I have a good friend who I’ve known for the best part of 25 years. During that time, she’s had several long and short term relationships, all of which have been with a succession of ‘unsuitable’ men - they include the generally pleasant guy who had a massive, secret cocaine addiction; the married guy; the aggressive controlling guy, who put his hobby before herself; and the habitual cheater.
I’ve supported her through all the break-ups, helped her move, provided a shoulder to cry on and was happy to do so.
After a period of singledom, she’s met someone else. There’s a whole host of issues - he had a “mental” ex who causes him all manner of problems; he lives at her house but doesn’t contribute to the mortgage because his ex is apparently rinsing him for child maintenance; he flies off the handle at any little thing and subjects her to the silent treatment. She seems thoroughly miserable, and revealed she’s started seeing a counsellor.
I just want to shake her and make her wake up to the fact this relationship isn’t making her happy, he’s taking the piss, and she could do better. But what can I do? In the past, I’ve provided support but not got involved.
What should I do? If anything?