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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I in the wrong here?

1 reply

Gc1992 · 22/09/2025 20:26

Our 3 year old has started coming home from nursery with poo in his pants so my partner and I just wanted to make sure nursery were wiping him properly as he’s too young to do it himself. My partner was all for sending the manager an email, following up with a phone call and also talking to his key worker and suggesting adding this to his independent learning plan (which he is already on). Whereas I just wanted a casual conversation with the key worker to make sure they know he can’t wipe himself. Anyway this should have been a simple conversation between us but he was being all dominant saying no we’ll do this blah blah blah and when I said I didn’t want him to be confrontational or it to be a big deal he got all defensive then childish saying you deal with it then and leave me out of it. Then he said he wanted to calm things down and he said that I had been having a go at him and criticising him so I asked what I had done or said and he couldn’t answer. He just then said he didn’t want to talk about it anymore and I was carrying on the argument but he brought it back up 🤷🏼‍♀️

OP posts:
Springadorable · 22/09/2025 20:30

Just sounds like this has escalated and you are both fundamentally on the same page and think the nursery need to be taking better care of him. You're on the same team - the nursery is at fault here. Personally I would email as I want a paper trail should I need to escalate it later on, so I would lean towards your husband's approach.

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