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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To go to the party?

13 replies

Offloadontome · 28/09/2025 07:43

Just in need of some quick advice! My DD (7) has been invited to a party at a child's home today.
The mum has text to say the birthday child's sibling has been sick last night, the party will go ahead and sibling will be out of the way but understands if people decide not to come. Birthday child is fine.
I would feel awful not going as I don't want the birthday child to be let down, but I also really don't want a sickness bug as that's what it implies! I've had a lot of time off work recently and DH will be away the latter end of this week, and I have another younger DC too.
Would you go, if the sibling was kept upstairs? Or not risk it and decline politely?

OP posts:
TellmethestoryofO · 28/09/2025 07:56

Is there another parent there who will be attending to the sick child out of the way?
if the weather is dry the birthday party could be mostly out in the garden so would lessen any risk?
But ultimately yes I’d still go.

BallerinaRadio · 28/09/2025 07:58

I'd probably go. If they've been conscientious even to text ahead I'd imagine that they've given everything a good clean and will keep the sick child out of the way

CinnamonBuns67 · 28/09/2025 08:03

No I'd not take my child. Been there done that and regretted the consequences as we all came down with the bug.

TinyTom · 28/09/2025 08:04

I’d go but take hand sanitiser and use it religiously!!

Moonnstars · 28/09/2025 08:04

No I wouldn't go, if they were hosting the party elsewhere and just letting you know about the sibling then I might, but not going into their home where children might be using the same facilities e.g. bathroom.

Original poster
Offloadontome · 28/09/2025 08:04

This was my thinking. I'm a bit apprehensive based on experience I think! because I once attended a party where the mother admitted (half way through) that one of her children (who was mixing with everyone else!) was sick in the night but was fine in the morning. Everyone else was fine but I was off work for a full week throwing up a couple days later.
Yes I'm so appreciative she has let me know and given the option!

OP posts:
Luxio · 28/09/2025 08:05

No I wouldn't take my child to a home where there is an ongoing sickness bug. I appreciate it's not nice to have to cancel these things but I think the parent is being unreasonable to still host the party and not to rearrange it which is easily done when it's a party at home.

SunshineAndFizz · 28/09/2025 08:06

It’s like an episode of Motherland 😂

Original poster
Offloadontome · 28/09/2025 08:08

Luxio · 28/09/2025 08:05

No I wouldn't take my child to a home where there is an ongoing sickness bug. I appreciate it's not nice to have to cancel these things but I think the parent is being unreasonable to still host the party and not to rearrange it which is easily done when it's a party at home.

She's clarified the sibling was only sick once and is eating drinking fine this morning, but has acknowledged you can't really know if it's something they ate or a bug. I do feel a bit torn! It's a drop off and my child says they still want to go even if they risk getting ill (of course 😂). I'm swaying to going and giving her some hand sanitiser. Maybe I'm mad.

OP posts:
Original poster
Offloadontome · 28/09/2025 08:08

SunshineAndFizz · 28/09/2025 08:06

It’s like an episode of Motherland 😂

Oh god!!! Hahaha! At least it's not the birthday child 🙈

OP posts:
Allswellthatendswelll · 28/09/2025 08:11

I'd go as if you think about it your child will almost certainly be in a classroom with a child who has a sibling with a bug at some point. And it sounds like might not even be a bug. I know it's in their house but I'm sure they've cleaned.

Original poster
Offloadontome · 28/09/2025 08:15

Allswellthatendswelll · 28/09/2025 08:11

I'd go as if you think about it your child will almost certainly be in a classroom with a child who has a sibling with a bug at some point. And it sounds like might not even be a bug. I know it's in their house but I'm sure they've cleaned.

Yes, she is in the same class and it's bug season so no doubt she'll still be exposed to whatever it is at some point!

OP posts:
ThatGreenFawn · 28/09/2025 08:39

I would go, your child will be in the same class as birthday child tomorrow and the hygiene will be much less than at home.

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