For thinking there’s no hope for me

[temporaryusername01]

I’m currently unemployed. No skills I can think of and 43 years old.

I have one primary school aged child and one secondary school aged child.

Having no money is really depressing me, I’m on universal credit but it’s not stretching and I spend a lot of time walking to cheaper supermarkets, researching cheap clothes and essentials on Vinted or freecycle etc. Looking up food banks, applying for bursaries for kids activities.

I really want a job but I don’t know where to start, my last jobs were 15 years ago in basic admin and I can’t find the contacts to get references. I do have reasons for not being able to work until now (caring responsibilities) but now I’m desperately job searching and not having much luck.

I can’t study because I used up my student finance trying to study but never graduated. Highest qualification is GCSEs.

I really want to make a change but a big part of me feels like I’m too old now and I’ve wasted my life.

Am I being unreasonable to think i have no hope of having a career at this stage?

Have you thought about going into care?

Sorry-I mean the care industry. You could work yourself up.

Have you thought about volunteering? You’d gain skills or at least experience and get references from that. Could you help at the younger child’s school, they’re always desperate for parent readers. Or a charity shop. Or a food bank.

Try retail op

There are plenty of industries and a range of roles where you can start at the bottom and progress by experience and training on the job into team leader and managerial roles: business services, admin, retail, sales, care.

What have you recently been applying for? If you aren’t sure what you want to do and are just using a scattergun approach in your applications then it’s likely that your applications are missing the mark a bit because they don’t appear tailored or focused enough. Do you have any friends or relatives who work in any of the areas you’re applying for who could do a bit of a CV review with you?

Ask the job centre to sign-post you to the local resources offering back to work help. They can help you put together a CV and show you how to apply for jobs online. Also visit "back to work schemes" on the government website.

Go to jobs fairs or local recruitment drives for supermarkets, etc.

Retail or hospitality? Retail in particular is have great career pathways. I know executives at international chains who started on the shop floor.

Retail/hospitality/care work will always be hiring people with little to no experience. I also know that Vodafone provide part time contracts in sales for people with kids, it would be on the phone but I believe the hours are between 10 and 2, that would have decent earning potential due to commission

Cleaning? Pretty flexible and decent pay

You would get a job in retail no problem. Also care homes are crying out for applicants. Minimum wage is now £12.21 an hour, so would make a real difference to your circumstances. Good luck!

Have you had any advice from the jobcentre?
Volunteer somewhere, at interviews you'll be asked to tell them about a time you dealt with a difficult customer/met deadlines or whatever.

You're only 43! You could be working for half your life again before you retire.

I agree with pp, this is exactly the scenario the Job Centre should be helping with, tbh I think it's a bit shit they've just left you languish on UC without pushing you to think about developing yourself.

Pps have suggested retail and now is the exact time of your shops will be looking for extra staff for Christmas. I'd try applying everywhere in your local area - ideally they'll keep you on after but if not at least it's good experience.

At this time of year shops are recruiting for Christmas. In my experience a lot of the time Christmas temps are kept on and made permanent and even if they didn't you'll have something in your pocket, a little experience under you belt at the busiest time of year and references. Volunteering won't give you any money but it may put you at an advantage when you go for paid work as it shows initiative and a willingness to work. Try The Open University if you want to train, they offer flexible or part-time studying and there are certain courses that you can get a second student tuition fee loan for. This link shows you the list of qualifications you can get a second loan for: https://www.open.ac.uk/courses/fees-and-funding/equivalent-qualifications/

You could try a job on care, or retail (specially this close to Christmas), or set up a cleaning company either domestic or foreign office spaces, pet sitting/walking jobs.

Are you getting rejected for retail and care work? struggling to see why there is no hope form what you’ve said

Go into a profession where no experience necessary and training is provided …
You will need certain GCSE’s of C and above

You might start with a Christmas temporary job. There are lots about at the moment. Having some recent work on your cv, even if it's temporary, will increase your chances of getting something permanent. Also, talk to a work coach at the Jobcentre about upskilling courses. They're free.

Of course you're not too old. Firstly you can get a job, you could work for yourself cleaning or dog walking or childminding. Find some free courses online to help with your CV. Volunteer at the job bank. Contact local care homes and find out if they're recruiting, you've lot's of experience. Nothing is stopping you.

OP when I had no work experience and limited school qualifications I started volunteering at a charity shop chain. I showed them I was serious by volunteering 4 days a week for 4 hours per day, so essentially like a part-time job, and when a vacancy came up they literally just offered me the job without needing an interview or anything because they already knew my work ethic was great and I knew how all their systems worked.

I worked up to being a shop manager in that role and the experience I got there led to me applying for public sector roles and I now have a stable career with progression opportunities.

It's daunting when you've been out of work but try not to dwell too much on the fear. Put yourself out there and someone will snap you up. And once you have some employment experience you'll instantly have more opportunity to apply for other jobs.

My other suggestion is to apply to temping agencies. They can build up your experience and stints of work for a specific company often lead to opportunities for permanent employment.

what are your best qualities? What are you good at? Enthusiasm and being personable will go a long way. Sounds like you have caring experience. Many schools are crying out for decent learning support assistants. Could you set up as a childminder? Have you considered being a foster carer if you have a spare room?

What would you like to do?
With Xmas coming up lots of shops especially supermarkets are taking on staff. I’d apply for absolutely everything and hope to get something, even if it isn’t ideal, aim to do it for 6 months so that you have a decent recent reference and get used to being in work, it will feel exhausting at first. From there it will be much easier to look for something you’re more interested in.

How are your IT skills? Could you brush up on them, I know a lot of colleges offer short courses in IT, Customer service for people on UC.

I’ve said yanbu because I think “career” is stretching it, but “work” is very achievable. I’m sure there’s a lot you could do.

Can you drive?
do you have a pass at gcse maths and English?
are you limited to school hours for work? Could you work nights (is older dc old enough to babysit?)

Agencies that provide temporary workers might be a good starting point. You might be placed in a variety of positions and you could find yourself employed in a very suitable area.

Do not put yourself down. Your skills are very varied: caring, scheduling tasks, budgeting, co-ordinating people, smoothing over disputes, listening and remembering what was said and by whom. These are all very useful skills in the business world and all part of everyday life.

Thanks so much everyone, I’m feeling lees doomful after reading all these encouraging replies!