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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Materialistic

39 replies

Amy34555 · 04/10/2025 16:46

My friend called me materialistic. We have different interests and different tastes. My interests are more expensive than hers

OP posts:
Bluevelvetsofa · 04/10/2025 17:03

Do you mind being described as materialistic? I suppose if you have more goods and chattels and they are more expensive than your friend’s, then it’s accurate.

FaceBothered · 04/10/2025 17:04

Did you post too soon?

Your OP seems to be missing something

Like more words 🤔

Createausername1970 · 04/10/2025 17:05

Is that a problem if you are materialistic? It's a description, not necessarily a critism.

CynicalSunni · 04/10/2025 17:07

Bluevelvetsofa · 04/10/2025 17:03

Do you mind being described as materialistic? I suppose if you have more goods and chattels and they are more expensive than your friend’s, then it’s accurate.

But materialistic doesn't mean having more stuff and that is more expensive than others have. It means prizing possessions and money over all else.

Some hobbies are just more expensive than others .

ForZanyAquaViewer · 04/10/2025 17:09

What’s your AIBU? If you’re asking if you’re materialistic (which wouldn’t actually be unreasonable of you, as it’s entirely your business) we’re going to need more information.

Bluevelvetsofa · 04/10/2025 17:13

But if you prize possessions and money over everything else, then you are likely to have more possessions and they are likely to be more expensive.

I suppose it’s a question of whether you object to being described as materialistic and whether you regard it as a criticism, or derogatory.

CynicalSunni · 04/10/2025 17:17

Bluevelvetsofa · 04/10/2025 17:13

But if you prize possessions and money over everything else, then you are likely to have more possessions and they are likely to be more expensive.

I suppose it’s a question of whether you object to being described as materialistic and whether you regard it as a criticism, or derogatory.

or you have a more expensive hobby that needs more equipment?

Doesnt mean more stuff means materialistic.

Materialistic is viewed un a derogatory way.

missmollygreen · 04/10/2025 17:21

Createausername1970 · 04/10/2025 17:05

Is that a problem if you are materialistic? It's a description, not necessarily a critism.

Im not sure how it could be anything other than a criticism?

This is not a AIBU though. Not sure what the point is.

Original poster
Amy34555 · 04/10/2025 17:24

I do have flashy taste and she called me materialistic so I said we have different interests and mine are more expensive than yours. She constantly makes sly comments and so I snapped and told her the truth. I could have said. It's not my fault for husbands a broke failure. If you keep making sly comments then I'm guna put u in your place. She's not really a friend just somebody I tolerate in my social circle

OP posts:
WestwardHo1 · 04/10/2025 17:24

Surely materialistic means placing a really high value on the acquisition of expensive stuff over things like friendship, community and care for the environment and it's absolutely a criticism.

I realise that sounds totally priggish btw.

WestwardHo1 · 04/10/2025 17:25

Amy34555 · 04/10/2025 17:24

I do have flashy taste and she called me materialistic so I said we have different interests and mine are more expensive than yours. She constantly makes sly comments and so I snapped and told her the truth. I could have said. It's not my fault for husbands a broke failure. If you keep making sly comments then I'm guna put u in your place. She's not really a friend just somebody I tolerate in my social circle

Yeah with that update I think I'm Team Friend.

UnhappyHobbit · 04/10/2025 17:28

Amy34555 · 04/10/2025 17:24

I do have flashy taste and she called me materialistic so I said we have different interests and mine are more expensive than yours. She constantly makes sly comments and so I snapped and told her the truth. I could have said. It's not my fault for husbands a broke failure. If you keep making sly comments then I'm guna put u in your place. She's not really a friend just somebody I tolerate in my social circle

I think labelling her husband a “broke failure” is probably a bit cruel.

Not sure what you want out of this thread in all honesty.

ForZanyAquaViewer · 04/10/2025 17:34

Amy34555 · 04/10/2025 17:24

I do have flashy taste and she called me materialistic so I said we have different interests and mine are more expensive than yours. She constantly makes sly comments and so I snapped and told her the truth. I could have said. It's not my fault for husbands a broke failure. If you keep making sly comments then I'm guna put u in your place. She's not really a friend just somebody I tolerate in my social circle

What is the point of this thread? What are you asking us?

FaceBothered · 04/10/2025 17:36

Amy34555 · 04/10/2025 17:24

I do have flashy taste and she called me materialistic so I said we have different interests and mine are more expensive than yours. She constantly makes sly comments and so I snapped and told her the truth. I could have said. It's not my fault for husbands a broke failure. If you keep making sly comments then I'm guna put u in your place. She's not really a friend just somebody I tolerate in my social circle

Does your social circle mainly consist of nursery children?

Original poster
Amy34555 · 04/10/2025 17:38

I'm asking if I'm being unreasonable. My other friends at the lunch went silent. Now I'm at home drinking wine thinking I don't want my friends to think bad of me, they know what she's like. I said it but they was all thinking it. I don't like and and she drives a kia lol

OP posts:
Original poster
Amy34555 · 04/10/2025 17:39

I don't like her I meant to put and she drives a kia lol hahaha ha

OP posts:
ruethewhirl · 04/10/2025 17:44

Amy34555 · 04/10/2025 17:39

I don't like her I meant to put and she drives a kia lol hahaha ha

You sound absolutely awful. And immature. If this is what you’re like generally I’m surprised you have any friends.

Createausername1970 · 04/10/2025 17:45

missmollygreen · 04/10/2025 17:21

Im not sure how it could be anything other than a criticism?

This is not a AIBU though. Not sure what the point is.

Show quote history

I was trying to be diplomatic 🤣. But having read the OPs updates I don't know why I bothered.

Pinkissmart · 04/10/2025 17:45

What’s wrong with a Kia?
You sound superficial

FaceBothered · 04/10/2025 17:47

Pinkissmart · 04/10/2025 17:45

What’s wrong with a Kia?
You sound superficial

Is 'superficial' code for drunk? 😏🍷🍷🍷

Sunshineismyfavourite · 04/10/2025 17:51

You do sound materialistic and superficial and a bit bitchy to be honest. If you don't like her why are you spending time with her? Life is too short for that.

DancefloorAcrobatics · 04/10/2025 17:52

Are you a show off?
There is a difference in liking good quality expensive things and quietly enjoying them and rubbing it into everyone's face at every opportunity!

Crazycatladywithnocats · 04/10/2025 17:52

What do you drive then if your friend drives a mere Kia?

Zempy · 04/10/2025 17:53

The way you are coming across in this thread is way worse than “materialistic” to be honest

Pebbles16 · 04/10/2025 17:57

I wasn't going to bite but I will - because I am bored - @Amy34555 you aren't coming across well.
It's all well and good liking nice things, labels etc and that's you. That's fine, but criticising someone for their husband and their car is shallow and cruel.
Fine you don't like her, so give her a break and don't engage/meet up with her. She is not your friend and you are certainly not hers.