It's 2057...

[snurtifier]

I'm trying to persuade my care robot to let me have a glass of wine, still struggling to get used to the taste of locust burgers. Apparently I don't have enough social credit since it overheard me being rude about the CCCP. Never mind, I'm glued to Elon Musk's live stream from Mars. Who knew that building a whites-only city in space would be so hard, eh.

What are you up to?

Hopefully I’m dead.

I was thinking the same thing 😂 I'm terrified of dying but I also can't wait to be off of this planet

I’ve just been to DFS and can confirm the sale is still on.

Walking through the woods marveling at the Autumn colours. Get home by jetpack. Greeted by robo-dog.

😂😂

We’ll ALL be dead at the way the worlds going

or we could have figured out we actually are living in the Matrix as loads of scientists now think we are living in a simulation. Fuck.

Also hopefully dead.

Still waiting to see if Wills and Harry will ever speak to one another - not

It's wonderful. Smart phones and the internet caused the total breakdown of society. Porn addiction became epidemic in men and boys and saw a catastrophic plummet in marriages and birth rates. AI and misinformation caused political unrest and threatened war. Smart phones were banned and the internet was only accessible in libraries. Families reconnected and communities are thriving.

I’ll be 65. So a good 30 years off the state pension.

Strictly Come dancing is on TV.
The England mens football team has yet to win a world cup, but apparently its still "coming home" soon. Meanwhile the womans team regularly wins things but apparently "they aren't as good"
Trump is on his latest presidential reign

I’m 83 and just starting to dread yet another fucking Christmas.

Ken Barlow is still in Corrie.

Still concerned about the cost of living. Pack of Chocolate Digestives has just passed 100,000 newly devalued People's Currency Units that you can never access on your mandatory digital ID implant chip.

And toilet roll is now 2 cm wide.

I love how you've worded this comment. Sitting here giggling silently so I don't wake up my son 😂

Which recently? Thought only Musk?

I can’t believe Donald Trump is still president of the US, those longevity tablets he took back in 2026 are still working!

This really tickled me

I will be 87, younger than my parents death. I pray my soon to be husband and me can live the life we want.. I hope the Japanese diet will save me.

So glad to not be alone in this hope

I've just come back from the gym and about to go for a 5k run. Then back to have 'the chat' with DP about whether we should have another DC. He's keen, but I'm at a really pivotal point in my career and frankly since I'm not entirely sure about the safety of the DNA rejuvenating therapy in pregnancy, I'm in two minds. For the first time in my 95 years, I think I'm fully satisfied and I'm not up for changing yet. Plus we have the rest of eternity ahead of us now we know his death from old age was fully cured, so no rush.

I’d be 87, refusing to wear those Velcro slippers because they are for old people, taking bites out the cheese and putting it back in the fridge and wearing only purple!

It surely cant be any worse - besides, I’m a science purist - there’s no brain activity abx this I have zero awareness of- exactly what ive been trying to achieve for the past 35 years.

I am the Supreme Queen of England, France and the Netherlands. The last defence against tyrannical Trump Empire. Some voters are still wondering how thus African immigrant became Queen of England, France and the Netherlands. But I am as fair as I am ruthless and decisive. And they can't bear swearing homage to bionic Trump so they stick with me.

Have you outlawed Gin?

What? Donald Trump is 111 years old?
I am 94. Probably not though because I don’t think anyone in my family has ever lived to be 90 and I’ve just had surgery for breast cancer.