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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Rehoming our 2 cats

121 replies

holleeamara · 19/09/2025 12:32

2 years ago me and my partner rescued 2 cats. 3 months ago we found out I was pregnant despite being on the Depo shot. We’ve decided to keep it, as I had an abortion in the past (previous relationship) and regretted it deeply. Our landlord is now about to evict us, due to him selling the property. We have been trying to move out for the past year anyway, due to living in a tiny 1 bed flat. And for the past year was always turned down due to having pets. We just said we’d wait and hopefully find somewhere that allows pets. But, now due to being pregnant and our 3 month notice looming.. I suggested we may have to rehome the cats, in order to find a property that 1. Is big enough for the 3 of us, and 2. We are looking like we are going to be homeless otherwise. I understand pets are a lifelong commitment, yaddah yaddah yaddah, but my unborn child comes before me, comes before anyone! And definitely comes before the cats. I even suggested they go to live with his mother who’s happy to take them, but he won’t allow that either. I feel really stumped and confused as I’d be willing to do anything for this life I have created.. but I don’t think he feels the same. We have even tried giving landlords extra deposit in order to have the cats but they refuse. I feel like this is now our only option. (We don’t qualify for council/social housing, btw)

OP posts:
Whatsallthisthen2025 · 19/09/2025 21:59

RedRobyn24 · 19/09/2025 21:57

@AutumnalPieChomperi don’t know what planet you live on but it is absolutely impossible to find somewhere that allows pets. It’s very difficult to find rental accommodation period nowadays, the government made it so difficult to be a landlord virtually nobody wants to do it anymore.

Right. This woman is not just ditching her cats she is trying to find somewhere to live with her human child, has met a brick wall and is out of options and really worried, and has a mother in law who can take the cats and is willing to do so.

The insanity of pretending this is abnormal or cruel behaviour on the part of the OP is very puzzling.

IkeaMeatballGravy · 19/09/2025 22:02

I would be sending him and the cats to live with his mother.

You aren't proposing to send them off to some random person, he will still get to visit them and maybe in the future they can settle back with you. His priority should be making sure his pregnant partner has a home.

AzureCats · 19/09/2025 22:21

Your husband is being silly. It's much better for your MIL to take the cats if she is able to care for them properly.

Perhaps you can have them returned if you're able to find a pet friendly landlord in the future. I would concentrate on finding a suitable property with a decent landlord for your growing family, and once you've settled in you can revisit asking the landlord about cats.

Alternatively cat rescues sometimes have foster carers for pets in these types of situations. They won't necessarily be stuck in a cage. Perhaps contact a few local ones?

Please don't just give them away for free at the last minute. Sadly this is how animal abusers find animals to torture, pretending they're going to a good home.

Whatsallthisthen2025 · 19/09/2025 22:33

IkeaMeatballGravy · 19/09/2025 22:02

I would be sending him and the cats to live with his mother.

You aren't proposing to send them off to some random person, he will still get to visit them and maybe in the future they can settle back with you. His priority should be making sure his pregnant partner has a home.

Absolutely this.

AutumnalPieChomper · 20/09/2025 02:27

GeniuneWorkOfFart · 19/09/2025 16:22

When and where did you last try to rent a property?

Show quote history

New York City. Most places there allow cats.

GeniuneWorkOfFart · 20/09/2025 08:21

AutumnalPieChomper · 20/09/2025 02:27

New York City. Most places there allow cats.

Edited
Show quote history

How very relevant to a poster living in Kent, UK.

Wordsmithery · 20/09/2025 09:25

Overtheatlantic · 19/09/2025 12:46

Your breezy and uncaring attitude comes across horribly. Do rehome your cats as they deserve better than you.

That's unfair, @Overtheatlantic. OP is simply explaining the situation factually and clearly.

OP, ask your partner what they suggest. If they can't come up with anything workable then I'm afraid he has no choice but to agree to re-home. Presumably he doesn't want your baby to live on the streets.

SkibidiSigma · 20/09/2025 09:41

This thread is disgusting. Not the OP but many of the responses. I bet some of you have never had to rent, have never had to move numerous times just because the landlord decides. It's hard enough finding somewhere to rent anyway as demand is far greater than supply now, try adding pets in the mix it's even harder. Oh and btw it's hardly surprising op has been given notice to leave now as many landlords are selling before the new rules come into effect, so not 'convenient' at all. How about keeping quiet if you can't say anything nice to someone who is already in a stressful situation?

EarthlyNightshade · 20/09/2025 10:13

Plmnki · 19/09/2025 21:55

You can’t look after two cats … yet you’re bringing another human into the world?

This thread has really brought out the nasty comments.
Poor OP, I hope you are able to get more support in real life.

dilemma2516 · 20/09/2025 10:15

holleeamara · 19/09/2025 12:32

2 years ago me and my partner rescued 2 cats. 3 months ago we found out I was pregnant despite being on the Depo shot. We’ve decided to keep it, as I had an abortion in the past (previous relationship) and regretted it deeply. Our landlord is now about to evict us, due to him selling the property. We have been trying to move out for the past year anyway, due to living in a tiny 1 bed flat. And for the past year was always turned down due to having pets. We just said we’d wait and hopefully find somewhere that allows pets. But, now due to being pregnant and our 3 month notice looming.. I suggested we may have to rehome the cats, in order to find a property that 1. Is big enough for the 3 of us, and 2. We are looking like we are going to be homeless otherwise. I understand pets are a lifelong commitment, yaddah yaddah yaddah, but my unborn child comes before me, comes before anyone! And definitely comes before the cats. I even suggested they go to live with his mother who’s happy to take them, but he won’t allow that either. I feel really stumped and confused as I’d be willing to do anything for this life I have created.. but I don’t think he feels the same. We have even tried giving landlords extra deposit in order to have the cats but they refuse. I feel like this is now our only option. (We don’t qualify for council/social housing, btw)

Yaddah yaddah yaddah ? God you sound unpleasant, there is literally a crisis in cat rescue I would be suprised if you can find somewhere for them
what a ghastly person you must be

IamnotSethRogan · 20/09/2025 11:03

dilemma2516 · 20/09/2025 10:15

Yaddah yaddah yaddah ? God you sound unpleasant, there is literally a crisis in cat rescue I would be suprised if you can find somewhere for them
what a ghastly person you must be

Show quote history

Have you even read the post ? She's not dumping them in a rescue, she's found them a home with a loving family member who will care for them.

Honestly this thread is absolutely bonkers, acting like the OP is some evil women who just wants to get rid of the cats to the point of making up a home eviction just to justify it?

Some of you need to have a look at yourselves, pretending you are the most ethical person in the world because you haven't rehomed an animal despite never being in this womens particular set of circumstances.

There is absolutely nothing ethical about making someone in a shit, stressful situation feel bad about themselves when they're just looking for a practical solution in a difficult situation.

And one more time for the people who have missed it;

SHE ISN'T GOING TO SEND THE CATS TO A SHELTER, SHE HAS FOUND THEM A SAFE HOME WITH HER MOTHER IN LAW

Whatsallthisthen2025 · 20/09/2025 11:12

IamnotSethRogan · 20/09/2025 11:03

Have you even read the post ? She's not dumping them in a rescue, she's found them a home with a loving family member who will care for them.

Honestly this thread is absolutely bonkers, acting like the OP is some evil women who just wants to get rid of the cats to the point of making up a home eviction just to justify it?

Some of you need to have a look at yourselves, pretending you are the most ethical person in the world because you haven't rehomed an animal despite never being in this womens particular set of circumstances.

There is absolutely nothing ethical about making someone in a shit, stressful situation feel bad about themselves when they're just looking for a practical solution in a difficult situation.

And one more time for the people who have missed it;

SHE ISN'T GOING TO SEND THE CATS TO A SHELTER, SHE HAS FOUND THEM A SAFE HOME WITH HER MOTHER IN LAW

Show quote history

Yep. All of this.

RosesAndHellebores · 20/09/2025 11:17

I'd rehome the boyfriend who won't marry you and seems more concerned about the cats than the baby and reading between the lines would likely have preferred the abortion option.

I'd keep the baby and the cats.

Original poster
holleeamara · 04/10/2025 06:05

That is the daftest comment I’ve had so far. Hope you’re not this miserable in real life buddy!

OP posts:
Original poster
holleeamara · 04/10/2025 06:08

Thanks, our budget is not high and we’re also both currently on benefits, which landlords don’t regularly accept. Also, I’m not moving to anywhere in Kent, I’m staying in my current area due to having family here. I’m not moving 3 hours away from my family when there is a baby on the way in order to keep cats, that’s that.

OP posts:
Original poster
holleeamara · 04/10/2025 06:11

The cats are fed, warm, happy. The cats are happy as can be. I can absolutely look after them! Are you going to let us come and live with you? How kind!!!

OP posts:
Original poster
holleeamara · 04/10/2025 06:12

I live in the UK buddy!

OP posts:
Original poster
holleeamara · 04/10/2025 06:13

Did you read my post? His mother said she will have them. Get a grip.

OP posts:
WonderingWanda · 04/10/2025 06:42

Your partner is being unreasonable. You are in a difficult situation and many landlords don't accept pets. A arrangement with your mil would be a great solution.

dilemma2516 · 04/10/2025 18:43

holleeamara · 04/10/2025 06:08

Thanks, our budget is not high and we’re also both currently on benefits, which landlords don’t regularly accept. Also, I’m not moving to anywhere in Kent, I’m staying in my current area due to having family here. I’m not moving 3 hours away from my family when there is a baby on the way in order to keep cats, that’s that.

Why are you having a kid if you can’t afford to support yourself

AzureCats · 04/10/2025 21:44

So has your partner changed his mind about leaving the cats with MIL? How's the house hunting in general going?

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