should go NC. I have said I won’t as I think they were both out of order. I still have contact with my friend and still with DH but he doesn’t like that I have maintained contact with her.

I’ve started to notice that whenever I have text conversations with her via WhatsApp, DH is in a mood with me that day after. I don’t mention that I have been messaging her so how would he know?! I thought it was a coincidence at first but now he definately is in a mood every time I have been messaging her. Is there a way he could be seeing my WhatsApp conversations without looking at my actual phone? He seems to start sulking the minute I message her back.

I feel the subject of their disagreement may be very relevant here.

Your husband has no right to decide who you can or can't be friends with. Ignore him and watch out for that kind of behaviour.

Are you sure you're not also logged in on a laptop?

Could he have logged in to your whatsapp account on a computer or other device? If you open whatsapp and click on the three dots in the top right hand corner, does anything come up under 'linked devices'?

I’m deliberately being vague. But along the lines of having differing opinions on something and it ending up in an (alcohol fuelled) argument where they both weren’t kind. I was cross with both of them. My friend has apologised but DH has not. It’s part of the wider picture of his behaviour and planning to leave. I just feel like I’m going crazy. No linked devices on WhatsApp

There are also sneakier possibilities like key loggers and spyware apps - is he particularly techy? But it sounds like the relationship is breaking down anyway.