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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be upset about receiving a further vet invoice

47 replies

Wickedwitchofthewest73 · 27/09/2025 11:05

Nearly 2 weeks ago our beloved pet had to be rushed to the vets in a very bad way. She had an emergency ultrasound and we were forced to make the horrific decision to euthanize. I was in that much of a state I just wanted to leave immediately and given the fact I've been a loyal customer for over 20 years,asked if I could pay tomorrow. This was agreed and the very next morning I called and couldn't get through on the phone so emailed to ask for the invoice. It was sent over so I paid it in full and let them know I had done so.
Fast forward to today I open the post and there's another invoice saying money is still outstanding. On closer inspection of the first invoice they sent they had not added a consultation fee.
I have sent them an email telling them how upsetting this is to receive when we are still grieving especially but surely the onus was on them to make sure it was correct in the first place?

OP posts:
CutiePieOk · 27/09/2025 11:08

You owe the money. Maybe as a goodwill they could offer half consult fee?

Arlanymor · 27/09/2025 11:14

It's unfortunate, but we all make mistakes and this could have happened in part due to the fact that it wasn't paid on the day and someone had to do the invoice at a later date. It's upsetting of course and I am very sorry for your loss, but you must recognise that mistakes happen, and that the emergency element might also have contributed to it. I think the important thing is that they treated your pet with the utmost care and attention when you really needed it, which I really hope that they did. Again, I'm very sorry for your loss, I am sure you are still feeling really raw which means that something like this hits harder than it would under another circumstance.

TheatricalLife · 27/09/2025 11:17

As someone who has also very recently lost my beloved dog of 13 years through euthanasia at the vet, YABU. I'm so sorry, it's an absolutely devastating time, but you've used a service that hasn't been fully paid for. Would there ever be a good time to ask for it? Probably not. If they had sent it in 6 weeks you'd have been upset at the memories of it all being dredged up. I hope you found the service they offered at the end of some comfort. It's a horrible time.

Saucery · 27/09/2025 11:19

I would expect to have to pay it, but I would also have expected to have a covering letter in with the second invoice acknowledging and apologising for their mistake.
My vet is excellent, but the finance section seems to be removed from the day to day care. I got a very snotty invoice telling me I hadn’t paid for a set of Behaviour classes when I actually had paid in advance. The clinical staff were extremely apologetic but couldn’t do much apart from insist the finance section went through the payments to look for the date I could prove I paid it, which they did, but glacially slowly. Maybe yours has a similar set up?
I’m sorry for the sudden loss of your pet, it’s horrible Flowers

34ransum · 27/09/2025 11:22

I don't understand why it's upsetting when grieving? It doesn't add to your grief, it's just an invoice for services provided. They need to contact you at some point and it sounds like they did it once they realised their error. You emailing them to complain seems OTT

Tunacheesequesadilla · 27/09/2025 11:27

I don't understand why this is upsetting when grieving either. I think yabu, but I'm sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is awful.

Herewegoagainandagainandagain · 27/09/2025 11:29

I would be embarrassed in hindsight to have sent that email. Pay the invoice and keep working on processing your grief rather than trying to abuse it to your benefit or to garner sympathy. It was a clerical error and corrected invoice, nothing more.

I know what it feels like to make that decision for a much loved pet, sorry for your loss.

bridgetreilly · 27/09/2025 11:29

They have a right to charge for their services, and you have an obligation to pay.

ThreePointOneFourOneFiveNine · 27/09/2025 11:33

They made a mistake, humans do that. You did push to get the invoice done in a hurry, and this may have contributed to something being missed. It’s understandable to be upset at having another thing connected with the loss of your beloved pet to arrive on your doorstep, but ultimately these things happen and you do have some control over how you allow it to affect you. Just pay the invoice asap and don’t think about it any more.

NoisyLittleOtter · 27/09/2025 11:36

Another one who is unsure why it’s upsetting while grieving? It’s a separate issue, and I can’t see why an invoice through the post would make the grieving process more difficult?

Swiftie1878 · 27/09/2025 11:37

Just pay it.

Sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is awful ☹️

LandSharksAnonymous · 27/09/2025 11:39

I agree with PPs.

The vet is , at the end of a day, a business. Whilst your loss is very sad for you - and it is awful to lose a pet - their business needs are their priority not your feelings.

MyDownstairsLooisHaunted · 27/09/2025 11:39

Just get it paid as soon as possible and then you can grieve in peace.

Pricelessadvice · 27/09/2025 11:39

But you owe the money. How long should they leave it before you aren’t upset?
It’s a business. It’s unfortunate that the original invoice missed a part off, but the fact is that you still owe it.

Newname71 · 27/09/2025 11:41

Saucery · 27/09/2025 11:19

I would expect to have to pay it, but I would also have expected to have a covering letter in with the second invoice acknowledging and apologising for their mistake.
My vet is excellent, but the finance section seems to be removed from the day to day care. I got a very snotty invoice telling me I hadn’t paid for a set of Behaviour classes when I actually had paid in advance. The clinical staff were extremely apologetic but couldn’t do much apart from insist the finance section went through the payments to look for the date I could prove I paid it, which they did, but glacially slowly. Maybe yours has a similar set up?
I’m sorry for the sudden loss of your pet, it’s horrible Flowers

I work in a dental practice. If we ever (very rarely happens) make a mistake with a bill we always call the patient and explain. We would never just send an invoice. So as you say a cover letter explaining the error at the very least should have been sent with the bill.

RogerR4bbit · 27/09/2025 11:49

I understand you’re grieving, but I can tell from your post that you’ve never had anyone close to you die and had to deal with the administration connected to that.

The “sadmin” connected to a death and a funeral of a loved one goes on for months, sometimes years, and yes it’s a kick in the guts every time you have to deal with it, but what is the alternative? Bills not getting paid? Legal documents not getting filed? Some you HAVE to get on with things, there’s no other alternative 🤷‍♀️

Sadly death is a part of life and so is human error.

I’m sorry for the loss of your pet, everything feels difficult when you’re grieving, but I honestly think you feeling angry with the vet is more a part of your grief than any wrong doing on their part.

Recoverypro · 27/09/2025 11:53

I know how upsetting it is to lose a beloved dog - I’m so sorry for your loss, the pain is unbearable. You think you are making progress but every reminder of what happened makes a massive impact on you emotionally, I get that people won’t understand that. We asked that our vet only contact dh about the ashes - they screwed up and called me - I was left in bits in a public place. It’s so so hard. I get it.

Original poster
Wickedwitchofthewest73 · 27/09/2025 12:19

I'm going to pay it obviously but the reason it's 'upsetting when grieving' is because day to day I'm trying to focus on moving on and not letting the loss consume my thoughts so much which is hard. So to open a letter unexpectedly is upsetting.
I think some pp are spot on. If they'd have sent an accompanying letter saying they were sorry they'd missed it off it would be acceptable. But no explanation or anything and if I hadn't have downloaded the previous invoice I would have had no idea what the extra amount was for.

OP posts:
NoisyLittleOtter · 27/09/2025 12:25

Wickedwitchofthewest73 · 27/09/2025 12:19

I'm going to pay it obviously but the reason it's 'upsetting when grieving' is because day to day I'm trying to focus on moving on and not letting the loss consume my thoughts so much which is hard. So to open a letter unexpectedly is upsetting.
I think some pp are spot on. If they'd have sent an accompanying letter saying they were sorry they'd missed it off it would be acceptable. But no explanation or anything and if I hadn't have downloaded the previous invoice I would have had no idea what the extra amount was for.

That’s just a part of life, sadly. As a poster upthread mentioned, when someone close to you dies you have months of admin related to the death to deal with (bank accounts, probate etc), you can’t just ignore it because you’re grieving. This is just a piece of admin relating to the death of your pet.

TheatricalLife · 27/09/2025 12:40

I do get it OP. I'm in the same place. Unfortunately, you do get a lot of reminders and you just have to learn to go with it in the end. Just this morning I had a reminder about my dogs feed subscription. Daily I get ads about the dog treats she liked and dog related offers from events I've been to and pages I've looked at. It will get easier, but it stings. I just try to remember that the good times far outweighed the bad, that you loved your pet and gave them the best life you could. I still think about my lovely girl I lost years ago, but it's in a nice way and not focused on the end. Get the bill paid and forget it. The more you engage with the vets the longer you'll be dealing with it. Lots of love to you.

CoffeeCantata · 27/09/2025 13:24

Vets are the reason we don’t have pets!

spiderlight · 27/09/2025 13:32

I'm so sorry for your loss. I understand why this has upset you - it does sound as if they could have handled it with a bit more sensitivity. Having lost our beloved dog in similar circumstances, I found all the admin/insurance afterwards really hard. Sending an unMumsnetty hug.

Glitchymn1 · 27/09/2025 13:33

I’m so sorry for your loss, I can see why it would be upsetting xxx

Chiseltip · 27/09/2025 13:39

Yeah, the staff who work there will find it just as upsetting to lose their jobs because the customers won't pay the invoices.

ConnieHeart · 27/09/2025 13:40

CoffeeCantata · 27/09/2025 13:24

Vets are the reason we don’t have pets!

What a weird comment