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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Being the black sheep of the family

2 replies

Breadandsticks · 21/09/2025 23:50

I’m probably having abit of a pity party.

I’ve been living with family for over a year, and I’m finally moving out. I do have kids and a partner, so it has been a full house.

Anyway this weekend we had to move items from storage and I mentioned I won’t be around over the weekend. I did leave my room (which is my childhood) room somewhat of a mess with clothes piled up on the bed etc. But I was in and out. Family didn’t help, they haven’t even asked me how things are going - but I’m not too fussed. Came down with a terrible cold and the. Food poisoning so everything slowed down. But me and my partner have spent the whole weekend moving.

When I came back to my family home after 2 days, everything was in bin bags (my DD asked me if my family are disowning me 😅) Fine, I can sort through that. And then I found one bin bag with me and the baby’s things in it and rubbish - things like used tissues, dust etc.

I found some old diaries from when I was a teen and I found that in one of the bags mixed in with rubbish.

Whilst I’m a 30 something year old woman and I should really know better, something in me has been taken back to being that 14 year old teen that didn’t get on with anyone in the family (following a terrible divorce) and the feeling of just not fitting in. Gosh I feel like a big baby.

I don’t really want advice (or maybe I need it) as I feel like I am being unreasonable and I should snap out of it. But has anyone as an adult been taken back to a horrible moment in childhood/teen and just felt numb. I want to physically leave but need to sort through these bags.

OP posts:
theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 21/09/2025 23:54

There is something about stepping back through parents' doors that makes everyone revert to feeling 15.

I'm not quite sure why they would have put all your stuff in bin bags and I'd be annoyed too - but equally you don't want to do a teenage turn and overreact or add meanings onto it it doesn't have.

Deep breaths, finish the sorting, get out of there -

Breadandsticks · 22/09/2025 00:30

Thanks @theunbreakablecleopatrajones I agree. It has been weird being back there. At least I’ll be at home tomorrow. I definitely won’t be tantruming.

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