AIBU to complain about my old dentist?

[Dentistdilemma14]

Bit of background – about 5 months ago I finished Invisalign. It was actually my dentist who suggested it – I’ve always hated my smile, and she said it would make a big difference. I wasn’t sure at first, as I was only asking about teeth whitening, but after her mentioning it frequently during appointments, I decided to go for it, wore the retainers religiously for 10 months, and paid around £3k.
At the end, I was actually quite pleased with the results. But at my final appointment there was a trainee in the room, and in front of her my dentist said:
“[OP] is not someone I’d normally recommend this treatment for due to her teeth, but she begged me for it. She definitely isn’t someone I’d put in my before/after portfolio.” And she was laughing about it.
I was gutted – both because I’d been pleased with the result, and because it felt humiliating. Plus, she’d been the one pushing me to do Invisalign in the first place!
I mentioned to the receptionist afterwards that I was really upset, and she said I could either complain or just switch dentists. I decided to just quietly switch.
Fast forward to today – I went with DP and the kids to their appointment at the same practice. I stayed downstairs with DC while DP went up with them. My old dentist came down, looked surprised, and asked why I was there. I played dumb and said “just here with the kids, DP booked it.”
She then said “but they’re my patients?” – I brushed it off, because I didn’t want the kids (who are little) to pick up on any tension or negativity.
But then when I went to pay, in front of the receptionist and my kids, she said:
“You bloody bitch, you’ve got a new dentist.”
I was visibly shocked and just said “I didn’t book it.” She then sort of backtracked and said she was sorry if she’d offended me before.
Now I’m torn – part of me wants to put it all behind me and just stay with the new dentist. But part of me feels that being called a “bloody bitch” in front of my kids and the receptionist is completely unacceptable and I should complain.
I also can’t help but worry about rocking the boat, as it’s still the same practice and I don’t want to risk any awkwardness if another dentist there is treating me or my DC.
So AIBU to make a formal complaint about her behaviour, or should I just let it go and move on?
Maybe she was trying to be funny, but it really didn’t land.

She's clearly a lunatic. "Bitch" is a slang expression for a prostitute. Report the hell out of her. She sounds like she's having some kind of mental breakdown as no professional in their right mind would act like this.

That's really weird, I think i would say something to the manager.

I’ve never complained about a medical professional in all of my 51 years.
But you’d better believe I’d be complaining about her! She’s deranged.

I’m a dentist, and was fully prepared to say YABU as often on here patients want to complain about things that are normal. Having read your post, YANBU at all! That’s shocking.

Was she joking - like does she think you have that kind of jokey relationship?? Because if not that is an absolutely mental thing to say.

So I would often try to make her laugh (my personality is a bit like that), however, she was always so serious. She never really reciprocated in laughing.

However, I hate complaining as I hate the idea of someone getting in trouble as an adult. That’s why I just thought it would be easier to switch dentist. However, I was so taken aback. It was the fact she swore at me in front of my 2 young children. Maybe she was trying to be funny right enough.

It's incredibly inappropriate. That's beyond joking. Remember she's a professional. Complain, whatever is going on with her needs to be addressed by the practice.

Totally agree. This is not appropriate to say to a patient and if the dentist is in a difficult place then a complaint to the practice manager may be a push to get some help or highlight other places where inappropriate things are going on.

In all my decades of practice I have never talked to a patient like that and nor have any of my colleagues despite intense provocation and aggressive , intimidating patients and those who were threatening or personally insulting.

It may be this dentist needs help and a letter to the practice manager may start that process.