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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Couple of nights away - moaning

14 replies

Olderbutneverwiser · 25/09/2025 18:37

My and my partner have been together for 3.5 years. We have a 5 month little girl. I moved in last year. I only sold my house thr month before I gave birth. It needed alot of work done and also I work in the same area as house so stayed there a few nights a week when required in office (whilst pregnant!).
Anyway, my partner done most of the work to my house and I made 41k profit which was a lovely suprise as I was expecting to break even 😊

I said a number of times when I recieve my house sale money that I would treat us three (me, dp and little girl) to a little holiday. My partner said no, that he is happy with something cheap. Prior to this convo, I had told my partner that my colleague purchased a caravan that needed upgrades but said we were more than happy to use for a small price (20 per night!). After mentioning that I'd like to treat us to a mini break - either a week in Spain or a nice cabin somewhere in UK partner said he wouldn't mind the caravan. I was a bit suprised. I told him it was a haven caravan, it was not in the nicest area and it wasn't going to be luxury. He told me he would be happy going there. So we went! Although it only cost us £40. We've had to pay alot of petrol, buy food, and even buy a travel cot.. but we joked about how a £40 caravan break has cost us £100s (pets had to go into boarding too!). Since getting here, partner has moaned about the condition of caravan.. it has mould, its old, its cold, the park isn't nice, we haven't done anything. Etc. We went swimming with our little girl and took her to sensory. His mum and dad stays not too far so we went to a lovely pub with them and then had lunch with them before we went home.

It all came to head syesterday as he said he'd rather be camping than in the caravan.. I told him to stop exaggerating. He then got annoyed when I said we weren't leaving the portable heaters on overnight as its a fire hazard! He then wanted a logic argument from me., to justify my decision etc. Said it was disappointing I googled the reasons.

I told him I was happy spending time with them both and it was a little adventure.. he said he has wasted his annual leave, and hates that we did nothing that what we did that we can do at home. He said he's annoyed the caravan wasn't great condition and that our house is better. He then said it isn't an adventure and that he's travelled the world and that was an adventure .. not a caravan!
Ive told him he's ruined the last few days for me and if we didn't squeeze seeing his mum and dad in maybe we could have done more? He said I'm now blaming his parents! He said he was happy spending time with me and our little girl but he does that everyday and didn't need to go to a caravan for that.

Stroud isn't it? Am I being unreasonable or is he??

OP posts:
Olderbutneverwiser · 25/09/2025 18:45

Stroud = stupid... autocorrect!!

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Simonjt · 25/09/2025 18:50

You have a five month old baby staying in a mouldy and cold caravan?

Olderbutneverwiser · 25/09/2025 18:52

We stayed two nights.

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GreatEscape2 · 25/09/2025 18:52

He is unreasonable… you told him that it’s not great, apart of getting there it costed you £40, I would’ve asked him what did he expected for £40, Ritz?
You kindly offered to treat you guys for a proper holiday he said no… so what is his problem now.

Olderbutneverwiser · 25/09/2025 18:53

Thr caravan wasn't great but it was a change of scenery... but that's my problem apparently that isn't a holiday to him.

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RememberBeKindWithKaren · 25/09/2025 18:54

Has he got form for being a miserable grump? Sounds like you had a good time and my other half would be happy if I was.

Candleabra · 25/09/2025 18:55

You can barely buy a meal out for 40 quid so the price should have been a clue to him that it wasn’t a luxury holiday.

Olderbutneverwiser · 25/09/2025 18:56

Don't get me wrong. It reminded me why I dont like caravans! But it was a change of scenery, I had a lovely time swimming, I enjoyed the lovely pub lunch. I mean baby sensory was a rip off but baby girl enjoyed it

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Olderbutneverwiser · 25/09/2025 18:58

I bought pink fizz before we went and I thought it was nice having some bubbles and eating our donuts late at night chatting. He even said we could have done that at home. Yes we could have but you could say that about anything

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inamo · 25/09/2025 18:59

Are you living in his house now? I think..... he may be interested in a chunk of the profit of 40k you made on the sale of your house. 🤔He seems to have done some work on it for you (maybe you paid him for that). I presume you contribute to the running of the house (his I presume) that you are both living in.

I don't think this has much to do with a caravan break TBH. But I'm just thinking out loud.

Olderbutneverwiser · 25/09/2025 19:02

I bought him vouchers for his hobby. Im on maternity leave and he pays majority of bills - I've offered more money, he won't take it. Ive offered to pay house repairs for his house, he wont accept. As a result if we need something or we're out, I'll spend my money and not the joint account money. Apparently I shouldn't do that as we cant track our spend. I cant win.

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Olderbutneverwiser · 25/09/2025 19:02

I bought him vouchers for his hobby. Im on maternity leave and he pays majority of bills - I've offered more money, he won't take it. Ive offered to pay house repairs for his house, he wont accept. As a result if we need something or we're out, I'll spend my money and not the joint account money. Apparently I shouldn't do that as we cant track our spend. I cant win.

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themerchentofvenus · 25/09/2025 19:03

So you told your partner you wanted to go to Spain, he insisted you instead spent 2 nights in the caravan which he already knew was run down, then he spent the entire time moaning it was grotty and run down? YANBU!!

Olderbutneverwiser · 25/09/2025 19:04

I mean I didn't know the ins and out of caravan condition but said it needed work. I wasn't expecting much fir £20 per night!

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