To ask for your stories of taking a significant pay drop for a less stressy job?

[30GrandLessStress]

Dh and I have 4 primary aged dcs and both work full time in well paying jobs. My role is stressful, but up until 6 months ago, I found it really rewarding and enjoyable, which eased some of the sting around the stress, though obviously there was still a sacrifice regarding home/family life.

In the last 6 months, my job has gotten progressively more stressful and I’ve slowly grown to hate it more and more and more to the point where I don’t have the motivation to do it anymore. Home and family life has taken a severe hit because of the stress levels 🙈

I’ve been offered the opportunity to go back to a job that I did years ago, a very much ‘finish for the day and leave it behind’ role, that isn’t mentally challenging but has its own rewards (meeting people, out in the fresh air etc).

The less stressy role is about half my current salary, but due to the tax system where we live, in total, our household would only be down about 1k a month. I know this is a big amount, but I say ‘only’ because we the actual salary drop would be around 30k. I think we would manage ok, though would have to tighten our belts.

Funny enough, I originally left the less stressy job 12 years ago because I was disillusioned with the lack of progression. I’ve gone up the ladder and seen those bright lights now and that’s not all it’s cracked up to be either!!

I’d love to hear other people’s experiences and whether it worked out positively or negatively.

Well, I got sacked from a 'c' level job six months ago. For the first time in two decades I no longer have staff. Yes, it's less money. It's a pleasant office with nice people. I'm a bit bored, but I leave the office every day at 430 without a thought!

Sorry to hear that, but I imagine being able to leave without a care in the world is worth its weight in gold!

I left accountancy for a civil service job. Took a £14k pay cut, do about 2 hours of work a day so I’m quite bored and will probably not stay too long. It’s been nice to have a break though.

I think it depends how different the jobs are, how well your family can cope financially with the drop in income, and if you think it’s likely the stress in your current job might continue to worsen.

I urge caution because my DH was effectively pushed out of his last role by a full on demanding US company about 18 months ago. He quickly found a role for a much ‘nicer’ European company and the drop in income was about 30k gross. As he’s a higher earner the difference in income didn’t seem that massive initially …

However, over time we’ve all come to struggle with the belt tightening and resent it, particularly as the role is pretty similar to the first - and any job brings a level of stress.

This is my point about similarity. If you’re quitting being an A&E doctor to become a gardener, then the stress levels are so different it might be totally worth it. But if it’s the difference between being a consultant and a registrar, say - then it’s similar enough that you might just come to resent the reduced finances x

Slightly different because I took a career break, but then I went to a lower paid, lower responsibility job. Good at first, but now I am really struggling to move on from that job. So that’s my word of caution - how long might you feel satisfied with the lower paid job, and how difficult will it be to move on from it again if you want to.

Can you reduce your hours in your current role to make it more manageable?

I’m amazed that with 4 young kids, you and your DH both working full time, that you could have any sort of reasonable work life balance.

I left a very well paid job for a part-time role with a £15k FTE pay cut. So a massive hit to our income. Best thing I ever did for the DC. They got opportunities they’d never have had if I’d stayed in the well paid job because I had so much more time.

Thanks for the different perspectives, it really helps.

The 2 roles are quite different, so it definitely isn’t a consultant to registrar type move. I imagine it would be difficult to move back into the space I’m currently in, but I’m not sure I want to tbh.

Interesting to hear the boredom impact, I have some external hobbies that I haven’t had time for in years, so was hoping to get back into them to temper any boredom.

Unfortunately, dropping hours in the job I’m in isn’t possible.

The work-life balance is 100% not there at the moment and everything else is suffering as a result. I just feel like I’ve explored the things I wanted to explore and reached the heights I wanted to reach, and now I realise it’s not all it’s cracked up to be and I want to shift gears back down and focus more on family life.

I’d say kids will soon be in secondary school so be mindful of any potential resentment when they no longer need you but their needs require the financial rewards the current role provides

I’d say do it and grab the opportunity! It sounds like both your head and your heart are leading you there? I’ve not quite taken a step down (more a lateral swerve across from a role in a very stressful firm to more-or-less the same role in a less stressful firm, with a consequential pay drop and likely less progression) but I am definitely much happier for it. I have a similar number of children to you (and I think they are seeing a better me for it!)

I took voluntary redundancy from a well paid job and chose a much lower paid job in manufacturing. Initially it was fun and I was very too productive, but also quite bored. Within a couple of months I was being approached with suggestions of moving into management (which I very much didn't want to do). I realised this wasn't a realistic job for me long term, and moved back to my original industry where I've been ever since.

I'm very much in this dilemma at the moment. Like you, OP, my family life has, taken a hit over the last few years and I'm strongly considering a change to allow me focus on family. My kids are growing up fast and I want to be around even if they're not seeking new out.
So no experience, yet, but right there with you. I've worked out what pay drop is affordable and actively trying to save at the moment to give a cushion.
Good luck OP

My husband has done this. He was incredibly stressed in previous job and went back to a job he’d done before and knew he could do easily.
so far the drop in pay hasn’t been massively noticeable due to the difference in tax band and he enjoys the job.
but his ego has taken a bit of a battering and he’s already looking at promotion opportunities (which i think is a mistake tbh).

Thanks for the thread! I've been wondering the same thing so curious to hear about others experience.

I'm the main earner with a high salary but I've come to absolutely hate my job. I was staying because of nursery fees and mat leave benefits, but I'm now pregnant with our 3rd (and last), and the older 2 will be in school by the time I go back to work after mat leave.

I know my company is about to announce a reorg, and I'm fairly confident my team will go.
I would much prefer leaving with the redundancy package and find a lower level role, ideally with no managerial responsibilities, closer to home. But pay drop would be 30-40k...

The job market is absolutely rubbish though! So I'm hesitant to take the risk.

In response to a pp saying that the dc won’t need you once in secondary, please don’t underestimate this. I’ve found mine need me more, to debrief after the school day, to keep them organised and on track, to just be there as a constant whilst they’re moving on and growing up in so many other ways. They also go to bed much later so you have less downtime alone in the evenings!

With primary aged children and making an assumption about your age (40s?) I’d seek to maintain higher earnings. Your personal earning ability would be important in various scenarios, eg divorce, ill health of your H.

I’d seek ways to improve your current situation, get help regarding your health, work less in your current job or to move to another well paid job.

In my experience lower paid jobs can be challenging / stressful too.

I'd be wary. I found the so called 'less stressy' job wasn't really.

I was frustrated at no longer being able to make decisions in the way the more senior job allowed and got irritated when the senior person then made a different decision to what I would have done. I got sick of having to check before doing things instead of having the autonomy I'd had. I felt out of the loop as I longer had access to information as I wasn't in the same meeting and groups at the senior level. I no longer had the 'positional authority' when dealing with people to ge tthem to do things and found it harder to get agreement from people who in the past would have been more junior to me. I was also a bit bored at not be able to use my knowedge & eperience to its fulllest and felt I was losing some of it through lack of use.

Add to that, ironically I was still responsible and accountable for things at my new 'lower' level and yet had even more mananagement layers above asking for things like reports and explanations etc so it was just as 'stressy', just in a different way. I think it depends what you do - my job just isn't something you can leave and go home and forget, whatever level you're at.

The money drop (about £20K some years ago) did hurt and all the above didn't make it worth it. I left and went for a higher level job again and am happier (and paid a lot more to compensate for any extra stress!).

I went through this 6 years ago. I left being a senior leader in a very stressful public service to being a middle manager in a charity in the same field. I took a 1/3 pay cut. It was a brilliant decision although I’d put it off so long I was totally burned out and had no choice. Should have done it earlier really. Since then I’ve progressed a bit in the new career but earnings and pension less then they would have been. Overall- great decision.

This is my experience. And I’ve only got 2 DC. Primary school years with wrap around care were easy in comparison.

Agree, secondary very challenging!

I did something like this for better work life balance - and being able to pick my kids up and do sports days etc.
It was nice to begin with but really boring with little autonomy. I switched again to find a better balance and I’ve managed it. I want to be there for my children but also work hard and make a bit more money where possible.

I went from teacher to TA.
Currently on 4th bout of cancer and don’t want ANY additional stress. Finances are shit, but health is everything.

I left teaching to be a gardener so a drastic pay cut. My husband is also a gardener and we’ve had a few years of working a lot of hours to pay off debt and be comfortable on the money we were earning. However, we knew it wasn’t forever and we are now debt and mortgage free. We could afford the income cut as long as we worked more for this few years and it was something we were willing to do as teaching was awful towards the end. The benefits even during this long working hours were that we barely gave work a thought once we were home and the job itself is nice and largely stressfree. We’re both still gardeners and the lifestyle works for us.