Would you find this annoying? Friend’s “jokes”

[Spicytunasarnie]

A friend of mine went through a few painful breakups in the past couple of years. First she got engaged with a man but broke up because “she wants 3 kids and he isn’t supportive of it”. Then she married a man who wanted kids in the beginning and then got cold feet afterwards, so she got divorced.
Since then she turned completely bitter about the idea of marriage and kids. She has been trying to fish information about my marriage (are there any problems??) and sending me Instagram posts about “why you shouldn’t have kids” that are supposed to be funny. I have a 4 year old son and another baby on the way and it has started to really irritate me. I have total respect for her life choices and don’t ever provide unsolicited advice, but this has started to feel like an intentional dig. AIBU?

She's jealous, you have what she hasn't been able to have.

I think she's obviously been through a lot and is maybe realising that it's not going to happen for her so she's fronting it out by saying she's not interested in marriage and children. I'd ignore her instagram posts, if she doesn't get a response, she'll likely realise they're not well received. If she persists, you could tell her that you're not sure if she's being jokey but that her posts seem like a criticism of your life choices. If she's a good friend, she should be sorry for upsetting you - if she's not, then she's obviously not a good friend!

If she’s just posting them in instagram then I’d ignore them. If she’s sending you stuff about how miserable your life should be then I’d say stuff like

I don’t see it like that
I enjoy being a mother
etc.

I think you are being quite generous in thinking it’s an unintentional dig. I don’t see how she can unintentionally send you stuff about ‘why you shouldn’t have kids’. She needs counselling or similar. She doesn’t get to tear into you because she’s upset.

Agree, I'd ignore / grey rock / change the subject if she does in person.

She has obviously had a rough ride and now doesn't envisage herself having the life she'd wanted. That is really sad, but she doesn't get to use you as her punching bag.

Jealousy. Pure and simple. She’s bitter. She’s not a friend

She's had a hard time, but sending 'why you shouldn't have kids' posts to a pregnant woman is unacceptable. I would be distancing myself from her sadly.

She could just find them genuinely funny. Me & my friend send each other funny memes about not having kids and we both have kids that we love very much. If you want her to stop
just tell her ' stop sending me this crap I don't find it funny.