Friends changed plans

[Magicnestdream]

My friend and I have always gone to certain concerts together over last 20+ years .
These tickets went on sale today and we agreed we would both try and get some and previously agreed how much we would spend if the other person was able to get first .
Online this morning and we had a call running as well so we could discuss as the tickets progressed ....
Lucky enough to get in 10 minutes and paid a little over what we would have liked but agreed happy to pay.
Previously also discussed options of standing which I said I'd rather not as post cancer treatment and get more tired standing for long periods.
Anyway tickets purchased and I transferred the money within half hour. Great.
...I then get a message after 2 hours later saying oh there's still standing tickets and these are only x amount and £70 cheaper than what we paid....would I have anyone in mind to buy her 2 tickets so she could then buy cheaper standing ones and I could still go with my daughter!! I was a bit taken back given previous discussions and said I may do but part of me things why should I?! The whole point is we were going together so whilst there is another person going with her, feel I've been binned off when it was our plans to start with. Appreciate everyone has different levels of money to spend but why agree then change your mind and basically bin me off. Would you be annoyed?
I've said she's obviously free to sell on and rebuy and I'll still go but feel pretty rubbish imo to be treated like that.
I'm mid way thru divorce and was really looking forward to this as well. As I said I can still go and will enjoy it but just feel it's totally rude
I want to tell her I'm annoyed and think it's rude....would you?? It's not the first time either...they make plans and often change/ cancel etc
She says we can still meet for drinks before but given different access points of venue makes it more tricky plus the point was we were going together!!

I’d be upset too , surely she can understand why you’d prefer to be seated ? If it’s take that then often the first few rows are available to sit down if you have standing tickets

Why wouldn't you tell her what you've said here?

Just be up front and say so you’re dropping me for another friend and leaving me to be on my own at this concert? Am I right?? Because that is really shitty behavior

Tell her no you don’t have anyone who could buy them and you thought you were all going together and don’t want to go by yourself.

So are you having to sit in the seats by yourself whilst she stands or are you taking your Daughter aswell ?

I think if you needed her to spend £70 more that she needed to for herself, then you should have offered to cover most, if not all of her extra cost. But that said, she should have told you earlier that she wanted to stand and save the money. She was wrong to go about it how she did, but she probably felt awkward about it.

Take That?!

Only ask as we had the same seating or standing discussion!

Yep last time I went they'd made all of the standing area seated anyway given the advancing age of the audience!

Agree with this^^

To clarify my daughter is also coming so wont be alone and my friends friend was also joining us as she didn't have anyone to go with so my friend asked if it would be ok which I didn't mind. So 4 of us .
We discussed costs before hand and agreed and she was the one who purchased them whilst we were on a call to each other so no pressure from me...even when they were more than we initially thought, but partly because we thought we may not get any at all. I also paid up straight away.

I have also suggested maybe some other seated ones further back for less money but then she's moaning that she'd be miles away from the stage!!

If she really wanted standing she could have just said from the outset .
I'm about to message but just wanted to get some other opinions as start to wonder if it's me sometimes but I'd never do that to someone when I'd made plans!!

Tell her you are really disappointed that you won't be together at the concert as you were really looking forward to having an evening out with her. She may not have realised that a big part of it was the being together as a social event, not just listening to the music.

I understand you're disappointed @Magicnestdream, thankfully though you'll be with your daughter, otherwise my response would be different.

You'll still be able to travel and meet up with her before and after the concert.

The onus on her though is that she is responsible for selling the seated tickets

Sure, but you also had the option of being upfront with her and saying ‘But I wouldn’t have bought the tickets at all if we weren’t going to be sitting together.’

you admit yourself that the tickets cost more than expected. It may be that it was too much of a stretch.

@AndSheDid we discussed seating/ standing before tickets went on sale and she was happy with seated. I also checked numerous times about cost/ date etc as she'd messed me around a while back wanting tickets and then decided not to go and wanted me to find a buyer !

I would tell her you're disappointed as part of the pleasure for you was going together. Are you still happy to go with your daughter/do you have other friends who might want the tickets? The onus is on her to sell the tickets, unless you know someone who would buy them. Perhaps she got carried away with the excitement of getting tickets, without really thinking about the cost/proximity to the stage?

But the seated tickets were more expensive than you were expecting, which you didn’t know until you were in the process of purchasing. You might have discussed it before but the higher price for seats she didn’t really want might have pushed her to change her mind.

I have also suggested maybe some other seated ones further back for less money but then she's moaning that she'd be miles away from the stage!!

You say this as if there’s something wrong with it. It’s completely normal not to want to be miles away from the stage. She was doing you a favour by booking seated at all when she’d prefer to stand. The fact that your dd is going changes things a bit. It’s not like your friend is ditching you so you’d have no one.

if you've got your tickets for you and your daughter Then I'd just let your friend sell the other 2. it probably isn't worth falling out over if you've got someone to go with and sit with. But what I wouldn't do is make any other arrangements with her As ylu said she's done this before. Next time there's an event that she wants to book tickets to I would just say no. go with someone more reliable.

@CopperWhite Her change in mind from the tickets we purchased to wanting then cheaper standing was due to cost. So on that logic I found some even cheaper ones which were seated as a compromise to save money but still be together. Appreciate it's further from stage I was just trying to look at other alternatives.

Oh dear, she's got form then. It's a rotten way to behave. But you can't make her stick to the agreement. I'd just accept it if she says that she's going to sell her tickets, but not be persuaded to say that it's fine.