Work Golf Trip

[Kerrylass]

My colleague M40's has just advised me that he and my manager also M40's and 2 other colleagues both male are away this afternoon golfing. There is no business reason for them to do so, they will not be using AL, just an afternoon out. There will be 3 women remaining in the office.

In an effort not to drip feed - here's some additional info: -
The ladies don't play golf
2 of the party of 4 are more senior that me, one on my level and one junior.
This is not the 1st time they enjoyed such an event
My boss is flexible if i need an hour off here or there - rarely used however.
The fact that they are out of the office doesn't actually affect me and my work load.
The ladies don't get an equivalent outing.

AIBU - No skin off your nose - let the lads have their day out
YANBU - this is wrong and creates a mens club .

@KerrylassYeah that’s really annoying then if that is the case.

This - large corporate or small family firm? Equally unfair either way, but affects your options for doing something about it.

This is appalling. Even if the split wasn’t along male-female lines, it would be unfair to have outings on company time that were solely for staff who happen to share a hobby.

The fact that all the golfers are men and all the non-golfers are women makes it even worse and potentially discriminatory.

It’s the sort of thing that used to happen in the dark days of the 1970s ffs.

It would only be fair if the boss attended it too.
Otherwise he is still bonding with the men and not the women.
In fact it would be extremely patronising and emphasise the sexist hierarchy if the women were allowed their activity afternoon as a sop to their feelings but the boss continued to just enjoy his afternoon with the guys.

OK So an update.

Manager just popped his head in to tell me that he has promised that lads he will take them golfing. He justifies this by saying he is paying himself. Oh right i said....leaving that hang...he then adds he will take me and my 2 female colleagues to lunch next week. I said great, so we can have afternoon to go shopping after?... he smirks and raises his eyebrows in a way that tells me, he knows this is wrong but his doing it anyway. I said enjoy your day.

BTW this boss knows i'm not a push over. I'm the cranky one in the office. We all get on great but at the same time, no'one messes with me. The other woman is a people pleaser who wont say anything to the boss but will bitch about it after, and the other lady is almost retired and is resigned to whatever happens.

Im on tik tok for afternoon. Motivation is low understandably.

I would pick a NICE place for lunch, tell him we voted and it’s booked for Tuesday, and not one of you ladies go back to the office afterwards. Tell them that’s an order, and if they have urgent deadlines you will transfer to manager with a suggestion of which hard working man can cover it. Order a bottle of champagne as you sit down or wine if that’s if what the others prefer. Reinforce the don’t fuck with me message.

My friend specifically took up golf as she was so annoyed.

When they all got up to go one day, she left with them without saying a thing. Just picked up her golf clubs and followed them out. Asked where to meet them, and drove to the golf club.

I'd say you want to go golfing instead of lunch. On the outing I'd make a sly comment like "I'm so glad we're doing this. Hopefully we can split the group by something other than sex next time. Don't want to open yourself up for a sex discrimination lawsuit haha."

The message is then very clear and he can't do it again

I'd say, great we'll come with you and whilst you guys bond on the course you'll find us bonding in the clubhouse bar 🍸

Sorry I read m40 as the motorway