Elevenerife

[Googlybear21]

For those not familiar with the saying "you've been to Tenerife, I've been to Elevenerife". This is a post about having an annoying member of a friend group that always has to one up everyone else. They've been everywhere, business or first class, naturally. Their only child excels at private school, academically and in sports. I'm pleased for her DC, they are nice and totally unlike Mum. Everything is turned into a competition. She dominates our group meet ups with all her news and I come away not knowing how our other friends are or how their DC are doing.

The group's children will be applying to Uni next year and of course driving lessons are starting. Elevenerife will be trying to make sure that her DC passes quickest, best uni. How do you deal with someone like this? I secretly wish that she wouldn't come to our meet ups and haven't mentioned it to other friends.

I let them have their moment but then focus my attention and response to those who need that limelight - "that's great Janet! Mary - tell me more about it" type vibes.
Address them but always do what you can to bring it back to person who needs to be heard, your elevenerifer won't notice and your friend will feel seen. A similar technique that you'd use with small children "that's great son but mums talking to her friend at the moment".

If she makes you feel this way then I can guarantee your others friends feel the same way, you can't be the only one bothered by her! You have my sympathies, I used to work with a lady like this and she did my head in. She was an expert on everything and her kids were the best at everything. I also have one similar in my school mum friendship group. We're not super close but a good few of us meet up occasionally for coffee or dinner and drinks. She is constantly banging on about her daughter and it really makes me dread these meet ups. I always try my best not to have to sit bedside her, that always helps!

Just smile and nod, and ask someone else a question about themselves.