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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

School and reasonable adjustments

55 replies

PhoebeCat23 · 08/10/2025 15:44

My son has a lot of sensory needs which are impacting on his ability to go to school. I have to give him extensive sensory input before he goes to school and even this sometimes isn't enough. He reports it feels itchy and uncomfortable and (if we make it out of the front door), is pulling and readjusting his clothing the 15 minute walk to the bus stop. He wears bamboo underwear and socks which he has no difficulty with but school uniform simply does not exist in these materials. I have made efforts to soften the clothing to make it more comfortable which has helped a little, but not enough.

I have provided his school with an OT report outlining his needs as well as sharing his challenges around the uniform. They have allowed him to wear another top under his P.E. t shirt so it is not touching his skin directly but apart from that, are refusing to allow any further adjustments. They've just said he MUST wear school uniform and he MUST attend. I'm now being pulled over the coals because of this. I feel like a broken record repeating myself to them but just being ignored.

What on earth do I do? I have done everything I can possibly think of (but still open to ideas if I've missed something) to help him. I don't want to get into trouble but I'm at a loss as to what else can be done. They simply won't budge.

Advice and ideas much welcomed. 🙂

OP posts:
Gruffporcupine · 08/10/2025 20:43

Can you put some soft leggings or something as a layer underneath his school uniform? I used to hate how my school trousers felt so often wore tights under them, problem solved.

Unfortunately there are going to be times in life where he can't wear exactly as he'd like or prefer, so your energy is best spent working within the rules rather than picking huge battles with the school over this.

stomachamelon · 08/10/2025 21:50

I would also push to be assessed alongside talking to the school. It does sound more than sensory. It’s about the full picture and you can request as a parent (that’s what I did). I went to tribunal with one and the other two they just granted.

I just want to say though (respectfully) that in all my experience (several secondaries, send and PRU) reasonable adjustment is just that. Schools will be unwilling to bend massively if they have a stringent uniform policy because if they bend for one they will struggle to not bend for others.

I don’t mean this in any way combatively I am
just talking about real life experience. My sons wore skins under larger uniform that they needed due to sensory needs but did end up in SEN schools by year nine.

The school I work at now makes lots of recommendations for returning students (it’s a PRU and they come on placement) 90+ uniform ‘asks’ will be ignored for the greater good.
What did he do at primary?

Mywindow · 09/10/2025 09:40

So what happened last year in year 7? - d throughout primary?

ThatResearchTiger · 21/11/2025 14:49

Hey, hang in there. As others have mentioned, your child is protected by The Equality Act 2010, and the SEN Code of Practice requires schools to make reasonable adjustments to polices (such as the uniform policy). I have unfortunately been through this exact scenario with my child's secondary school, and they now have all adjustments in place. If you would like help writing an email to school let me know, I would be happy to help.

ThatResearchTiger · 21/11/2025 14:53

PhoebeCat23 · 08/10/2025 15:44

My son has a lot of sensory needs which are impacting on his ability to go to school. I have to give him extensive sensory input before he goes to school and even this sometimes isn't enough. He reports it feels itchy and uncomfortable and (if we make it out of the front door), is pulling and readjusting his clothing the 15 minute walk to the bus stop. He wears bamboo underwear and socks which he has no difficulty with but school uniform simply does not exist in these materials. I have made efforts to soften the clothing to make it more comfortable which has helped a little, but not enough.

I have provided his school with an OT report outlining his needs as well as sharing his challenges around the uniform. They have allowed him to wear another top under his P.E. t shirt so it is not touching his skin directly but apart from that, are refusing to allow any further adjustments. They've just said he MUST wear school uniform and he MUST attend. I'm now being pulled over the coals because of this. I feel like a broken record repeating myself to them but just being ignored.

What on earth do I do? I have done everything I can possibly think of (but still open to ideas if I've missed something) to help him. I don't want to get into trouble but I'm at a loss as to what else can be done. They simply won't budge.

Advice and ideas much welcomed. 🙂

Hey, hang in there. As others have said your child is protected by laws such as The Equality Act 2010 and the SEN Code of Practice. I went through the exact same scenario with my son, after a bit of back and forth I managed to get adjustments in place. If you would like help writing an email to request this, please let me know.

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