To be doing every morning

[riverrun43]

I'm still on maternity leave. I get up every morning with the kids, get them ready and make breakfast...my partner comes down at 8.. this morning I was up at 6 and he came down at 8.15.. I'm starting to feel a bit resentful about this?

He usually is very helpful and hands on with the kids.. he's the one earning ... I feel like I shouldn't complain but .. this morning it's grinding my gears.. AIBU?

I wake up half an hour earlier than DH on weekdays to sort Dd out for school. I get a lie in on weekends to make up for it. Can you do that?

Yes we alternate lie ins this weekend.. think im being unreasonable.. thankyou @User37482x

You should probably just have an open discussion with him, he can’t know how you feel if you don’t tell him and he might be willing to do one or two mornings. I don’t think he is BU though to be honest.

No I don’t think you are being unreasonable. I think you should do the bigger share of mornings as you’re on maternity leave but he should do a couple too. So you already alternate weekend lie ins which is good, then there’s 5 weekdays so you do 3 and he does 2.

YANBU and I think he is taking the piss and don't see why he shouldn't be getting up at the same time. Even if it's just to feed little one whilst you take some time for you or do some chores that are left over. I don't get this notion that because you are on maternity leave that you should be the one who has to do everything. It's for you to slowly get back to being yourself mentally and physically whilst looking after a baby.

I work PT and DH works FT. He earns approx 7 times more than I do. He gets up every other morning with the kids. I do the alternate days and we each have a lie in over the weekend. Whilst one is dealing with the kids breakfasts the other one is immediately getting ready and then we swap for the other to get ready and the dressed one helps the kids get packed for school. He also tends to hear them quicker than I do in the night and is out of bed before I even realise what's going on. We consider ourselves a team neither get privileges to lie around in bed whilst the other does everything else.

When the kids were younger and DD was doing 4am wake ups I'd get up with her for the day. However DH would get up with her at any other point in the night if needed to settle her. That was only because I could function with the earlier starts whereas DH is more of an owl.

Thankyou for your replies. @Whatshesaid96 this is the dream, you sound like you have a good man!

yes I think it is that thing of when you're rushing around on your own doing everything in the morning - getting the kids breakfast, getting them dressed etc - packing the buggy - then you walk past your bedroom and seeing DH is fast asleep I have to say it grates on me a little 🤣

Thankyou for your replies - good to know I'm not being completely unreasonable 😊🙏

To be fair if he is working and you currently aren't you should be picking up the slack

I think it depends on the age of your children.

If you have a school aged child and a small snoozy baby, I think it makes sense for you to do more - not all - mornings.

If you have pre-school aged children that aren't at nursery, you won't be getting a break in the day so you should split them.